Buddy, The Mighty Lizard Hunter - Suspected Pituitary Macro Tumor

[Budsters Mom]

Trish you are the 1000th post!!!! Wow!
No I have not eaten anything today. I have not been hungry, just numb. I did have a drink of water couple hours ago. I will normally eat in times of stress also, but this is a whole different kind of stress.

[Mel-Tia]

I know. It's so hard. We are never ready to let them go no matter what

[Mel-Tia]

I didn't eat either, couldn't get it down my throat. Just sat here wondering how it had all turned out like this

[Trish]

Woahhh I did not even realise that was coming up..... That 1000 is for.......

(((((((((((((((BUDDY)))))))))))))

[Trish]

Well as long as you are keeping your fluids up I am happy you are not going to dehydrate from tears and keel over :p

[doxiesrock912]

Virtual hugs Kathy.
Since we can't be there in person.

Please know that we are with you in all ways possible and that we truly care as you have cared for us during our difficult/scary times and sharing in the good times too.

Relish the good times and the great memories with Buddy. Our time on earth is short in comparison and you will see Buddy again.

In the meantime, it's time to take care of you now that Buddy is free.
Do what you need to do for yourself and reach out to us when you feel the need.

God bless you Kathy. You are amazingly strong, even if it doesn't seem that way now.

[Budsters Mom]

Yeah but he's not here to get it!

[Trish]

EEEK,,,,, I've broken the page :(

[Tina]

Kathy, I normally eat with stress too, but the complete opposite with severe stress. When I lost my Angel Lab Dakota, I couldn't eat for days. I was able to drink carnation instant breakfast mixed with milk, you might try that to protect your stomach, and get a bit of nutrition.

[Trish]

That's better.... you are though and we are remembering him tonight with lots of love xxx

[Tina]

Wow Trish, 1000th post. Yes Kathy, that is for you and Buddy!

[Budsters Mom]

Mel are you still there? I am worried about you too. This conversation is bringing up not too happy memories for you.:o are you okay?

[Mel-Tia]

Kathy you are too sweet, you don't have to worry precious

I am crying right with with you. You have a buddy shaped hole and I have a Tia shaped hole, am so glad you have something which smells of him, I don't have that.

[Budsters Mom]

Tina,
How is Jasper doing?

[Trish]

Awwww I just spotted your signature Kathy, so sweet to be in Buddy's blue colour... he always liked to wear those bright clothes!

[Budsters Mom]

He didn't really like to wear the clothes Trish, except for the shirts when he got cold. He was just so easy-going he let me do anything to him. He was the one that slept through his grooming/buzz, remember?

[Mel-Tia]

He was a cool customer (until he saw birds or lizards and then it was game on!)

[Trish]

That's right, he did too! That was amazing, the chilled out little guy.

[Tina]

Aww Kathy, you are so sweet to ask about Jasper. He is hanging in there for the most part. His water intake has increased quite a bit over the past few weeks so I am keeping an eye on that and hoping it is not related to his kidney issues. Still trying to get by with one middle of the night pit stop, but not sure how long that will last. Thanks so much for asking about him, I need to update his thread one of these days!

[Budsters Mom]

I am in my bed with my iPad. I got up to get something and turned the big light on, so I wouldn't step on Buddy. :(

[Trish]

Awwwww so hard, glad your in bed though.. what is the time there?

[Budsters Mom]

Mel, don't you have to go to work this morning? At least it's morning there! It is 12:45 AM here.

[Trish]

7.45pm here, so still early. Just have a wee job to do, back in 15mins xxx

[Mel-Tia]

I do, but am working from home today. Already logged on. I have my iPad to speak to you
Xxxx

[Tina]

Well girls, it is 2:55 am here and I need to try to get a bit more shut eye before getting up for work in a few hours. Sorry I have to go Kathy. Glad Trish and Mel can still stay with you now, and then the US morning crew will be along. More (((((hugs))))). Nite all.

[Mel-Tia]

I have to nip out in a bit but will be back later on.

Sending you much love

Mel

[Trish]

Hope you get some sleep Kathy, and that Buddy gives you a visit xxxxxxx

[labblab]

Morning crew has arrived. Is there any food left over :o? A bit too early for wine and fish 'n chips, but it is NEVER too early for chocolate!

OK, Kath, you've made it through the first night. Now we start in on the first day. Step by step by step.

[mytil]

Oh Kathy,

I am so very, very sorry! Saw this very sad news this morning (have been sporadic on site - working, working) Know that your sweetie pie will be watching over you always. And, so will we.

Big healing ((((hugs))))
Terry

[Budsters Mom]

I am here.

[labblab]

Were you able to get any sleep at all? I know it's really hard because when you do finally drift off, it's like you have to relive things all over again every time you wake up and remember.

I think first morning after was the very hardest time of all for me. Did not know how I could bear his absence and immediately started second-guessing everything I had done. That day is buried in my memory now, but it will never leave me. I will never forget.

Come and talk with us anytime you feel up to it, Kathy.

[Mel-Tia]

I am here also, no talking if you dont want to.

Mel
Xxxx

[bgdavis]

Kathy,

You don't know me, but I spent lots of time here from 2004-2009. "Buddy, the mighty Lizard Hunter" got my eye and I have followed his story. I can't tell you how sorry I am for your loss. Reading that he had crossed the Bridge this morning brought tears to my eyes. Poor little guy.

He's up there now and out of all pain. I'm sure a whole variety of lizards has been provided for his enjoyment.

Hugs during this terrible time.
Bonnie and Angel Criss Ann

[addy]

Hi Kathy,

I checked in around 5am but did not see your green light. I hope you dozed off for a bit.

[Budsters Mom]

I sent a short video clip to the Gmail account. I hope you can find a way to post it. It shows Buddy smiling on command. Thanks,

Kathy

[Budsters Mom]

It hurts just as much today.:(

[Budsters Mom]

I planned to spend my Summer vacation with Buddy. I put everything aside to enjoy what I thought would be our last summer together. I didn't even get that time with him.
Kathy

[labblab]

Oh Kathy, I just saw your video and OMG what a sweetie-pie!!

I've got to run out for a little while but I'll see if I can post it when I get back. I am very techno-challenged, though, so if I can't do it hopefully one of the other Admins can, or they will even do it while I'm away.

What a very precious little boy.

[Budsters Mom]

Thank you So much Marianne

[Mel-Tia]

Bless his cotton socks, he smiled on command. Would love to see that.

Sending you a big hug

Mel
Xxx

[Simba's Mom]

Hey Kathy, here too sending hugs and praying for peace....so glad you got his blanket that smells like him....

[Budsters Mom]

Mel,
I'm not sure if the administrators will be able to post the video clip of Buddy smiling. I would be happy to send it to you directly. Please send me your email address via PM and I'll forward it on. It's okay if you do not want to share your email address.

[Mel-Tia]

Course I will you silly one. Will send it to you in a bit. My Tara used to smile when she woke up and found me every morning. Used to warm my heart that she was that pleased to see me

[Squirt's Mom]

Dear, sweet Kathy,

After my daughter died I didn't want to live. I had no reason to live. She was the only person who really needed me and she was gone. Vibrant, beautiful, present one day, and gone the next. It felt like I was no longer needed by anyone. Every breath I took felt like a betrayal, like a cruel joke, like stealing. The few memories I have of the next two years aren't pleasant. One night I woke up on the couch with a butcher knife in my hands - I don't remember going to the couch nor getting the knife nor what my thoughts were, tho I am pretty sure what my intent was. I don't know what stopped me that time or any of the other times. But something kept my hands stilled - and that also felt like betrayal, a cruel joke, stealing. I had no right to draw breath when my child no longer could. I had utterly failed her on every level.

Buddy is your child just as much as Gia is mine. You are a mother who has lost her baby boy and there is no pain like this in the whole world, none. It is incomprehensible, incomparable, and indescribable to those who have never lived through it....and you will live through it just as I have. You will face those "firsts" as they come with terrible anticipation, fear and anguish - then cry when they pass with fresh pain. Then you will face those "seconds" with a tiny bit more ease, and the "thirds" and the "fourths" and on and on and on. At some point, you will look through your tears and see Buddy looking back at you - and you will know he has never really left, that he has been by your side the whole time, just waiting for you to be able to see him. You may see him as white feathers floating down around you from nowhere, or a bloom on a bush that shouldn't yet be blooming and you will know it is your sweet boy showing himself to you, telling you that he is alright now and that he loves you as much as ever - that he needs you to keep fighting as much as ever. And, as impossible as it is to believe today, that he is grateful to you for taking his pain, confusion, and fear away, for sparing him the horror that was to come, for giving him freedom from his failing vessel.

For now, you grieve as you need and let us grieve with you. Let our tears mingle with yours, let our prayers rise with yours, let our strength and hope sustain you. In the mingling, we honor Buddy's life, we honor Gia's life, we honor the lives of all those we love and have lost. We need you, Kathy, as much as you need us right now and we will not leave you now or ever.

