In Ben's memory

[gradona]

I just lost my 8 year old Boxer yesterday. About a year and a half ago he started drinking a ton of water and started having accidents in the house, totally out of character. He always had regular Vet care. I took him to the Vet and blood tests were in the normal range. The Vet suspected Cushings but recommended I make an appointment with Cornell University which I did. After a day of tests it was confirmed that it was cushings. He was started on 50 ml of compounded Trilostane twice daily. The symptoms were reduced and he was, for the most part back to normal. 6 weeks later a Stim test indicated an increase in the meds so he went on 60mg capsules of Veroryl. 2 Stim tests and about a year later he was doing well but his ravenous thirst had returned. The Vet could not explain why. In march of this year he became very lethargic and seemed to be very confused. A Stim test indicated his numbers had gone way low (1.3) and the Vet contacted Cornell for advice. Cornell said to reduce the dose back to 50 ml twice daily. Subsequently his condition worsened and he was euthanized yesterday. Needless to say my heart is broken and my guilt is large. I can't help but think someone failed him and by following instructions as told I feel guilty as well.

Do my circumstances sound normal? He was such a Great dog.

[Harley PoMMom]

Oh my, I am so sorry for your loss and my heart goes out to you at this most difficult time. In this time of great loss it is normal to feel all those "should of could of" we all have been there, however that guilt is not necessary, we see your deep love for your special boy, Ben.

We would be so honored to add Ben's name to our "In Loving Memory" Forum. We cannot ease your pain over losing him, but we can join you in honoring Ben and celebrating all that he means to you. So if it would ever be a comfort to share more of his life's story with us, it would be our privilege to read anything you would care to write.

Again, I am so sorry for your loss.

With Heartfelt Sympathy, Lori

[Joan2517]

I'm sorry as well...it's so hard not to feel guilty. It sounds like you cared for him very well and he was much loved.

My Lena died unexpectedly also, and I have been consumed with the "what ifs" and "what happened"? I loved her so much that any answer wouldn't be enough to make me feel better. Sometimes we can only accept. I'm still trying....

[gradona]

Thanks for the kind words. Ben was truly one of a kind. He was gentle and very obedient. He had the run of the (Rural) neighborhood and all 6 of my neighbors looked forward to his visits. For a while before his sickness he would go to work with me everyday and everyone there loved him. Yep one of a kind, I'll never have another like him.
http://i847.photobucket.com/albums/ab33/gradona/0310121649_zps355eampk.jpg (http://s847.photobucket.com/user/gradona/media/0310121649_zps355eampk.jpg.html)

[DoxieMama]

Awww, what a cutey!

I'm so sorry for your loss.

As Lori and Joan said, all those questions and wonderings are completely normal. Allow yourself time to grieve, and be gentle with yourself during this time.

Hugs and a shoulder as needed...
Shana

[apollo6]

May sweet BEN look down on you from heaven. Sadly these drugs most be used with extreme caution. My Apollo struggled for two years with cushing and was also on Trilostane. He was on the lowest dosage. Each fur ball reacts differently to medicines.
My sincere sympathy. He was a beautiful dog.
Sonja,Apollo

[molly muffin]

I am so very sorry to hear of the loss of your dear Ben. It is so very hard to lose them. I don't know anyone who doesn't go through the what if, should I have, guilt when a dear family member is lost to cushings. We always second guess ourselves.
Ben sounds like such a total love and his picture is just full of personality. I know your heart is broken.
My sincerest condolences.

[gradona]

Thank you everyone for your kind words, he will be missed.

[Allison]

Belated hugs! I've been away from this forum for a couple of months, but wanted to say I'm sorry for your loss. Eight years will have given you lots of special moments. Ben will be greatly missed.

I can't answer your question with regards to Cushings specifically, but can tell you that some diseases are unpredictable. Although many cats can live for many years after being diagnosed with CKD, some like mine due within weeks, and it's definitely a shock. You regularly monitored Ben and followed expert vet advice. There's nothing to feel guilty about.

Thank you for sharing Ben's photo. He looks friendly and fun. Be gentle to yourself and take time to grieve

[kanga]

It's breaking my heart too! This is the hardest part of having a pup in our life a friends a love ones a family member. I know how you feeling and you're always in my thoughts just be strong it takes time to accept what happen. I pray for you and for his soul I want to give you some hugs.