My Lovely Angel Luna

[SasAndYunah]

Marianne, you may know that I take Quincy to the "Allergy clinic for canines", highly specialised in, surpirse, ....allergies :D Anyway, they have started to use a new brand of shampoo and spray, coming from the USA. So I got curious and looked them up. I think it may be beneficial to you and Luna too, to know of this site :)

“As dermatologists we know how devastating recurrent Staph and especially methicillin-resistant Staph infections can have on pets and their families. We wanted to provide pet owners with both reliable information and an effective pet skin care line since not all pet parents have access to a veterinary dermatologist.”

So of course I had to think of you and Luna :) Also because Douxo is very difficult for you to obtain, if I get it right...

http://www.healthyskin4dogs.com/overview/

Anyway, have a look around, can't hurt to keep this in the back of your mind,

Sas :)

[labblab]

Hey Sas, thanks very much for this new product info. I will definitely "bookmark" it for consideration if we decide to make some changes. For right now, though, I am so happy with the results of the Douxo shampoo that I won't likely rock the boat. And fortunately, it is very easy for me to buy. It is the Allerderm Spot-on that is no longer being made in the U.S. But I have still have another package of ampules on hand, so that will tide me over for the time being.

Luna had been totally clear again for a couple of weeks, but I just found another small spot at bath-time yesterday. So it really does seem that this will be a chronic issue for us, and I will always be welcoming new product info. On the positive side, it will soon be a year since we spotted the first lesion, and nothing more sinister has developed re: an underlying smoldering illness. So I am believing it most likely that allergies are at the root of Luna's infections, too, and we will remain vigilant about keeping them as well-controlled as we possibly can.

Thanks, as always, for sharing your info!

[SasAndYunah]

Good to hear that Luna is doing well. And yes, like you said, it seems to be a chronic issue but as long as you can keep it contained with her baths and spot-on, then thats how it is. And frankly, that's not too bad either ;) Allergies are so complicated and can be so very difficult to treat or rather, difficult to find the right treatment, that a small lesion every now and then, is rather a good outcome :)
Ahhhh it's the Allerderm...sorry, I got that mixed up with the Douxo :) If you ever need the Allerderm spot-on's and you can no longer find them in the USA, I can buy them for you and sent them to you, no problem (as long as there is no problem with customs...?) But for now you're good :)

Wishing you and yours all the best,

Sas :)

[molly muffin]

So good to hear that Luna continues to do well. Sas is a River of good info as always. :)

[SasAndYunah]

And how's lovely Luna doing? :) Hope she continued to do well on her baths and spot-on treatments... :)

Sas and Quincy :)

[labblab]

<Knocking on wood for good luck to continue!> Luna remains lesion free right now, so seeing my last post here, I think it's been about three months since we saw the last spot :). I fully expect that at some point there will still be more lesions, but I feel optimistic that now we can keep them under control when they happen.

We are still bathing every two weeks with the Douxo, using the Allerderm after each bath, giving the oral omegas, and she is still eating her duck food. As I wrote earlier, it's not a limited ingredient food other than being a single novel protein, but she loves it and we're doing well on it with stable weight. So we are all happy campers right now, and thanks so much for asking! ;)

[molly muffin]

Yes! Great news on two fronts today. Long may she remain lesion free. Whoop whoop lol

[lulusmom]

Marianne, I suspect that you are every bit anxiety riddled with Luna's skin problems as anybody here who is dealing with cushing's. In my opinion, chronic skin problems are worse. It's a lot more uncomfortable for a dog and it's a whole lot more work....at least in my experience it is. Victories are not easily won so a big congratulations on gaining the upper hand. I hope and pray you are able to hold the line for a very, very long time.

[SasAndYunah]

So glad to hear that Luna has remained lesion free for quite some time now...sure seems like you have them well controlled with your current appraoch :)

And I do agree with you Glynda...chronic skin disease/problems are awfull. To be able to find an appraoch that works, that keeps things under control, would be such a relief but it can be very hard to achieve.

But Luna sure seems to be on the right track....way to go, Marianne :D

Sas and Quincy :)

[mytil]

Oh that is good news indeed!!!! Fingers, paws crossed she will continue to do so well.
T.

[Budsters Mom]

Okay Marianne, What is going on with lovely Luna's tummy? :o:confused:

[labblab]

Dang if I know! Good news is she's not acutely ill -- good energy, good appetite. It's just that over the past couple of weeks she's barfed three times for no apparent reason, and had several episodes of large, soft, mucousy poops. Both of these things are very unusual for her.

It could just be something's up with her food. Are you still feeding Rosie the Acana? I'm still giving Luna the Duck & Pear kibble, but her stool has never been as consistently perfect as it was before they added the U.S. manufacturing and switched up the American ingredients. Also, unfortunately my lovely Luna is the "mouth of the south" when it comes to grabbing bites of any conceivable garbage she can find while out on our walks :eek:.