Our deepest sympathies,
Leslie, Squirt, Trinket, Brick, Sophie, and our Angels, Ruby, Crystal, Tasha and Josie


"On this side of The Bridge, time is painful, but it gives me a chance to live and love on."
Jeanne, Kiska’s Mom

[Trixie]

Any sleep at all for you Kathy? I hope you managed to doze a bit or at least just rest in bed. I see the nighttime duo Mel and Trish were there to help get you through.
Today won't be easy, that's for sure.
I keep looking at all Buddy's photos..and showed them to my girls who also shed some tears.
I can't eat at all when I feel terribly sad so I can understand that you don't feel like having anything...but I agree with an earlier post..(was it Marianne's?) who suggested Carnation instant breakfast... a yogurt or a milkshake...just something that will give you a little bit in your stomach.
I would love to see the video of Buddy. Do you still have my email?
Thinking of you Kathy...I know you are feeling lonely...
everyone is here for you...
Barbara

[lulusmom]

Dear sweet, Kathy, I am just seeing this sad news this morning and I want to tell you how incredibly sorry I am for your loss. My heart aches for you. Buddy was so incredibly fortunate to have you for a mom....you knew him like the back of your hand and he knew that you would know when he was ready to be released from his pain. You made one of the most selfless decisions we parents ever have to make in our lifetime. I realize that it's of little consolation at this moment, but please know that many, if not all of us, know the pain you are in right now and also know that only time will bring you relief.

The Budster is gone from the physical world but he will be with you always, as will your k9c family. Don't ever forget that you are not alone...we are here for you and we will always remember and honor your precious Buddy.

Godspeed sweet Buddy, The Mighty Lizard Hunter.

((((Big Consoling Hugs))))

Glynda

[addy]

How did you teach Buddy to smile on command? That is amazing.
I looked at your albums last night. The pictures are so dear and precious.

[labblab]

Hey Kathy, I'm back and I don't think I can attach your video in its present storage form. But maybe one of the other staffers can figure out a way to convert it to an uploadable form. So stay tuned...

[doxiesrock912]

Checking in on you Kathy. I hope that you got some sleep.

[molly muffin]

Good morning :) awww, I want to see the smiling Buddy. I bet that is real cute.

Sending you lots of big hugs Kathy
Sharlene and Molly Muffin

[Mel-Tia]

Am floating still. Work is being a pain but still around

[Budsters Mom]

Thank you all so much ladies.

Leslie, your message was so perfect. You always know exactly the right thing to say. It cut to my very core. :o

Addy, I didn't teach Buddy to smile. :)He smiled at everyone from the time he was a very small puppy. Strangers would think he was a vicious, but the truth was he was just smiling.:) He was very easy to train because he was very smart and always aimed to please. He had an extensive vocabulary. I commented on his smile every time I was blessed enough to get one, which was many times a day. He finally associated the word smile with what I wanted him to do.

Regarding the smile video... Administrators may not be able to post it because it's not in the proper format for the forum. I will send it to anyone that requests it. If you'd like to see the video, please send me a PM with your email address. Yes Barbara, I still have yours and will send it shortly.

Big hugs Angels,

[Budsters Mom]

Buddy was always terrified of the sounds of fireworks,thunder and firecrackers. I would sit with him on the bathroom floor for hours with the fan going, so he couldn't hear those sounds. I would cuddle him and talk to him and he would remain calm as long as I was in there with him. This will be the first Fourth of July in 10 years that I have not sat in the bathroom with him for most of the night. I could actually go see the fireworks this time, but I don't want to. I just want Buddy back so we can sit out the fireworks together.:(

[labblab]

My Barkis always shed horribly, just like Peg and Luna do now. I would always complain about all the fur that went flying around the house. After he left us, I didn't vacuum for days and days and days. I couldn't bear for that remembrance to be gone, too. And I wondered through my tears why on earth I had ever complained.

It's amazing how the sacrifices aren't really sacrifices at all, isn't it? And how expectedly we discover all the nooks and crannies of our hearts that totally belong to our babies.

[addy]

Awww Kathy, you have a first holiday so soon, that just isnt fair.:(:(
I understand why you would not want to go see fireworks. Did your neighbors fire them off too? Ours used to, hubby would get upset because one year one landed on our roof:eek::eek:

[Budsters Mom]

My whole life was centered around Buddy's schedule even when I worked. I had to get home to let him out because he could no longer get out the doggie door anymore and wouldn't have an accident in the house. I had to be around for several small meals a day due to the hypoglycemia. Then there was meds and allergies. There was this little guy who really needed me. We needed each other. And now he's gone.

I forced myself to go out and do some errands today because my folks needed a few things. One of the stores I went and had Buddy crackers on sale. There was a sign up on the end of one of the aisles. Are you kidding me? I went to the pet store to return unopened dog food. Buddy specialty allergy formula costs over $60 a bag. The canned formula that I have been mixing with his SEB cost almost 3 dollars per can. I had some of those to return also. I broke down and cried when I had to tell the checker why I was returning food. I had receipts, why did I have to tell her?

[Budsters Mom]

Yes Addie, the kids in the neighborhood shoot firecrackers most of the night. They terrorized Buddy so much more then the big fireworks a few miles away. Dang kids! Having said that I used to shoot off firecrackers when I was a kid.I never even thought that I might be upsetting any pets. The kids probably don't realize it either or just don't care.

[Trish]

Hi Kathy
I am up getting ready for work, I usually have a rule not to log on here in the mornings or I end up late!! But a later start this morning and I have made an exception as I wanted to check how you are doing... glad you are here talking to everyone. xxx

[Budsters Mom]

Hi Trish don't let me make you late for work.:p

[Boriss McCall]

Oh No!!! I have not been on the board in a little while. You have been thru so much. It makes my heart hurt for you. I am so sorry that Buddy is gone. He was such a great dog & you are such an awesome mommy.
Hugs to you. I know this is going to be such a difficult time for you. I am so sad.

RIP Buddy, The Mighty Lizard Hunter... I hope you are chasing all the lizards you can see in heaven.

[Trish]

Haha I usually do a pretty good job of being late myself!! Maybe that sign was a sign in itself?!?! We have fire cracker night on Nov 5th, they are on sale for a few days prior. Then you cannot buy them the rest of the year. I hate how they upset our pets too. Everyone seems to make sure they last with the blardy things getting set off for days, week and sometimes right up to New Years. But yes you are right, we did as kids without a thought to the pets. Every year there are calls to ban them and just have public displays as so many kids getting maimed with burns, or even eye injuries but they have not succeeded yet. Buddy gets to see them from up above this year without all the horrible bangs scaring him!!

[Budsters Mom]

Fireworks/firecrackers are banned for sale in California. However, they are easily smuggled over state lines or brought in from Mexico. The only ones that legal are public displays. That doesn't stop every kid in the neighborhood from shooting off firecrackers all night!

[khockman]

We hide from fireworks in our house too! I am sure for a long time you will see reminders of Buddy, but that is only because he is sending you reminders of his love for you and reminders that there are so many of us out here that need you and all that Buddy has taught you. I had such a happy moment when I watched Buddy's video...I fell in love instantly! Stay strong!

xoxox,
Kerry (Millie's Mama)

[Budsters Mom]

Trish,
I will send you the video now of smiling Buddy.:)

[Trish]

OMG HOW ADORABLE!!! I think Buddy would have done handstands if you had asked him to get those treats :D:D:D Awwwww I am off to work with a smile on my face to match that grinning Buddy, thanks for sending it Kathy, so precious :) See you tonight sweet xxxx

ps have a little snack and a drink won't you... :rolleyes: (can't help myself sorry!)

[Budsters Mom]

Don't let them work you too hard Trish. What are you bringing home for dinner? Isn't it Thursday where you are? It should be fresh fish tonight! Yum! I could actually eat a little bit of that!:)

[goldengirl88]

Kathy:
I watched Buddy's video over and over again. How cute and precious he was on there, what a star. I am so glsd you have video of him. I try to take some of Tipper every day.That is a funny thing about the fireworks. Tipper can tell the difference between them and thunder, I guess by the atmospheric pressure before the thunder. She never winces during the fireworks. I sent for some treats from Vetri Science called Composure, for when it rains. My vet suggested Rescue Calming Remedy, the reviews were good, but it has too much alcohol in it so I got the other brand. I basically got Tipper to lay down most of the day, to get her pressure down. I am missing the posts by you on what Buddy would be doing. This is a crushing blow to the group, but I can't and don't want to imagine how you are feeling. You can send the white van and the little white men to come get me after they leave your house. Somehow we need to get people together to stamp out this disease. Blessings
Patti

[Fellasmom]

Kathy
I haven't been on here in awhile and was so shocked to hear about Buddy.My heart breaks for you and the tears are flowing.Hearing of you holding his frog and blanket broke my heart.Its been 2 months now for me and I still can't walk by the dog hooks without closing my eyes and breathing in Fella's scent from his collar and winter coat.We all know what you are going through and you are never alone.I too felt like my babies were all I had in my life and so few understand that.Your love for Buddy led you here and I do think that is their final gift to us.Love,support and friendship literally from around the world 24/7-an amazing gift that I am forever grateful for.My heart is with you and so saddened to hear about your precious Buddy.
Love,
Patty

[Budsters Mom]

Thank you all! Patty, I hope the Three Musketeers are doing well!:)

Scented candles/warmers...I have always loved them. The food kind not the flowery kind. I have found them to be very soothing. When Buddy joined the family as a pup, I soon found out that he was full of allergies which could trigger asthma. I stopped burning candles or spraying anything smelly in the house. I probably had more than 20 large jarred scented candles at that time. I always get candles for gifts, particularly from the kids at school for various occasions. 10 years have passed. The candles have kept coming. I have continued to store them away. I thought about them today and opened my cedar chest in my bedroom. I counted 64 jarred candles. I then went to a spare bedroom. In that closet, in a box, there were another 30 plus jarred scented candles. If I burn candles every day for the rest of my life, I will never burn all of those candles, more less any others. It is weird the changes we make for our babies and we don't even mind.:o

[Mel-Tia]

No, we love them so much. I don't think we even really notice

Just wanted to let you know I am back, work became very nuts. Still doing bits, have no idea how I will get it all done before Friday when everyone keeps asking me things!