So I really wasn't all that worried when I took her in, thinking it was food or garbage, but both the vet and I were a bit bothered that she's down from 65 to 61 pounds since the end of June. She has been getting a lot more exercise since Peg died, though, since I have more free time to take her on longer walks both morning and afternoon :o. Part of the extra worry about GI issues is because she has been consistently taking the NSAID for a while now. I stopped giving that the first time she threw up. But I think that's why the vet immediately wanted to draw blood yesterday in order to check on her liver and kidneys. So I should hear those results today, as well as the fecal. The snap test for giardia was negative, but I know that can be hard to diagnose and I do worry about that since they irrigate everything with lake water where we walk. I also worry about lepto because it's common among wildlife here. I have her vaccinated, but as we know, not all strains are covered.

In other news, this month marks a solid year that she has been lesion-free!! YAY! Still doing the Douxo shampoo, oral omegas, Allerderm spot-on, and that's the reason I've stuck with the duck food. Also, we did finally head in for an orthopedic consult late in the summer, and the specialist confirmed that her limp is originating in her right elbow. Without more involved imaging he can't be sure of the exact issue, but a leading candidate may be a bone chip that migrates around in the joint. He will be happy to perform an arthroscopic procedure on her any time we wish, but since the problem remains intermittent (and she hasn't been limping much at all ever since the consult), we haven't rushed her in to have that done.

So overall she had been doing really well before this GI stuff started. It just tugs at my heart cooking up her pots of chicken and rice. Peg had SOOO many GI issues through the years that I cannot begin to count the chicken/rice dinners I cooked for her. She always loved them, though, and would park herself right next to the stove as soon as she heard rice hitting the measuring cup. This week it has been little Lunie taking her place at my feet. I just don't want Lunie to be sick now, too. I'm just not ready for anything bad to be wrong. So I'm hoping it's just her food. It's a pain to start researching food again, but I'll take that job in a skinny minute rather than having something worse be wrong right now.

[molly muffin]

I hate when they change the recipes on dog food. They never seem to make it better. Hopefully it is just the food. Do you add Ina probiotic? Wonder if that would help her tummy.

Long walks sound wonderful. I'm sure Luna loves them too.

Let's see what the results show today from blood work. Hopefully nothing there.

[labblab]

The vet's given me both metronidazole and a probiotic to give her right now. Peg always got a daily probiotic cuz of her issues, but Luna has always been as solid as a rock with no GI problems whatsoever. So I always figured, if it ain't broke, don't fix it. But maybe we're due for a change now.

[labblab]

Vet left a message while we were out for our walk -- said her bloodwork was great. Whew! :) :)

Didn't mention anything about the stool sample, so I'm assuming it was negative. So for right now, we'll finish the five days of metronidazole, continue the probiotic, and then start transitioning back to kibble again and see what happens. If she has problems again, I'll go ahead and shift to a different food to see if that makes a difference. But feeling much better after getting that lab report!

[Squirt's Mom]

ugh...I hate when they reformulate foods! Like Sharlene said, it never seems to be for the good of the dog.

I hope sweet Luna is back to her normal solid self soon!

[molly muffin]

She might still be a rock and it doesn't preclude that the got something in her mouth that she shouldn't have and introduced some bacteria to her stomach.
So, hopefully this will do the trick and she'll be right in no time and this will just be a tiny blip in the month.

[Budsters Mom]

Yes, Rosie is still eating the old formula of Pork and Butternut Squash, and doing great on it. I bought up several bags when I realized the formula was changing and am now on the last bag. It is time to start transitioning, but to what?? Pork and Butternut squash, has been changed to Pork and Squash. Pinto beans have been added as a staple. They are really high on Rosie's allergy list. I don't know whether to try it anyway. I haven't been able to find anything else that has only pork as the meat base, with limited ingredients. Her allergies don't give me much to work with. I have been putting off the transition because she is doing so well, but my time is running out.

I hope Luna's stomach has settled and she's back to normal once again.


It could just be something's up with her food. Are you still feeding Rosie the Acana?

[Harley PoMMom]

Thinking about you both today and sending positive energy and healing thoughts with love....♥♥♥

[labblab]

Thank you so much! I'm very happy to report that Luna is safely home, and all is well :-))))). The eyelid procedure and the dental all went smoothly, and I'm sure that we'll all be sleeping a whole lot better tonight ;-).

Whew........!!!!
Marianne

[Budsters Mom]

Wonderful news indeed!

[Katy1]

It’s so good to hear the news about Luna. Maybe you can take a big deep breath and just hold her without worrying for maybe 30 seconds. Get some rest and check your messages tomorrow when you have time. Blessings, Karen

[Joan2517]

Excellent news, Marianne!

[Harley PoMMom]

So happy to read that everything went well!!!! Huge hugs and loving kisses to you both!!

[Squirt's Mom]

YAY!! I am so glad this is behind BOTH of you!

[Budsters Mom]

Happy 12th Birthday Luna!!!
I remember when Luna was the little sister in need of a thread of her own. She certainly stepped up when Peg joined our other angels! Congrats to you all!

Hugs and gentle pats for our girl,

[Joan2517]

Happy Birthday, Luna!!

[labblab]

Awwww, my sweet Luna thanks everybody for their birthday wishes!!! :D :D

(And so does her mom ;-))))))))))))

[Harley PoMMom]

Happy belated Birthday, sweet Luna!!!!!

[Trish]

Hi Marianne
hope all is going well with Luna, it’s seems strange to me to think she getting older, but I guess it’s now 4 1/2 years since Flynny died and then Peg not long after him. The years just fly by. I never got another dog, he was irreplaceable then and still is now. I still have the two rascally cats who are now five and they are a joy and keep me on my toes and luckily in good health. I don’t know how my vet clinic is still functioning after I stopped our frequent flyer visits and their steady income after Flynn passed lol but a yearly visit for their checkup and jabs and a good catchup with the vet is enough

happy holidays to your family and Luna x

[Jonathan]

Just read this...
You guys/girls are incredible!

Anyone just now stumbling on this site... be thankful.

What a wonderful/thoughtful/concerned/attentive group!

[labblab]

Friday morning Luna left us. She turned 14 in August, and every single day of her life has been such a gift to us. I see I’ve not been recently updating here, but elsewhere I’ve written about her worsening mobility issues during these past couple of years. Weak legs and sore hips steadily limited her physically, but her sweet spirit always remained unchanged. During this past month, her legs had grown much weaker. She had gotten so wobbly this week, and Thursday night her hind end gave way for good. We loved on her all Thursday night, and Friday morning we carried her to the car,

For the first time ever, she was calm driving in to the vet. I think she knew she needed their help to be free. Everyone there was so kind, and she was so peaceful at the end.

But coming home to the empty house has shredded our hearts. Luna was here for us when we drove home without Peg. Now there’s nobody and it hurts so bad to be here alone. Except for the two months between losing Barkis and bringing home baby Peg, we’ve had a doggie with us for 30 years. Of course we knew this day was coming, but I think the only way I made it through these last weeks with Luna was to not think about what it would be like to be here without her. I don’t know if I could have been brave enough to take her in had I thought about afterwards. But afterwards is here now. And it hurts so much. I look for her everywhere. I miss her from the time I wake up to the time I try to go to sleep. I miss my little girl more than words can ever say.

Thank you for everything, little Lunie. For everything. I know you’re now safely with Grandmother and your Sissy Peg and all your new doggie friends. But always know how much mommy and daddy love you and will always love you. We would do anything to have you back, but only if you could run and jump once again. And for that, your spirit had to be freed. These past few weeks we’d see your little legs moving while you were asleep, and we’d smile so much because we knew you were running in your dreams. Now we know you can run once again whenever you want, as fast as the wind. How can we not be grateful for that. But please, every once in a while, please run back here to us again, OK? Even if we can’t see you, we’ll know you’re here for a visit.

I love you my sweetheart. So much. Forever and ever you’ll be my baby girl. Now and forever.
Your mommy

[Budsters Mom]

I am so very sorry to read this news today. Run free my lovely Luna. I suggested that name. It was back at the time when she needed her own thread. Remember?

Many, many, hugs,

[labblab]

Oh Kathy, absolutely I remember that it was you. Thank you for that, and thank you so much for your hugs today. I need them very badly. The house is so quiet and empty. It is so hard.

[molly muffin]

Oh Marianne. :( I was so very sorry to see this update. My heart just breaks for you to have had to say that goodbye to the lovely Luna. Nothing makes this easier to get through unfortunately, it’s just moment by moment and day by day. I am sure that Luna is out there. Watching over you, her family and playing with Peg. I like to think that anyway.

I go with a star is born each time we have to say these goodbyes. So tonight I’ll look to the sky and say hello to Luna and wish her well.

Big hugs Mariann and know that I am thinking of you also tonight and wishing you peace of heart

Sharlene

[labblab]

Oh Sharlene, it’s been so long since we’ve talked and it means so much to me that you stopped by. This is the third morning awakening afterwards, and the mornings seem to be the very worst. No doggie to feed or to take care of. No wagging tail or bright eyes. No soft head to cuddle. It’s so hard to try to face the long day ahead. So seeing your post here this morning is a gift that does give me some comfort and peace as I try to get started.

I love the idea of Luna’s star. Thank you for that, and for thinking of us all. I know you know how hard this is, and I so appreciate your kind words.