Sending you a hug
Mel
Xxxxx

[Budsters Mom]

Maybe I shouldn't ask you anything then.

[goldengirl88]

Kathy:
I would get out a bunch of the candles and light them all in honor of Buddy. Blessings
Patti

[Budsters Mom]

Mel,
why don't you go ahead and go to bed. You were up really late with me last night and then had to work today again. There's enough angels around here to check in on me. Of course they are not you, but they are pretty great!;):)

[Budsters Mom]

Yes Patti,
I have already lit one of the candles as a tribute to Buddy. I can't lite a bunch of them because they are all scented. That would be an aroma nightmare and not much of a tribute.;)

[Mel-Tia]

I don't think I would be able to sleep. It was quite bizarre this morning I woke up at 07:00 our time exactly bolt upright like someone had poked me!

I want to stay here, I think we all become so attached to each others pups, it's comforting to me to know we are here together even if we aren't together

Ps -I didnt mean you asking things, work actions you can ask and talk to me whenever we are friends, these lot I am talking about are not!

[Budsters Mom]

I just don't want you to think that you have to stay out of some sense of duty. If you want to stay, that's great!:) xxxxx

[Mel-Tia]

I never do anything in my own time I don't want to!

I won't be here after Saturday for 2 weeks. Not sure how I will go without knowing how you all are!

[Budsters Mom]

You need the break Mel. Go and have a wonderful time! That is an order!:D Yes I will miss you, but I want you to go.:) xxxxx

[Mel-Tia]

I am looking forward to not working. Have a gazilioon things to pack yet. None of that done tonight. Can't be arsed to move now :D

[Mel-Tia]

Sent you my address so I can see the little smiler xxx

[Roxee's Dad]

Stopping by to give you a big cyber (((HUG))) Kathy.

[Budsters Mom]

Thank you for the hug John.:)

Mel,
I sent you the video of the little smiler. Check your email:):D let me know what you think.

[Mel-Tia]

Thanks babe. I got it but can't open it on my pad.. Gives me a black screen and a video icon with a line in it. Will need to use my computer...

[Budsters Mom]

I will try again now. If it should work. I am sending it from my iPad. I have sent about 10 others out with no problem let me try again

[Budsters Mom]

I sent the video again. It worked on this side. When you get it on your iPad tap the little video icon and it should come up to view. If that doesn't work hold it down and add it to your photos, then try to open it there. No one else has had a problem.:o

[Budsters Mom]

I sent to Trish in New Zealand without any problem. it's certainly should be able to get to London.;)

[addy]

I dont know why but your comment about the aroma nightmare brought a grin to my face. I could so smell that:)

Patty, it is a gift that we were all brought together, why I could not imagine my life without you all. How is Romeo?

Mel- may I ask where you are going? I can look it up on a map:)

[Mel-Tia]

It's my pad not yours. QuickTime error.. I will look on computer first thing. As I do want to see smiler x

Getting a bit sleepy now so will say night in case I fall asleep, will check in when I am up in case you are.

Big hugs

Love
Mel
Xxxxx

[Budsters Mom]

There should not be a line through the video icon. This sucks!

[Budsters Mom]

Good night now. Please let me know if you were able to see the video.xxxxxx

[Mel-Tia]

I will be back prob midnight your time so will defo let you know..

Mel
Xxxxxx

[Budsters Mom]

Go to bed Mel. Luv ya! Xxxxx

[Mel-Tia]

Ok night xxx

[Trixie]

Kathy,
I just watched the video...oh my goodness is that smile not the cutest thing ever!? Buddy's smiling with all the teeth...so, so adorable. We loved seeing him...so glad you sent it.
How have you been holding up? Were you able to eat a little something? I hope so...I know this is just the hardest thing. I keep thinking about you Kathy...
Barbara

[scoora]

Kathy,
I am so very sorry to hear about Buddy. It is so hard to lose them. Every little thing right now sets me off.
I am not good with words like others here but I want you to know you are in my thoughts and prayers.
I hope Scoop has found himself a new "Buddy" to run and play with.
HUGS

[Budsters Mom]

Barbara,
I'm not really holding up. I'm just barely holding on. I'm not sure if I'm eating. I might've nibbled on something this morning, but I don't remember. The last 30 or so hours since Buddy passed have been a blur. I'm glad that you enjoyed Buddy's smile video. Xxxxxxx

[Budsters Mom]

Your words are perfect Vicki.:) I'm sure Tia has been giving Buddy and Scoop the lay of the land. Big hugs,

[frijole]

Ah man I feel so bad for being gone during all of this... just spent some time reading the many pages of love and sadness. I'm at a total loss for words. I just know you did the right thing because you know your little guy better than anyone. But oh how it tears at the heart. I so understand. I live alone and when I lost Annie she was all I had and while my family didn't understand really - they knew to leave me alone so I could mourn. This forum was a saving grace once again for me.

Know you are loved and part of the family here - Buddy is now with many of our own angels. Haley and Annie spent many years chasing lizards down in Florida when we lived there and I bet money they cornered Buddy already to show him the ropes up there. Not just lizards but food, treats, toys - they got his back.

Meanwhile we got yours. Sending love and strength. Kim

[Budsters Mom]

I'm sending the video now Letti. It has worked for everyone but mel. She's going to have to try to see it on her computer because she couldn't get it to work with her iPad. If it doesn't go through and me a message and I'll try it again.xxxx

I have had requests from several members. All have been able to view it so far but Mel.

[Simba's Mom]

So I was driving through a small town today and I saw a lady walking a dog, and guess who it looked like? Your precious Buddy, I almost stopped to say hi, but I didn't, it really is true how close we all are with our pups and how they come to our mind so often, still praying!

[Budsters Mom]

Letti,
I am going to take a hot bath. I need to feel something. I strained my lower back today moving things around that I shouldn't have been moving by myself. I'll check in after my bath and see if the video came through for you. Please let me know if you are unable to view it.
Xxxxxx

[Simba's Mom]

I have to go to my big computer too, got to see your precious angel...

[Budsters Mom]

I know you understand Kim. This is the only place I have where anybody does. Xxxxxxxx

[doxiesrock912]

Kathy, I would LOVE to see Buddy's smiling video :)
That sounds so adorable! I'll send you my email address in a private message.

I have only known one other dog who smiled when he greeted people. His name was "Barney". It's just something they do and I wonder if they see us doing this and they copy? They're certainly smart enough.

[Budsters Mom]

Valerie I'm off to take a bath. Send me your email address address in a PM and I will send you the video soon as I get out. thanks xxxxxx

[Trixie]

A hot bath sounds like a good idea Kathy.
Have to go take care of my mother tomorrow...caregiver has the 4th off. I will check back in with you when I return.
I didn't expect you to be holding up really...I know what a heartbreak this is.
Hope you can get a little bit of sleep tonight.
Barbara

[Budsters Mom]

Valerie,
You sent me a PM but it doesn't have an email address?:confused: I need one to send you the video. Thx

[doxiesrock912]

I did Kathy :) My brain is mush this week.
It can certainly wait until you take your bath.

[Budsters Mom]

I sent It Valerie. Let me know if you got it. I'll wait before I get my bath and see.

[doxiesrock912]

I have it Kathy. For some reason, I can hear the sound but the picture doesn't show. I will play with various programs to find the compatible one.

I may have to consult with my fiance when he wakes up tomorrow so please don't wait.


Please take your bath :)

[Simba's Mom]

AW that is soooo precious, what a total package Buddy is, I bet he is teaching other furbabies to smile in Heaven, good things the treats are never ending!!!! Enjoy your bath hon!!

[Budsters Mom]

Valerie, it came through for Letti. I'm going to try to send it to you again now.

[doxiesrock912]

Kathy!
OMG! That is the most precious video EVER!!!!! I smiled and laughed.

For anyone who can't get it to play on your Windows PC; download the free Quicktime player http://www.apple.com/quicktime/download/

Follow the prompts and if you get an error message about restoring files that may be associated with other programs, click yes.
Then click on file at the top left of your screen with Quicktime open and you can open the video there.

Windows Media player doesn't play movies with .MOV at the end :)

Thank you so much for sharing Kathy :)

[Budsters Mom]

I am so glad that it came through for you Valerie. I'm sitting here in the bathtub with my iPad hanging over the edge. I'm going to go ahead and finish my bath now. I am glad that you liked it! Hugs,

Kathy

[Budsters Mom]

Valerie,
It is great to know how you got it to work. I will tell Mel if she is still unable to get it to play on her computer. It wasn't coming through on her iPad. You're very welcome Valerie. Buddy was a joy who should be shared.xxxxxx

[doxiesrock912]

funny story Kathy. I am a banker/Project Manager by profession, but learning how to use different programs or solving problems like this is fun for me.

I know, "get a life" - LOL
It's no wonder I'm engaged to a Senior Database Analyst :)

He's MILES more geeky than I am.