At such a sad time, it’s so good to see old friends. Thank you so much for writing.

[labblab]

And Kathy, if you should stop back again, I want you to know how much I’ve always appreciated your help with both Peg and Luna. In looking back though this thread, I’m reminded of how many times you were here to support us — in addition to encouraging me to start this thread itself. We’ve all been through so much together, and I don’t know how I would have made it through the hard times without help. I’ll always be grateful.

[Budsters Mom]

Well, you managed to do one thing today, which was to post Lunas beautiful picture in the snow. She looked so happy! That is enough for one day. Both you and hubby are grieving, so give yourselves a break. Try for two things tomorrow. I couldn’t manage to get up off the floor and function, so you are doing much better than I did at this point. It never gets easier. I keep thinking of the photos I saw in your album several years ago of baby Luna playing with Peg. Now she’s gone and it’s hard for me to get my head around it. I had previously read that she was having mobility issues and knew that this was coming, but I didn’t want to go there. She had 14 beautiful years, which is a gift beyond measure. Thank you for sharing all of your precious babies with us.

[labblab]

Thank you so much for writing, Kathy. I’m trying hard to stay busy because when I stop & sit down I start looking for her in the places she would be. She always stayed close to me, always. My little shadow. I can’t believe she’s gone.

Remember Addy’s “one good thing?” I’m trying so hard to stick to that. Yesterday was the picture. Today I called the nearest shelter and they think they maybe can use Luna’s unused medication in addition to her food. I knew they could use the food, but I’m so relieved about the meds, too. I will drive it all up to them tomorrow. I had just ordered a new big bag of kibble and two new flats of canned food. I usually only order one flat at a time. But this time I ordered two in order to make it through Christmas. I was tempting fate, I know. But this way a shelter dog can have it for Christmas dinner. And the drive will help keep me busy. I’ve got to stay busy.

[labblab]

One week ago this morning you left us, my Angel. I miss you more than words can ever say.

[Budsters Mom]

Yes, the first week is hell! We look for them everywhere. We don’t know what to do with ourselves because so much of our time had been devoted to their care. We need to find a new purpose, which is daunting. A reason to get up in the morning and function. Yes, Addy’s one good thing. Our fur babies are tuned into our hearts and souls. I think much better than most people. They know what we think, want, and need, often before we do. Setting them free and releasing them from pain is our ultimate act of love. It is one of the hardest things that I’ve ever had to do. Or will ever do. Somehow, if we’re lucky, we eventually move on and open our hearts to others who need us. However, our fur angels are forever loved and never forgotten.
I know it’s tough for you right now Marianne. Luna has joined Barkis and Peg. Their spirits remain is a special pocket in your heart forever. They will always be watching out for you.

[addy]

Dearest Marianne,
It is with a heavy heart that I read this so very sad news about precious Luna. She was and will always remain your special girl.
Since the pandemic started, I think our darlings took on new roles as our therapy dogs, helping cope with the isolation. Coping mechanisms we may have used after such a huge loss may be different now if we still have to take a bit of care trying to stay healthy.
There are never words that seem adequate to say when we lose such a dear companion and friend. Even one good thing can be hard to find.
Know that we care so very much about you and send the warmest, tightest hugs we can.
How I wish we could all be together to cry, to laugh, to remember Lovely Luna; honor her memory.
Take my hand and we walk through the sorrow together.
Much love always.

[mytil]

My dearest Marianne,
I wish I could even find the words - my heart is with you!!!! Most of us know this crushing kind of pain and grief when we loose our babies.
We are all here for you girl! Much Love and ((((((hugs)))))
T.
I sent you a message

[mommyslittlegirl]

Marianne, I can’t begin to tell you how sorry I am for your loss.
I returned to tell my Cushing family Merry Christmas.
My heart hurts for you. I cry with you.
Hugs and more hugs

[Harley PoMMom]

Dearest Marianne,

I am so sorry for the loss of your most precious Luna, she was such a special girl and shall remain in all of our hearts forever. Luna has had a beautiful life with two of the best pet parents a furbaby could ever ask for. I know she will be missed terribly, and my heart goes out to you both at this most painful time. I realize there is nothing I can do or say to ease your pain but hopefully knowing that we are here for you will bring some kind of comfort.

RIP darling Luna

With heartfelt sympathy and love, Lori

[labblab]

To all my dear friends, thank you so much for writing to me. Your words and your presence here mean more to me than you’ll ever know.

[Squirt's Mom]

My dear friend,

I have read your post and note over and over trying to find the words that might bring you a modicum of peace but the tears always choked me. Luna has been part of all of us for so long; you have shared with us her joys and struggles and always with the love you carry for her so very obvious. I have no doubt whatsoever that she was at peace on her ride that day, not so much because she knew she needed help but because she knew the ones she loved most were the ones to be by her side, were the ones giving her this freedom, were the ones to take her pain. She knew all that she was would be forever safe with you until you could be together once again. So of course her Soul was at peace. She knew full well how very much she was, and is, loved.

I wish I could tell you some wonderful trick to make that empty, so loudly silent house feel more like home again but I don't know of any. I just know that in time the pain will be less, easier to carry. In time you will hear, see, and feel your precious baby girl's presence again...and, in time, that presence will bring a smile and then a giggle and then a laugh as those good and wonderful memories begin to over-ride the anguish.

You are never alone, Marianne. You are surrounded by so many here and elsewhere...and by those whom you love who have gone before. They never really leave us. Luna has lots of new friends and familiar loves with her now but I assure you she is always watching over you, sending that love that only she can offer.

My deepest sympathy and love,
Leslie




The Fourth Day

If you ever love an animal,
there are three days in your life you will always remember.
The first is a day, blessed with happiness,
when you bring home your young new friend.
You may have spent weeks deciding on a breed.
You may have asked numerous opinions of many vets,
or done long research in finding a breeder.
Or, perhaps in a fleeting moment,
you may have just chosen that silly looking mutt in a shelter —
simply because something in its eyes reached your heart.
But when you bring that chosen pet home,
and watch it explore, and claim its special place in your hall or front room —
and when you feel it brush against you for the first time —
it instills a feeling of pure love
you will carry with you through the many years to come.

The second day will occur eight or nine or ten years later.
It will be a day like any other.
Routine and unexceptional.
But, for a surprising instant,
you will look at your longtime friend
and see age where you once saw youth.
You will see slow deliberate steps
where you once saw energy.
And you will see sleep where you once saw activity.
So you will begin to adjust your friend's diet —
and you may add a pill or two to her food.
And you may feel a growing fear deep within yourself,
which bodes of a coming emptiness.
And you will feel this uneasy feeling, on and off,
until the third day finally arrives.

And on this day — if your friend and God have not decided for you,
then you will be faced with making a decision of your own —
on behalf of your lifelong friend,
and with the guidance of your own deepest Spirit.
But whichever way your friend eventually leaves you —
you will feel as alone as a single star
in the dark night sky.
If you are wise, you will let the tears flow
as freely and as often as they must.
And if you are typical,
you will find that not many in your circle
of family or human friends
will be able to understand your grief, or comfort you.
But if you are true to the love
of the pet you cherished through the many joy-filled years,
you may find that a soul — a bit smaller in size than your own —
seems to walk with you, at times, during the lonely days to come.
And at moments when you least expect
anything out of the ordinary to happen,
you may feel something brush against your leg — very, very lightly.
And looking down at the place
where your dear, perhaps dearest, friend used to lie —
you will remember those three significant days.
The memory will most likely be painful,
and leave an ache in your heart —
As time passes the ache will come and go
as if it has a life of its own.
You will both reject it and embrace it,
and it may confuse you.
If you reject it, it will depress you.
If you embrace it, it will deepen you.
Either way, it will still be an ache.

But there will be, I assure you, a fourth day when —
along with the memory of your pet —
and piercing through the heaviness in your heart —
there will come a realization that belongs only to you.
It will be as unique and strong
as our relationship with each animal we have loved, and lost.
This realization takes the form of a Living Love —
Like the heavenly scent of a rose
that remains after the petals have wilted,
this Love will remain and grow—
and be there for us to remember.
It is a love we have earned.
It is the legacy our pets leave us when they go —
And it is a gift we may keep with us as long as we live.
It is a Love which is ours alone —
And until we ourselves leave,
perhaps to join our Beloved Pets —
It is a Love that we will always possess.

[labblab]

Dear, dear Leslie. Thank you so much for your own special words and also for this writing. It took my breath away when I read it. Writing can be a comfort to me, and at the time of the passing of Barkis, Peg and now Luna, I’ve tried to gather my special memories and write them down. With each, I sit and I cry and miss them so dearly. And to try to soothe myself, I’ve written a note to each one when they passed, listing all the things I never want to forget about them and thanking them. Any little special habit or memory that comes to my mind. And then any time, even years later, I can pull out the list and relive our time together, if only in memory and just for a moment. I’m not finished with Lunie’s list yet. I know I’m not near done with her list yet. I’ll keep adding for a while. But so far, each list starts with, “The first time I saw you.” And they each end with “The last time I saw you.” What a sad end to my otherwise sweet list. But this writing that you’ve shared gives me hope that maybe someday I can finally add one more line. One added line and one more day, the fourth day. And with Barkis, I think the fourth day has truly arrived. With Peg, I’m not there yet but perhaps drawing near. With Lunie, of course nowhere near. But hopefully some day yet to come.