[Budsters Mom]

I'm glad that it worked for you Valerie. Being able to share Buddy through the video is helping me feel a little less alone.xxxx

[doxiesrock912]

Awww:) I'm so glad that sharing is helping Kathy :)
What a wonderful tribute to Buddy.

Time for bed. I have a long day of driving tomorrow. Grandpa will be critter sitting for me.

I think that he spoils Daisy when I'm not watching because she's been insisting that he go on walks WITH us lately. If it looks as though he isn't following, she looks behind her and stares at him until he gives in!

I hope that you get some much needed rest tonight.
HUGS

[Budsters Mom]

:eek:Grandpa doesn't feed her things that she shouldn't have, does he? You don't need the diarrhea starting up again! Hugs to Miss Daisy. Tell her no more growling and showing her teeth at you, That is not ladylike!:D xxxxx

[doxiesrock912]

Grandpa finally understands the seriousness of Cushings and how easy it is to throw Daisy's digestive tract off. He had to clean up copious amounts of diarrhea the last time that I was away :)

Daisy has always had a soft spot for my father. As you know, most dogs recognize good people right away.

She showed her teeth the other night and I let her be. No messes at all in the morning so apparently she really didn't have to go:) The heat has really been bothering her and we've had to lower the Trilo to 5mg twice a day due to lethergy and not eating.

Thankfully, the IMS responds to emails really quickly and she is in full agreement. I just hope that the lower dosage is enough to be effective.

[Budsters Mom]

You sure are having a hard time getting Daisy regulated.:o But at least, the IMS is available to you by email easily enough.:)

[Trish]

Hi Kathy

I am home :) You were right, it is fish n chip night here!! Terakihi this week, very tasty it was too. Hope your in bed snoozing, you know I will be here though if you wake xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

[Budsters Mom]

I am still up Trish. Congrats on Flynny's anniversary:)

[Trish]

Thanks sweet! He had some of the fresh fish tonight, he loved it. Mum wanted me to give her cat Elle her worming pill... it is quite big and the last time the vet popped it in her mouth and swallowed it and it was gone. It looked very easy. But god what a performance tonight, I put her on top of their chest freezer wrapped in a towel with my niece holding her paws, amazing how long the that blardy cat could persevere without swallowing, soon as I loosened my grip n her snout even slightly she would spit it out. Once she sent it flying behind the freezer, Jade my niece retrieved it and we had to wash the fluff off of it :D:D tried a different tactic, crushed it up with some fresh fish and popped that in her mouth, held her little jaw shut but everyone made me give up when she started foaming at the mouth!!! It was just her saliva mixed with the fish/worm ball. I was very careful not to choke her but the family thought I was being extremely cruel... honestly none of them would manage a sick animal like we all can!!

So it ended like this....... Elle 1: Trish 0.

She has to go to the vet apparently as he can do it more humanely than me! I told Mum she should get the paste stuff and we can put it on her paws to lick off. Phew, am exhausted but amazingly no scratches!!

[Trish]

Oh and did I mention Siamese have teeth like snaggletooth blardy tigers, man they are big AND sharp!!

Once she got away from me, she went and gave Flynn a swipe.. the little witch :mad:

[Trish]

So he stole her fish :D:D:D:D:D

[Trish]

Hmmm my story must have put you to sleep :) I am glad, sweet Buddy dreams Kathy! It's all quiet here tonight. Will see you tomorrow, then its the weekend yay!! xxxxxx

[Jenny & Judi in MN]

Buddy was a doll. I know on the diabetes forum we've commented how much closer we get to our pups who need extra care. I'm so sorry. hugs, Judi

[addy]

Stopping by with hugs Kathy.

[Scarlett'sdad]

Kathy, it is wonderful that you take care of your parents. I know that can be stressful as I took care of my mother who had Alzheimer's, which made her a very difficult person to help. So sorry for your loss. I am sure Yorkie Buddy is giving Silky Scarlett some lizard hunting lessons!

[Mel-Tia]

Hi you

I watched his video what a little precious he was and then barking at you to give him some more treats little cheeky one.

Hope you are as ok as you can be today

Sending tight hugs

Mel
Xxxxx

[Budsters Mom]

Hi Mel,
I'm glad that you got a chance to view Buddy's video. Sharing the video with all of you has helped me feel a little less alone.xxxxx

It is a very lonely holiday without my mighty lizard hunter. No cuddles or belly rubs. No reason to get out of bed. I miss him soooooo much!

[Mel-Tia]

He was such a sweet looking little guy. Spunky too from the seems of it.

Of course, he was your little pal who loved you no matter what was going on.

[Budsters Mom]

I need to rub him and look into his eyes. I can't ever do that again! It is going to be a very sad, lonely holiday.

[Tina]

Kathy, stopping in to check on you. I don't have big plans today, so will be in and out of the forum. So you won't be alone. I know how hard a holiday can be, especially coming this soon.

I decided to just stay home, the fireworks have been bad this year already so I am sure all my neighbor kids will be out in full force this afternoon and tonight. They were going off well past 1 am this morning already. I used to love all the fireworks, but now I hate them because Jasper gets so anxious.

I just looked at all Buddy's pics again, what an adorable little boy. I would love to see the video too Kathy, do you just need me to pm you my email?

Big hugs,
Tina

[Mel-Tia]

Sucks

It's not a holiday here and I don't think I will be capable of doing much more work today after last nights late night so I will be here lurking if you want to talk or if you don't

Xxxxx

[Budsters Mom]

Yes Tina,
I have sent the email to at least 15 members already. All you have to do is send me a PM with your email address and I'll send the video back to you. Our administrators were not able to load it onto the forum. XXXXX

[Tina]

Ok, just sent you a pm.

Mel, almost time for your vacation, isn't it? :)

[IWALY]

Im new and was not here following your journey, but I am sending you love and support at this time. ( Ive just read though all of your thread, you were a good mom to your baby <3 )

[Budsters Mom]

I sent the video Tina. Please let me know if you received it.;)

[Fellasmom]

Hi Kathy
Just checking in and sending lots of love your way.It sucks being alone-I often wish we all lived a little closer to one another.I would love to see Buddy's video as well-I will PM my email address.
Love,
Patty

[Budsters Mom]

Hi Waly's Mom,
I sincerely hope that you did not read through ALL of my thread, as there is more than 1100 posts! :eek::eek: If you did, all I can say is WOW!!!!!! Thank you so much for doing that and for you sweet note of support. Xxxxxxx

[Budsters Mom]

Hi Patty,
Thank you for checking on me today. Please PM me when you are ready and I will send the video on to you. Love to you and the Three Musketeers.xxxxxx

[Tina]

Aww Kathy, I just watched it 3 times in a row and I am just all choked up. How precious, I have never seen a pup smile on command like that!! He has such sweet ways just like my Jasper. How lovely that you were able to get such a wonderful video. My pups do not like their picture taken, so I have to be very sneaky. I don't have anything nearly as wonderful as this. Hugs Kathy.

[Budsters Mom]

Thanks Tina, it helps me to be able to share Buddy with all of you. Also, thank you for your show of support and for letting me know that you're going to be around today. It is such a hard time.xxxxxxx

[Budsters Mom]

I sent you the video Patty. Let me know if you were able to view it.

[Fellasmom]

OMG Kathy-absolutely adorable-what a cutie pie!!When was this taken?He looks like a puppy.I love that smile of his!!Thanks for sharing your Buddy with us-great way of spreading the love!
Love,
Patty

[Budsters Mom]

Patty,
The video was taken a couple of months ago. I knew that Buddy was not doing well and I wanted to capture his smile on video, so it would always be with me.

[Fellasmom]

What a beautiful memory Kathy!!I can't believe it was only a few months ago as he looks like a little baby pup in the video.I cherish the videos and pics of my Fella as well.You better eat soon-you're going to have Mama Trish after you!:).Hugs and thanks for sharing-Buddy is loved and I'm sure is chasing lizards as we speak!
Love,
Patty

[Budsters Mom]

Mel, Are you there? I hope you are packing! Wherever you are going sounds better than where I am. I am on summer break without a fur baby. May I go with you? :o Joking of course, but it does sound great! I would love to get away for a little while. I never went anywhere that I couldn't take Buddy with me. He was an awesome traveler. He was happy to go anywhere, as long as he could be with me.xxxxxx

[goldengirl88]

Kathy:
Just wanted you to know I am thinking of you and precious Buddy. Blessings
Patti

[khockman]

Hi Kathy,
Just wanted to check-in and say hello! I know that today will be a tough day for you and just wanted you to know I have oodles of hugs being sent your way...hope you get them. By the way, I shared the video with my husband and I have not seen him laugh so hard in awhile. We have a friend that had a dalmatian, and she scared the heck out of me cause she did something similar, but it was not on the command of "smile." I always thought she was going to eat me! Buddy is really making his mark with all of us...Miss Millie sends her love to you as well - as I talk to her and tell her about all the wonderful people I have met!