I’ve been searching for some other meaningful writings, too, and here’s another one I just found today. Having no human children, and continuing to lose dear friends and family, it really struck a chord with me. I’ll add it here because maybe it will mean something to somebody else who stops by here, as well. We can ask so much of our furbabies. But they so willingly give us everything. How can we ever thank them enough.



Little Souls
By: Daryl Price

With clumsy legs and a silly heart,
They are asked to play the part
Of children when there can be none
Of our own, sweet daughter, or playful son.
When our hand is too firm our voice too cold,
They forgive us our sins and put love in our souls.

With sturdy legs and a willing heart,
They are asked to play the part
Of trusted friend with love to give
When too lonely seems our life to live.
With pleading eyes beneath a noble head,
Asking only for praise, or tattered bed.

With trembling legs and a trying heart,
They are asked to play the part
Of one who takes their last breath,
To willingly go before us in death.
They teach us how to live and die,
Never complaining, never asking why.
Tail slow to wag, purr too soft to be heard,
Their dying wish but one kind word.

With silent legs and a worn out heart,
They are asked to play the part
Of greeter to a better place,
Should our lives be so noble, so full of grace.

A long lost toy found beneath a chair,
Reminds us of how we used to care
For those of willing heart and sturdy legs,
At our tables who no longer beg.
For they have found a softer lap,
On which they wait while they nap,
With One who grants their souls to rest,
Souls indeed, because our Lord needs pets.

[Joan2517]

Both of these are so lovely. I copied them and have pasted them into a word doc to read again and again. When the time is right, I want my husband to read them. We got Doree's ashes back the other day and he keeps them in the chair with him. They spent the last couple of years like that since they've both been sick...

Marianne, I love the list idea...

[labblab]

Awww Joan, my heart goes out to your husband. How he must miss his little comfort dog. I so hope having her ashes next to him will continue to give him peace.

We’ve got Luna’s ashes back, too. Her big plastic crate is still in our living room. Don’t have the heart to move it yet because it was her favorite resting spot in the world. Her private little safe den. We removed the door a couple years ago so she could just go in and out at will. She’d nap in there for hours, and always ran there if she was scared or nervous about anything. We decided to put her tin of ashes in there as soon as we brought them home. I hope her spirit feels like she’s safely back home again, too. And can forever still come and go, whenever she wishes.

[Harley PoMMom]

Oh my goodness, both of those poems were just beautiful, brought tears to my eyes as I read them.

[Squirt's Mom]

I love the poem you found, Marianne! And the idea of writing down the things we most want to remember about our babies is just great. Over the years I have written many letters to Gia and Squirt and my dad but I burn them a few days later. In my mind I am sending the messages to them on the smoke. We can find ways to help grief sit a bit easier as we learn to carry it.

Hugs,
Leslie

[Tina]

Dearest Marianne,


I am beyond heartbroken to read this sad news about Luna. She was such a beautiful special girl and I know her loss is just devastating.


I haven’t been on the forum for many months, but you and my other family here are often in my thoughts. Frequently on a daily basis. I have thought of you both so much.


I mustered the courage to come here today to say that I had to let my precious baby Shelby go a little over 3 weeks ago. I am full on sobbing now after reading about Luna, so will need to come back to post on her thread. This is about all I can manage right now.


My dear friend, I fully understand the gut-wrenching pain of coming home to an empty house. I’m so incredibly sorry that you are suffering through it also. Many many warm hugs to you.


My most heartfelt sympathy and love to you and your husband. Ever on precious Luna, ever on.


Love,
Tina xo

[labblab]

Oh Tina! I’m so touched to see you here on Luna’s thread, but so deeply sorry about Shelby. I so hope you’ll indeed return to post more about Shelby when the time feels right to you. All our angels, Tina, all our babies are now angels! Barkis and Dakota and Jasper and Peg and Luna and now little Shelby. All our angels, finally all joined together now and forever.

And for sure, you and I are both joined together in these new losses. Two weeks for you, and yesterday was the two-month mark for me. I still look for Luna in all her favorite spots, and my heart still breaks every time I don’t see her. I’m sure the same is true for you. But it truly does comfort me to speak with my dear friends here, so seeing your post this morning is an unexpected and so-much-appreciated gift. As I say, please do come back to tell us more about Shelby so we can also join you in honoring her, and hopefully soothe your own heart, too, if even for only a few moments.

Sending my love and hugs flying to you across the miles, my dear friend.
Marianne

[Squirt's Mom]

Oh dear Tina,

As sad as it is to read of yet another baby flying free I am so glad you felt safe and comfortable to come home to us in the midst of your anguish. There is something sacred about this place. It holds soooo many stories of intense joy and abject agony, so much laughter and so many tears. Where else can we go to feel that many are by our sides who understand, who have walked this path with us before, and are still here holding out their hands to walk with us again.