I think Buddy's smile could go viral on YouTube ;)

xoxox,
Kerry

[Budsters Mom]

Hi Kerry,
Yes, I received your hugs. Thank you!:) I'm thrilled that your husband got a kick out of Buddy's smile video. It is all about sharing Buddy with all of you. He would have loved making your husband laugh. He wasn't much interested in toys except for a favorite stuffed frog that he had since he was a puppy. "Froggy" was not a toy. He was his friend. At bedtime, I would tell him to go find froggy and he would come back with him and be ready for bed. Froggy was almost as big as Buddy and it was funny to watch him carry him around. Buddy was a people pup not a toy pup. He loved everyone, the mailman, the UPS man, solicitors, he didn't care. Anyone who came to our house for any reason, were there to see Buddy. That is what he lived for. Xxxxxx

[Simba's Mom]

Hey Kathy, I see you on here helping so many others when you are grieving your precious Buddy, yes you are an angel too, thank you from the bottom of my heart just for being you!

[khockman]

Kathy - Every time you talk about Buddy all I think of is how blessed Buddy was to have you in his life. How many poor puppies are unwanted, uncared for, and unloved...just heartbreaking. When you mention his frog, it makes me think of my other Bulldog Porter who only has one toy he will play with...and guess what it is called..."Buddy Ball." It is a glow-in-the-dark yellow squishy ball just the right size for him. 3 years ago the company DISCONTINUED the Buddy Ball and another company picked it up but did NOT make it the same...Porter rejected all imitations. So what did we do...we scoured the internet and every dog store within a large radius (had relatives in other cities do it as well), and cleared them out of the Original Buddy Balls. Yes I am crazy, but I had a stock pile of about 20 and he gets a new one every birthday and at xmas.

I love how Buddy was such a people person. I almost just picture him telling you to relax on the couch and he will get he door when people come over...too cute!

More hugs to you!
Kerry

[Tina]

Kathy,
I need to do a few things so will be away from the forum for a bit. Thanks for your post on Jasper's thread - yes, I have spent many a 4th in the bathroom with the door shut, fan and radio going! It does seem to help some. But it sounds like they shoot off cannons most of the night here, and that vibrates through the whole house, ugh!

I will be back later to keep you company, just need to get some things done. And my iPad is almost out of juice, need to charge it up.

Big hugs. xoxo

[Mel-Tia]

Just checking in...

Been doing a bit of packing as I won't have much time tomorrow

Sending a hug
Mel
Xxxx

[labblab]

Hi Kathy,

Whew, this is the first chance I've had to do any posting today. I've been busy since my hubby, mom and I decided that if there was any chance at all for us to have grilled ribs for the holiday, we needed to plan for mid-day. It has been a very soggy couple of days with yet more rain to come. But we had a mid-day "window" and just enough time to fix our lunch. Now we can relax, and probably we may thankfully be spared a lot of the neighborhood firecrackers since the rain is supposed to move back in soon.

I've just been thinking, and is there any chance at all that you might change your mind and actually go to see the fireworks tonight? I know you don't feel like it, but you just never know what life holds in store. And maybe this chance to see some sparkle and shimmer would actually lift your spirits rather than dim them. I do not think it would be disloyal to Buddy, even though it might seem that way at first. I've been reading some stuff on grieving myself, and one thing I was struck by was a piece that said that it's OK to feel OK for little snatches of time, even when your heart is broken. It doesn't mean you are missing your loved one any less. But it is OK to comfort yourself by allowing moments of joy or pleasure even though they may be few and far between. So the fireworks are just a thought, which of course you can totally ignore!!

Either way, I'm sending plenty more hugs your way.
Marianne

[goldengirl88]

Kathy:
Just thinking of you and Buddy. Just know Tipper and I are praying for you both. Blessings
Patti

[Budsters Mom]

I am in a whole lot of trouble now!:eek::eek::eek: I was browsing the local ads on-line and found two Yorky Poo pups who need a home. The father is a pure bred Yorky. The mother is a pure bred miniature poodle. The lady I called has the male. Her friend a few doors down, has the pup's mother. I could visit both of them to check out the looks of their health and temperment. She lives about 10 minutes from me. The pups are eight weeks old and are ready to find a forever home. The owner of the male manages an apartment complex. She needs to get rid of the puppies quickly. They are being sold dirt cheap, only $200. Far less than the price of an ACTH test! It doesn't look good for the manager to have more than one dog as it breaks the rules of the complex. It is too soon to get another puppy. I only lost Buddy 2 days ago, although it seems like months. My folks who live with me are grieving too. They would never accept another puppy this early. I don't think they want another one ever! Then there is the safety issue. My folks are always dropping pills. I'm on Summer break until the first of September. I would have plenty of time to acclimate a new puppy and to get it potty trained. Distressed more... I should have stayed away from those dang ads!!! It sucks, bad timing!!!

[khockman]

All I can say if those pups are lucky enough to find a mama like you, then they will forever be grateful! Sometimes being able to give and receive love again helps the heart heel...perhaps this is a sign from Buddy letting his mama know she has too much love to keep just to herself ;)

xoxox,
Kerry

[Mel-Tia]

A yorky poo, sounds different.

I feel blessed to have Tia's brother still with me and he has helped me. So if you want to go see them, then I think that's great.

Big hug

Mel
Xxxxx

[labblab]

Oh Kathy, visiting puppies trumps fireworks any day!!!! :) :) :)

[Budsters Mom]

It isn't going to happen. I posted that last message before I finished it. The puppies are both females. One of them is a runt which I would not want because they often have health problems. I would name her Rosebud after my Buddy. But, it's dreaming only. It has only been two days and I know there's no way I can convince the folks to go along with this. I don't need them adding more pressure right now. It's hard to stay afloat as it is.

[Mel-Tia]

Sorry babe. Sending you some more hugs. Again wish it was a real one

[goldengirl88]

Kathy:
I know you are all over the place with your thinking now, but I think this might just help you through this rough time. The Rosebud part made my eyes well up thinking of Buddy. This would keep you busy and not thinking sad thoughts. I know Buddy would want you to be happy, and if these pups need someone there isn't a better mom they could get. I support you in whatever helps you through this. I think you are doing a wonderful job at putting one foot in front of the other, and forging on. You are giving it your all, just as you gave Buddy your all. God Bless you. Do what your heart tells you to do. I hope I can be as gracious as you when I need to be.
Patti

[addy]

I dont think there is a mandated time limit- two days, two weeks, two months-sweetie, you follow your heart; sometimes things happen for a reason. It is all about what is best for you and that is what Buddy would want as well, what is best for you.:):)

[frijole]

Maybe it isn't about you finding Rosebud but rather Rosebud finding you. Things happen for a reason they say. Your call Kathy. Happy 4th. Kim

[Mel-Tia]

Just nipping into say night. I have to get up early so will be back to see if you are on later

Tight hug to you Kathy

Mel
Xxxxx

[molly muffin]

Awww Kathy, I know your emotions are all over the place, just like I imagine that your parents emotions are all over the place too. If you want to go visit the puppies, (two sounds divine, I wish I'd done that) then take your parents or one of them with you. My parents could never say no to puppies or kittens once they saw them. LOL

You know after Tasha died, it took me a year before I found Molly via a rescue. Oh I think I was ready before, but I had to convince hubby who thought he wasn't a dog guy. (duh, he was sooo wrong). I have however, Never wanted another cat after Tipsy, he was my everything. Yet, I have had pets pass away and within a week had more running around the house. You just don't know what life brings to your doorstep and they were always, except for Tasha, rescues that just needed a home. How could I say no.

I don't think it made a bit of difference how long I waited, grief takes it's own time. Sometimes I was still sad, but there was nothing like having another little one in the house who needed attention, and who would play and be dorky, to make me smile through the tears and I found that the tears started to come less often. That I would laugh and think of something that Tasha did or Divinity and while a pang of sadness might come, the tears didn't always.
I don't think there are set rules for the heart. I think a heart as open and loving as yours will tell you when or if and how you open the door of it to other little ones.
So whatever you do or don't do. It is what is going to be what is right for you today, now. Tomorrow may be different. Who knows. :)

hugs,
Sharlene and Molly Muffin

[Simba's Mom]

Oh goodness Kathy, Rosebud sounds so sweet named for Buddy, I got Simba when my dog Belle was getting older, so I would never be without a furbaby....I don't think you can put a time limit on grieving, some days I still think of my first dog Belle and shed a few tears..just follow your heart and everything will work out, sending hugs sweet Mama!

[Tina]

Kathy, I am checking back in. How are you doing? Oh gosh, puppies! I completely agree with the sentiments that Addy and Sharlene posted. When I lost my precious Dakota, I already had Jasper to help me through, and to help him through because he grieved also. There is no time limit and I know you will follow your heart when the time is right.

More hugs,
Tina

[Budsters Mom]

No puppy for now. My folks will eventually come around, but right now they will have no part of it. Life with 80+-year-olds is often a challenge anyway. I do not want to make it any harder. The loss of losing Buddy is just way too raw for them right now. I need more time to pass so that I can wear them down, so they are willing to entertain the idea. A puppy needs to feel wanted by every member of the family.:o:(

Kathy

[Budsters Mom]

If it were up to me, I would go and pick up my new puppy. Rosebud would join my family here and now. But, I have others to consider and responsibilities that never end. I don't often get to do what I really want, but with Buddy around, it was always okay. Now he isn't and I feel cheated.

[Budsters Mom]

The parrot over the fence in the next yard has been making all kinds of noise trying to get Buddy to react. Buddy normally runs along the fence barking when he hears the bird. The parrot has been yelling,screeching, squawking, and talking to no avail. He hears me outside and thinks Buddy is there too.:(

[Tina]

Aww Kathy, (((hugs))). There are so many reminders of Buddy because he was such a big part of your life. And I so understand how you feel cheated. It is not easy caring for elderly parents, that is a huge responsibility. Having Buddy there made things alright.

I will check back in later Kathy, I need to wait until most of these fireworks are over. :mad:

[Budsters Mom]

Go take care of Jasper Tina. That's what us mommies do! We ease our baby's worries. Thank you for taking a break to check on me.:)

I can't bring a puppy into a home where it is not wanted. My folks don't feel about fur babies the way I do. Xxxxxx

[doxiesrock912]

Oh Kathy :-)
Puppies are so tempting aren't they?

Dad and I recently met and snuggled 2 adorable Doxie sisters:-)
I told him that now wasn't the time. We agreed that we wouldn't stress Daisy out like that.

The perfect time will come and you'll know it.

[Budsters Mom]

This would be the perfect time for me. It is summer and I'm off. However it's not the perfect time for my folks and I have to respect that.:( It is just so dang quiet and solemn without any fur babies in the house. Buddy had an enormous presence. He was always smack dab in the middle of everything! It feels like all the joy drained out of my house and my life when Buddy died. It would be better if I was working. At least I would have the kids at school who need me. My folks need me in a much different way. I am willing to stand up to my responsibilities and I have been doing that. I love my folks, they are good people, but I need more. Buddy filled that void. He is gone and I feel empty inside.

[Trixie]

Back from my mother's house..had to do a quick check in to see how you've been doing.
It looks like you've had lots of posts to keep you busy..also looks like you're still not getting much sleep. :( I understand that though...it's hard to fall asleep with all the emotions you're feeling.
Wow...those puppies do sound sweet. I was thinking that the summer is a good time for you as your are home for awhile.
I hope you get a pup as soon as you can/want. The summer is such good timing for you. By the time school would start back up you would have a new pup pretty well acclimated. So many dogs are in need....you can easily find one who needs you like crazy! They are there just waiting to be loved and give love right back.
As for your parents...well...the thing is they say they don't want it now but having a pet around is so good for the elderly.
My mom-who is 93 was very confused and was acting really batty this evening but when I put Trixie on the bed she immediately calmed down and got her bearings..(well for a little while at least)! :confused:
Well...I'm sure somehow it will work out but you should have that joy of a dog back in your life as soon as you want. I love the name you've chosen if you end up with a female...Rosebud..so sweet and a lovely way to honor Buddy.
Barbara

[Tina]

Hi Kathy, how are you doing? I feel sad that you are feeling that this would be the perfect time for you to get a new puppy but your parents are holding you back. I guess I just want you to be happy, and you have so much love to give.

The fireworks are winding down a bit here, but still going on. I know many people have a long weekend with the holiday, but I have to work in the morning, so better try to get some sleep. It has been a long night. I will try to check in when I am up for Jasper's middle of the night pit stop.

Tina

[Trish]

Hi Kathy, Hi Tina!

I am home and hurray it's the weekend!! Friday night here and I am staying home, yay!! Such a busy week, so I am happy I have a quiet weekend. I am just about to ring Cooper's Mum to check how his surgery went today! Poor lil boy lost his jewels as you put it Kathy :D

I wanted another dog too, but as you know my parents have Flynn through the day while I work and they have told me it would be too much for them to have a new puppy so if I got one it would have to stay at home :( so that idea is out for a while. I have not got another puss either since my two passed last year. Did not think Flynn would like a new cat on the scene and I miss not having a cat around, although we do have to contend with Elle, she is coming with me when I go pick up Flynn after his BP check and vet visit next Tuesday so the vet can give her the pill :D:D:D Mum wants a professional to do it, as she thought I too rough :eek: I was not, she is just a witch spitting it out like that! :eek:

[Budsters Mom]

Thank you Tina for being there today. I hope that Jasper did okay with the fireworks. They are still going crazy loud here. Buddy would've been terrified. We would've been spending the night in the bathroom. It's interesting how there can be so many when they are illegal in California. Except for public displays, of course. Yes, I am bummed about the puppy, But I don't want to bring one in the house that will not be wanted. Puppies are puppies. They cry and make noise and my folks have to be on board with it, or I can't do it. That is just the way it is. If I give it some time, they may come around. Big hugs and thanks again.

[Budsters Mom]

I'm glad that your home to talk to me Trish and it's not so late. Did you get a chance to talk to Cooper's mom yet? I'm sure that he's feeling a tad bit lighter!:D Poor little chap! Buddy was fixed too.

Yes, I really need a puppy. I could housebreak it and get it started training before I go back to work in September, but the folks would have to be on board with it, and they aren't. So I'm out of luck. They don't feel the same way about dogs as I do. A dog is just a dog it's not your child. They don't get it. They did not understand why I spent so much money and worked so hard to keep Buddy going and happy. There really is no support even now. Yes they loved Buddy and they're both grieving. Buddy had a way of warming himself and everybody's hearts. However, they don't want to do it again. It sucks!

[Tina]

Kathy, you're welcome. Today was no day for you to be alone, glad I could be here. Still a bit anxious here as fireworks are still going off, but I must try to go to bed. Jasper will be up in just a couple of hours to go out with all that he has been drinking tonight.

Hi Trish!! Glad I could catch you real quick before I hit the hay for a bit! Yay, it is the weekend for you. I have to work in the morning, but its only one day, and then weekend!!

Big hugs. Nite girls, probably see you a bit later.

[Budsters Mom]

Mel,
I want to tell you goodbye just in case I miss you later. Have a wonderful trip. Make sure you give Boycie lots of belly rubs for me. I don't know what I would've done without you and Trish being there through so many long nights. I have no one here that understands any of it. They don't understand that I need a fur baby to love as much as one needs to be loved. Buddy was my reason for living. He was my life, my love and my reason to go on. Now he's gone and I can't have another one to love. At least not now. It tears my heart out. Check in when you get back. I will miss you. Thank you so much for asking Tia to watch out for Buddy and scoop. Big hugs and kisses.

[Trish]

I think they get so attached to them and they are going through the heartbreak of losing them. Mum and Dad had a much loved cat Tigger, she was a stray and just arrived at their house. They had a another cat at the time and Dad took no pity on Tigger and said she couldn't stay. But that cat knew a great forever home when she found one which was helped by Mum sneaking her out food when Dad was not watching. So she kinda wore him down, she just would not go even when old Max gave her the marching orders :D:D She wormed her way in that Tigger!! Dad grew to love her and she was with them many years. When she passed a couple of years back they were heartbroken and swore they would not have another. Then Elle's owners decided they were moving to Australia and she needed a home, Mum had met her previously and loved her the first time she saw her. But I had to work real hard with them before they agreed to have her, I have had to promise I would take care of her if she outlived them which she will as she is only just turned 3 and they are like your parents with Mum 78 and Dad 80! But they would not be without her now, and boy does Elle LOVE them, I am pleased she is with them to share her furry if haughty love :):) So maybe your parents just need a bit longer to grieve Buddy, then maybe your new baby might have to arrive as a stray (even if its not :D:D) then if she is there they won't be able to turn it down!! I'm a bit sneaky like that :eek:!

Night Tina, you Jasper and Shelby sleep tight now! xx

[Budsters Mom]

Yes, they are heartbroken over Buddy and don't want to ever do it again. Buddy used to follow my dad around like a little shadow. Neither of them wanted me to take him to the vet to have him released. They knew he was in pain but they did not want to see it. Right now my home is like a morgue. It's quiet, it's sad, and there is no joy. I have the whole summer off. I thought I was going to be spending it with Buddy. Now I want to be anywhere but here. No work, no kids, vet bills, no summer income, no Buddy, nothing except heartache.

[Mel-Tia]

Thank you for your note. I am here until about this time tomorrow morning. I woke up early to try and get some admin done before the day starts

Its so tough that you are in this no win position. I get having to be responsible for the parents, hopefully they will mellow about a new dog soon when they also realise how much you miss your Buddy Boy.

I like trishs idea of pretending it's a stray!

Big hug
Mel
Xxxxxxx

[Mel-Tia]

For a little guy he obviously had a very big presence and impacted them too, it must have been so hard if they were saying to you not to take him. You knew him Kathy, I never wanted to take Tia either but I knew I had to, cause its always about them not us

Sending you a tighter hug
Mel
Xxxx

[Trish]

Just got off the phone to Cooper's Mum, she sends her condolences to you too Kathy xxxxx she remembered you had sent a kind message to her when he was so suddenly sick last Sunday. Poor Coops is not feeling too happy, giving little cry's and trying to lick at his wounds. She has a collar for him if needed but she is keeping a close eye on him, he has eaten and had pain relief and while she was talking to me he curled himself up and dropped off to sleep. She said he was giving her sad looks like why am I so sore!! I said ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhh that's the stink eye :D I heard that description on here and have used it heaps since. But all in all the wee pup sounds just fine!

[Budsters Mom]

I know Mel, but Buddy was only 10 years old. They thought he would outlive them. They have lost many beloved dogs over the years and did not want to go through that ever again. I understand that. It just puts me in a really difficult position.

[Trish]

KATHY PACK YOUR BAGS AND FLY TO NEW ZEALAND!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Bed here for you my sweet!! Might be a bit chilly for a California girl likw you. But it is only a 12 hr flight to Auckland from LA then another 1hr to me, you could be here in time for brunch :D:D:D and me and Flynny will come pick you up and take you to the beach for a walk :D:D

[Budsters Mom]

I'm glad that Cooper's doing so well. I think they overmedicated buddy when he lost his jewels. When I picked him up to go home he could not walk and he was really a mess. The next morning he was fine and running all over the place.