I have no doubt your precious Shelby is with Jasper, Dakota, Luna, Peg, Squirt, Molly, Lulu, Apollo, Harley, and all the rest of our babies here. They were standing on the Bridge, tails wagging, waiting to greet her and show her the ropes. I know she is looking in on you very often as do her brother and sister. And we are here to look in on you. Any time you feel ready, we will be by your side as you tell what is on your heart.

Hugs and sympathies,
Leslie

[Tina]

Dear Marianne and Leslie,

Thank you both so much for the beautiful kind words. Marianne, when I read about Luna, I thought of exactly that – all of our babies are now Angels. And all together forever. I remember we lost Peg and Jasper within a few months of each other. And for me too, it has been almost 30 years since I have been dog-less. I can barely think about it much less write the words.

Every single thing you both wrote could not be more true. I am not surprised, as you all are the ONLY family/friends who truly understand the ongoing devastating depth of grief that I feel. The kind that those of us here all experience, and have experienced before. Leslie, this is absolutely a sacred place where I feel I have made lifelong friends. It is truly the only place I feel any shred of genuine comfort in my darkest moments and hours. Both in the past when I lost Jasper, and now. I was thinking of Squirt and your other Angel babies along with Molly Muffin, Flynn, Apollo, Buddy, Zoe, Lena, Lori's and Glynda's Angels too, and others. All there to greet Shelby along with Dakota, Jasper, and Marianne's babies. She might be having so much fun she won't have time to miss me.

Sadly, today is 15 years since I had to let Dakota go, so hard to believe. I just left her thread. Between her and Shelby I have been a mess today. I will definitely come back to write properly on Shelby's thread when I can. I miss her every second and am not able to distract myself from the crushing emptiness that is just everywhere.

Much love and hugs to you both,

Tina xo

[labblab]

It’s funny isn’t it, how the smallest things can trigger the biggest waves of remembrance. Right before Luna died, I had bought one of those big multi packs of individually wrapped American cheese. That was always my go-to with all the dogs, little pieces for meds, for training, just for little treats. There at the end when her appetite was so poor, I’d start each meal with a couple little pieces of cheese — just to prime the pump, I’d say to her. Then handful by handful, I’d offer her the rest of her food, sometimes with a little more cheese tucked in between. A little game we two shared, morning and evening, as I tried to get her to eat.

We’d only used a couple of those slices before she left us. Now, three months and many human sandwiches later, I’ve finally come to the end. I decided to have a grilled cheese today. I looked at that last slice and debated leaving it, but decided to go ahead. What good would come from leaving that cheese in the fridge? But now, of course I wish I’d left it alone because every time I’d pulled out a slice I’d think of her. And now that’s another connection gone. So silly, just a little piece of cheese. But I do so wish I’d left it alone now. I just didn’t realize what it would mean to have it gone.

[Joan2517]

Yes, the smallest things, dear Marianne. Just now before going to bed, I commented to hubby how cold the kitchen was and how much Gable loved to sleep on the floor because of it...a little piece of cheese, not silly at all.

Hugs, hugs and more hugs...

Love, Joan

[Harley PoMMom]

Huge and loving hugs from me too, dearest Marianne.

[Squirt's Mom]

aw, Marianne, I know what you mean. When Squirt had to leave I had just made a week's worth of her food. A few months later I decided it was time to get rid of it since it was no longer edible anyway. A batch made 14 packages for the week. I threw the whole bag away then an hour or less later I was outside digging it out of the trash. I kept 2 packages and they remain in the freezer to this day. I have pulled them out several times since to chunk them but simply cannot. It's silly but it's not. I did throw all her medical records away this week and have cried for days as a result. I stood over the open trash can outside at least a dozen times, tears just rolling but I didn't dig them out. They are gone. After almost a decade, they are gone. So, sweet friend, I will cry with you over cheese and paper and inedible food any time, any day, always.

Huge hugs,
Leslie

[mytil]

I know exactly what you mean Marianne.......it is always the little things and no it is not silly! I still have all of the meds from all my dogs stored away in the attic (yes I know crazy after 20 some odd years).....I simply cannot get rid of them and I have a gut punch thinking this is just one of my connection to them I cannot part with.
My ((((hugs))))
T.

[Budsters Mom]

It’s The wave of remembrance over little things, that is the hardest for me. I don’t think there’s a statue of limitations on this. I still have these waves with a heart dog I had as a child. I don’t think they go away. I totally understand. I still have treasures from all of my dogs that I have not been able to part with.

[labblab]

Many thanks to all of you, my dear friends, who’ve written to me. Almost four months now that Lunie has been gone but of course I still miss her every single day. There at the end, she could only make it out to our front yard for very short walks. But as hard as it was for her, she always made her way across the yard to our neighbor’s mailbox where there are flowers and roses planted. Sweet girl, she loved smelling those roses. Everything had been dormant through the winter since she left us. But the grass is greening up now in our lawn (“her” lawn), and the greenery is all budding at the mailbox (“her” mailbox). Seeing it brings both smiles and tears. Right now, it’s mainly pretty hard for me. But I hope — I know — that one day there’ll be more smiles. I think one of the biggest joys in my life has been learning to see the world through the eyes of my doggies. And once you’ve been privileged to see that view, your sight is forever changed. I’m guessing for as long as they’re at the mailbox, I’ll never stop seeing those roses through her eyes, too. I just wish, so much, she was still walking over there alongside me today. I know you guys understand.

[mytil]

I understand completely Marianne!!! There are really no hard casted instructions in life on dealing with this ----- sending you and Jim my healing (((((hugs)))))


Our hearts are still broken and there are so many holes in our life, our yard, everywhere. One day about a month ago, I told my husband today I am going to the shelter and volunteering to walk their dogs. Walked in and said I am here to walk the dogs and went through the orientation - (I soon realized they are incredibly understaffed with volunteers so Peter volunteered too (sitting with them in the play areas and doing very short walks) ----- imagine with his heart and AFIB?!?!? ---- a very big Blue nose pitty with an attitude has fallen in love with Peter.) I have not formally adopted any of them (not sure if I will), but I have developed special relationships with a lot of them, and training them basics ----- that is helping fill some of my holes and getting some adopted. It is a no kill shelter --- many have been abandoned or seized by animal control. There are a lot of dog walkers there but not near enough.

[labblab]

Oh Terry, what a blessing you and Peter are giving these dogs!! I know your loss of Cailey is still just as great as mine, and I’m so touched by what you’re doing at the shelter. I’ve thought about doing something similar, but I guess I am selfishly protecting my own heart out of fear that I’ll get too attached to so many dogs that can never all be mine. That is really selfish of me, and maybe I can work my way past that because there are numerous shelters in my area that are dying for volunteers. Anyway, good for you and Peter! You’re my heroes for the day ❤️❤️

[mytil]

Oh Marianne, it took many months for this to happen ---- I just woke up one morning and did it ---- I did not think about it before. Please do not feel bad ---- I know completely about protecting one's heart. It is so raw this feeling. I tell myself it was Cailey Bear, Cyda and Myclan who put this thought into my head that morning outta blue ----
It is not your time yet ---- your precious angels will tell you.
Love and hugs
T.

[gingerbread]

My heart understands your heart, Marianne. It has been 2 years and 2 months since Ginger passed and I am still selfish with my heart. It is protection mode. At 4 months there was no way I could have even thought about helping at a shelter. Every anilmal in need would remind me of Ginger and I would want to fix them all. I still feel that way. Any animal I see that looks lost wandering around, any pup that looks lonely sitting in a fenced yard.. I just want them to know love. I still have everything of Gingers, all her medication, all her vet bills, her old tags. Her collars. I did make bracelets out of a couple of her nylon collars. My husband and I wear them every day. As Terry said. Your angels will let you know when.
Big higs and much love. Colleen

[addy]

Oh Marianne,
I stopped by to see how you are doing and when I read your post, all I could think of was my favorite quote, “memories are the power to gather roses in the winter.”
I hope you forever gather Luna’s roses through every season, close your eyes and remember your beautiful, sweet girl.
Everyone here understands the pain, the loss, the memories. We hold you close to our hearts with much love always. Our constant, our reliable, our Marianne.
With much love,
Addy

[labblab]

To Addy and Colleen, much love heading straight back to you both. Thank you for your kind words. They really do help. So very much.

[labblab]

As hard as it is for me to believe it, a year has now passed since Luna left us. The first year gone, along with our sweetheart. There is a bit of peace in knowing that there are no more “firsts” left to endure. But there’s also a sadness in knowing there are no more “firsts” to endure — knowing that time will just continue to separate us from our joyful life together. But I’ll continue to repeat what I believe in my heart. That love is forever. Daddy and I love you, sweetheart Lunie, and we always will. To the moon and back, we love you, my Angel.

Your mom forever. ❤️

[Harley PoMMom]

Lots of loving hugs being sent your way, my dearest Marianne.

In Loving Memory of precious Luna ♥

[Joan2517]

The firsts are so hard...Gable's been gone two years now and Lena almost eight. Doree's first will be on New Year's Day. So many...

Hugs from me, too, Marianne...

[Squirt's Mom]

Many many hugs, sweet Marianne. Luna and Peg are looking down on you and sending you pounds of love knowing how hard this is for you. But they also remind you that this is just a phase - it won't last forever. My mantra remains...one day, one day I will hold my babies again...and so will you, precious friend. That is a HUGE first we have to look forward to.

Hugs,
Leslie

[mytil]

Sending tons of hugs Marianne!!!!
T.