[Mel-Tia]

I can imagine. It's so bloody unfair Kathy

It's all so raw and you are all still probably in shock as none of you thought you would lose him so soon. Hopefully with time they will soften and if not then you will have to have words with them to say now you need a dog to balance your life

[Budsters Mom]

I've always wanted to go somewhere, anywhere Trish. New Zealand sounds so exotic and wonderful, even if it is cold. At least I would be able to feel something. You don't know how tempting that sounds!!!! I've never been out of the continental United States except for Mexico which is right over the border. I can't even imagine fresh fish every Thursday. If I'm lucky, I might get fresh fish once or twice a year and that's only on a special occasion.

[Trish]

Hi Mel... don't think I said hi to you yet tonight, what are we going to do without you for TWO WHOLE WEEKS, but we will manage!! Me and Kathy will keep the home fires burning late at night!!

Hmmm don't think we could be called exotic Kathy, probably quite different to what you are used to though :) I remember whenever I have been in the US they barely understand me, I keep thinking hand on we are both speaking English, but my accent was quite tricky for you lot to understand!! Wish I had gone to Mexico, but the furtherest south I got that way was San Diego which I loved. You should look at some sort of trip though through the summer Kathy, will your parents manage without you for a while??

[Budsters Mom]

I might be able to wear them down in time Mel. But now is not the time.

[Trish]

Kathy, I would feed you fresh fish every night if that was what you wanted, cheap as chips here!

[Budsters Mom]

Yes Trish, my folks get around pretty well they just need help with some things. My brother lives nearby. He could pick up the slack while I was gone. He certainly should help a lot more than he does anyway.

[Budsters Mom]

I live about 30 miles north of downtown San Diego and about 120 miles south of LA. It is in the inland Valley. That means it's hotter than downtown San Diego in the summer and colder in the winter by about 10°. It still is quite beautiful here 95% of the time. It would be a dream to come to New Zealand for about a week or so. I never went anywhere unless I could take Buddy with me. But I am obviously just dreaming now. Not that It ever could really happen.

[Trish]

Well you can google Napier, New Zealand and see where I am!! Probably cheaper at the moment because it is off season! Ohhh am I tempting you??

[Budsters Mom]

Yes Trish you are tempting me if you're serious. I don't have anything to keep me here and I haven't really been anywhere.

[Budsters Mom]

Even a 12 hour flight is tempting. As sad as that sounds I would be away from here for 12 hours. I see Buddy everywhere.:(

[Trish]

I just googled a flight, LA to Auckland return USD, at end of July (was cheaper then!!) $1,222.72

[Budsters Mom]

I would have to fly from San Diego to LA first. The price is not unreasonable. I am not an adventuresome type of girl. Flying off to New Zealand to stay with a friend that I found on online, is so not me. It is has been fun dreaming about it though and has helped my mood. Thank you so much for that! You are amazingly awesome. I am so glad that you and Mel are there. The man in the white coats would've taken me away by now. I think that the white vans are still circling my block.

[Trish]

Well think about it, I promise you I am not an axe murderer :D:D I am presuming your not either :D:D I have heaps of leave owing so could take a week off to show you around!

I have ordered a curry, so popping out to pick it up, be back in a half hour or so :D

[Budsters Mom]

What is a curry?

[Budsters Mom]

I would love to come to New Zealand for a week Trish. No I am not An axe murderer. I work in a local public school in special education. I work in a fourth through sixth grade combination special needs class.

[Trish]

Well in this case it is Chicken Madras curry which is Indian with rice and garlic naan bread with yoghurt cucumber dip!! AND poppadoms :D and some salad so I can pretend I am being healthy :D

I am serious Kathy, you are welcome here!! I told Flynn Aunty Kathy might be coming!!! He gave a yip of approval :) Do you have a passport??

[Budsters Mom]

I have never been anywhere. I do not have a passport. I would have to get one and I don't know how long it takes.

[Budsters Mom]

Flynny reminds me so much of my dog Spot when I was a child. I would love to meet him. Remember the photo that I scanned for you and put in my photo album under check it out?

[Budsters Mom]

I am in no way dangerous. I am a big softy who misses her little dog more than life itself. I let him go because he was in pain. Now I am the one that is in pain. I really could use a change of scenery. My home is so solemn right now. It is like a funeral parlor. There are reminders of Buddy everywhere.

[Trish]

Just finished my dinner, that was delish!! Well you can think on it a bit, I am a long way away but my house is open to you my friend :) Maybe see how you feel in a few days, but planning something different and getting away might be just what you need... you might have somewhere closer (and cheaper!) you could visit to get a change of scenery for a bit!! But my offer stands for whenever you would like to take it up! Flynny loves visitors and houseguests even better :)

[Budsters Mom]

Well Trish, it is 1:30 AM here. I probably should try to get some sleep. I haven't really been able to sleep since Buddy passed. Your offer is very tempting and very sweet. I planned to spend this summer with Buddy, thinking it would probably be his last. That is why I didn't sign-up to work summer school this year. Now he's gone and I am floundering. I haven't been eating or sleeping much as I've had no appetite and feel very sad. Sad that he's gone and knowing that I can't get a new fur baby at least for now. Enjoy your curry. I've never had Curry or even heard of it before. See, I am definitely a Native Southern California girl. I'll talk to you tomorrow or later tonight if I can't sleep. Thanks for being there. XXXXXXXX

PS My mom was up looking for something and I told her that I might go to New Zealand.:D You would have enjoyed that reaction.:D

[Budsters Mom]

Thank you so much for your offer Trish. It means a whole lot.:D The firecrackers have finally stopped, so I should try to get some rest now. The sun will be up in three hours. I guess I didn't realize just how special Buddy was until I lost him. I will probably never be the same again. Big hugs to you and Flynny boy. I'll chat with you later.

[Trish]

Of course you realised what a special little dog he was, we could tell that by your posts about him... your pride and love for him was so evident to all who read your stories. He was such a little character and so well loved!! That is why you have such a big hole in your heart right now.... Sleep well Kathy, Your poor Mom probably thinks you have flipped your lid, one minute bringing in a new puppy and the next jetting off to NZ hahaha..... life is short though, do the things that make you happy! Night, I will be here a while yet if you wake xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

[Budsters Mom]

Maybe that's the answer! I wouldn't need to escape if I had a new puppy who needed me. So, either they let me bring a puppy home or I take off for New Zealand. Who knows, that could work!;):D

[Trish]

Ha now there's an ultimatum, let me have the pup or I am off to the bottom of the world!!

Mel, I think we need to do a food intervention... our friend Kathy does not appear to know what a curry is!!!

[Mel-Tia]

Sorry I have a site down, that's the worse thing that can happen so it happens today!

I don't like curry. I am English I promise :D

[addy]

I only had a few words

GO TO NEW ZEALAND:D


Kathy, they have penquins!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[labblab]

Oh, I think a trip to visit Trish and Flynnie would be WONDERFUL!!!!

But I also want to say something about your parents and the dilemma about a new puppy. In truth, I think they are being very selfish if they are putting their own needs/wants above yours in this situation since it is you and not them who would be responsible for the puppy's care. I realize that you do not have the power to change their minds or attitudes, and it is certainly to your credit that you do not want your parents' issues to make life hard for a little puppy.

But I do not think it out of line for you to tell your parents that their attitude is making a hard situation even worse for you. In truth, if they are in their 80s, you are the one who is likely to be left totally alone in the years to come -- not them. Would it not give them some peace of mind to know that instead of being left alone, their daughter would have the companionship of another beloved dog? Perhaps they just do not truly understand what a huge role Buddy has played in your life, and it would help if you explicitly tell them. Maybe this will make no difference at all in their thinking, but at least you will have had the chance to express yourself. Because you are absolutely right that this summer is the perfect time for you to adopt a new puppy if you are ever going to do so at all. If your parents want you to wait past this summer, then they are effectively making it impossible for it to happen at all. And that means they are placing their own wishes above yours, which seems very sad to me in this situation. It that is really the way that things turn out, of course we will be here to support you. But you give so much to so many others, Kathy. I really hope you will be able to claim some happiness for yourself.

[Squirt's Mom]

Ok, here's the solution - go to NZ and visit. Then on your way back home, stop by, pick up the puppy, and tell your folks she was a gift from NZ! :p

[goldengirl88]

Kathy:
I think if you asked the person with the puppies if you could bring the puppy back if your parents won't budge you could chance it. Since all of your hearts are broken, once they see a small puppy it may melt their hearts, and change their minds. Just take him for a look see to your house for a hour or so and see how it goes. I am thinking of you and Buddy, couldn't sleep well last night thinking of all that has happened. Just know a puppy has some big paw prints to fill from sweet Buddy.Blessings
Patti

[Budsters Mom]

Thanks for all the love ladies.:) You have all made excellent points as usual. However, I like Leslie's plan the best. :D Trish is very kind. That would probably be my only chance of ever seeing New Zealand. Plus she would take a week off to show me around and share Flynny with me. It is very tempting!:cool: Buddy can never ever be replaced, and I wouldn't want to. What I need is another fur baby that needs me. One that the sun will rise and set on just like Buddy. A little critter to spread joy and make everything okay. Although a trip would be a dream come true, what I really need is a puppy. Some little being that is happy to see me when I come home.xxxxxxxx

[molly muffin]

Hi Kathy,

Thinking of you and Buddy today.

I like Leslie's idea too. Take the opportunity for a trip if possible. What the heck, live wild! Get someone to check in on your parents and go for a week at least or two (and take the train and see New Zealand) Then when you come back, bring a puppy home and see how your parents react. :) It doesn't hurt to see how they react, they will have had time to be alone without you or Buddy and miss you both.
I'm full out ready for you to go have a grand adventure! We would all be soooo jealous!

hugs,
Sharlene and Molly Muffin

[Budsters Mom]

:eek::eek::eek: I just realized that I lost my purse! My ID, cards, cash, all of it! I am so distraught that I can't think straight or even take care of myself. I am going to continue to do what my parents need me to do for them, but I am no longer going to pretend that everything is okay, because it sure as heck isn't!:( I am not one to make waves because I strive for a calm balance, always being the peacemaker, so I usually give in. Not this time! This is too important! I am not going to be the accommodating, cheerful daughter they are used to having around. I can't even remember where I may have left my purse!:eek:

[molly muffin]

Okay, stop, breathe, deep breaths and lets retrace your steps.
Where did you last have it?
What have you done or where did you go since you Knew you had it?
Did you go out anywhere and pay for something? That is a place to start too, if you paid you had it.

Breathe.
Sharlene

[goldengirl88]

Kathy:
Thinking of you and hope you find your purse. Blessings
Patti

[Trixie]

Please tell us that you have found your purse and ID's etc.
You don't deserve having this happen to you so I hope it was just misplaced or you hung it somewhere unusual. I am praying you have not lost it!!!
Barbara

[Trish]

Good morning Kathy, hope you got some sleep.

Oh no, I have those senior moments all the time, lose my keys, glasses, phone and yes purse regularly :D:D:D Has it turned up??

Gawd Addy, nothing like a bit of pressure, you will have me hunting out penguins haha.... I have only EVER seen one on our beach and it was dead!! I do know there are rescue penguins at our aquarium just up the road... so we could visit them :D:D

[Budsters Mom]

Hi Trish,
I was leaving a message on your thread while you were leaving a message on mine.:D I'll let you refer to that when you get a chance. Sounds like you're having a spectacular Saturday already! You may need to get out sleeping bags because there are other angels that want to come too!LOL:D That would sure be a hoot!:D XXXXXX

[Budsters Mom]

By the way Trish, you will not have to hunt out penguins to entertain me, although that might be fun! LOL We have plenty of penguins here in San Diego in the penguin encounter at sea world. I've seen many penguins of all breeds, shapes and sizes.

[Trish]

Excellent, I will worry about the penguins when Addy comes then :D:D I will have to find you a Kiwi though, our national bird and I bet they aren't in San Diego Zoo!

[KennyJ]

Kathy, I just read about Buddy. I am so heartbroken for you. :(

[Fellasmom]

Kathy
Just checking in to say hello and let you know you're in my thoughts.About a week after I lost Fella,I couldn't stand to be in this house a minute longer-it was just too painful.I packed up and went to an inn in the mountains for the weekend.I was heartbroken but a chance of scenery was just what I needed.Of course,the white van was waiting patiently for my return but that's another story!:D:D.If you can't make it to NZ,perhaps a few days away somewhere to just relax,take deep breaths and begin to heal would do you good.

Looking at pups online gets you everytime!I find after a loss, its a comfort to look at all the babies that need to be rescued.I realized a part of me was looking for my little Fella but it gave me hope that there was a little baby out there that I could pour all the love I had in my heart to another and make me happy again.I adopted Romeo only 6 wks after losing Fella but I fell in love with him immediately.Although he never can replace my love for Fella,I needed to breathe life in my house once again and I do feel that I am honoring Fella by loving another little boy.That being said,go for it if you truly think it will make you happy!!Sometimes you need to stop being the peacemaker as you said and do something that makes you happy!I'm with Trish,sneak her in/lie about "finding" her,whatever-get your girl if that's what you really want!She will be one lucky pup having you as her mom.
Love,
Patty

[Mel-Tia]

Hey Kathy

Just wanted to send you a big big hug before I go away, given how much is left to do I may not get on here in the morning

I will be thinking of you and if I can get on I will at least once

Love
Mel
Xxxx

[Budsters Mom]

Mel,
I am so sorry I missed you before you signed off for your trip. I really would've liked to have sent you off in a blaze of glory, fitting such a worthy angel.:) I hope your holiday is everything you would love it to be. Rest up, recharge your batteries and spoil Boyce to death. I will miss you babe. Big hugs and kisses.

[Budsters Mom]

Trish,
The San Diego zoo is the world's largest zoo! Yes they have kiwi birds, but I have never seen one in the wild. LOL :D:D I think if the animal exist somewhere in the world, our zoo has them. They might even have some kind of mutant never been seen new hybrid beast. ROFL. We also have the San Diego wild animal Park here. It is a huge park where there's free Range animals in environments as you would see them in nature. I have to say it is very cool!;)

Would I need to book a separate flight from Auckland to Napier? :confused: xxxxxxx

[Trish]

Well I have never seen a Kiwi in the wild either so that makes two of us!! :D:D They are nocturnal birds and only in the native bush! I have been to San Diego Zoo and Sea World too, but not the wildlife park!! Maybe if I visit there again you can take me :)

Yes you would have to take a separate flight Auckland to Napier, the only airline is airnz.co.nz Otherwise it would be a 5 hr drive for me to come pick you up in Auckland!

[Trixie]

:D I have a kiwi fruit in my fruit bowl! Kind of resembles a kiwi bird in color. ;) heehee couldn't resist.

I'm really posting to find out about your purse Kathy, I imagine you must have found it??

Barbara

[Budsters Mom]

Barbara, Yes I did locate it, but it was pretty well ransacked. I don't care too much about the cash. It's the cards and personal items that are hard to replace. My drivers license was still there, so I got that back. I don't carry credit cards around town, but my debit card was taken. I called the bank this morning when I realized that my purse was missing so they put a hold on all purchases. Nobody had attempted to use it as of this morning. They require a pin to use it at the stores, one is not required for online purchases. I had the bank issue me a new card this morning. It could've been a lot worse!

I just received a hand written condolence letter from Buddy's trusted vet. He has been taking care him since he was a puppy. It was very heartfelt and got me crying all over again. :(I really thought that they would be thrilled to get rid of me! I can be a pain in the ass when I'm a mama on a mission! I questioned everything! What a sucky summer! XXXXXX

[Trixie]

Aww..it's so nice of Buddy's vet to send you a condolence note...that really was sweet of him. It got the tears flowing but that's to be expected..and probably good to cry it out when you need to.

But goodness your purse had actually been taken!!? :eek: I thought you may have just misplaced it. I'm so glad your license was there and only the debit card and cash were missing. You're right-it could have been worse- but you really didn't deserve this happening, especially right now while you're going through so much. When it rains it pours doesn't it? :(
Barbara

[Mel-Tia]

Hey Kathy

Sucks about your purse. I can understand how though as its like your in a daze, nothing is real so the purse would be the last thing you think of till you need something

Just wondering how you are doing tonight? Hope you have managed to eat a little something today

Tight hug

Mel
Xxxxxxx

[Budsters Mom]

Thanks guys for trying. You are truly angels.:) It has been three days since I set Buddy free. It feels like forever! My life stopped when his heart stopped. I was asked in one of your posts to let you help Buddy help me. I have come to the realization that I cannot be helped short of a miracle. I have always tried to be a good person and live up to my responsibilities. I have put everyone else's needs first, whether at home, or with special kids at work. Buddy was mine, all mine, above all else. He was the best and most loving part of me. His unconditional love made me a better person. We were inseparable. Now that he's gone, I am unable to function well, or barely at all. No one understands what the big deal is. After all, he was just a dog. Buddy was my world. A cute little bubble who surrounded me with love. He was never judgmental, always accepting and loving to all people. Critters were another matter altogether!:D I need that connection with another fur baby now. Buddy taught me how to truly love. He would want me to share it with others in need. Unfortunately, I am unable to make that happen right now. I am feeling, frustrated, numb, empty and sad and I can't do anything about it. So thanks for trying angels. You have been there day and night to talk me through my sorrow. It sucks to always do the right thing. I set Buddy free because he looked at me with pleading eyes and I knew he was pain. If I had just kept him drugged, he would still be with me now and I wouldn't be such a complete wreck. See, it sucks to always put other's needs before your own. Lesson learned.

[Trish]

HI Kathy - I need to reply to this but have company coming for dinner so will get back to you later.... You would not be feeling better by keeping Buddy alive just because you could, that would have been selfish and you know it. I will be back later xxxxx

[Mel-Tia]

You couldn't see him like that which is why you let him go, irrespective of how it was going to make you feel.

I am so sorry that circumstances are impacting your ability to get another dog, you are clearly very unselfish and it makes me mad to think that you are feeling like this.

I wish there were more than words I could offer

[Budsters Mom]

Love ya Mel xxxxxxxx

[Mel-Tia]

Love you right back. I try and keep the faith it will all work out in the end, otherwise I would be battier than I am!

I will be asking Tia to send subliminal messages to the parents that they do want a puppy. It would please me no end if I came back and it was so.

[Budsters Mom]

If anyone can make it happen, Tia can. XXXXXXXX