Coco, Miniature dachshund - sweet Coco has passed

[molly muffin]

Well, at least you can cross the thyroid off and just periodically test and make sure it stays stable.

Remember what Addy said, just one day at a time and yesterday was obviously pot roast day for CoCo!!
LOL That cracked me up. I think the little guy might look rough around the edges, but he must be feeling pretty chipper if he is going for the whole roast. LOL


hugs,
Sharlene and Molly Muffin

[infoviewer]

Hey Sharlene: Hope Molly is having good poops. Does not take much to make us happy. I am waiting for the fall-out so to speak with CoCo. I am sure it is coming. I do have Metronidazole and Centrine if it happens. Just enjoying a little bit of good news with no hypothyroidism right now. Love, JoAnne

[infoviewer]

I am really so concerned about CoCo having the glucose curve. He is so weak. He is just not doing well at all. So thin. It will be 30 days Wednesday since I took him off the Trilostane so I could start the Lysodren, now diabetes. He has been on the insulin a week and he seems weaker to me. I know Lysodren would lower the cortisol and high cortisol is what caused the diabetes. So u would think if you lowered the cortisol, his blood sugar would decrease. I am just a basket case and really don't know what to do. He just seems to be wasting away and so hungry. I know diabetes and cushings cause him to be so hungry. Little dogs are pitiful. Love, JoAnne

[molly muffin]

When is he suppose to have the curve done? Do you think he is still losing weight? How have his glucose numbers been? Daily I mean. Are you checking? Is he remaining fairly steady?

Hang in there JoAnne

hugs,
Sharlene and Molly Muffin

[addy]

http://www.2ndchance.info/diabetesdog-glucosecurve.htm

You can try to do a curve at home but if Coco is not doing well maybe it is better he has it done in the hospital setting.

What frightens you about the curve being done?

[infoviewer]

Hey All: Everything about diabetes scares me. Just wondering if I should treat the Cushings instead of the diabetes since the high cortisol caused the diabetes, but I guess he would still have diabetes even if I started him on Lysodren and lowered his cortisol. CoCo just seems so sick and helpless, I guess I am just afraid to leave him for 12 hours and he has to be stuck every 2 hours. He has had so much done to him for the past three years and he just seems to be getting worse. I am just dreading it for him and wondering if I am doing the right thing. The vet thinks if we get the diabetes regulated, he will improve and then maybe start the Lysodren, but I know it is so hard to keep them from crashing when they have so much wrong. I just don't want to do any harm to him and hope that I can make the right decision for him if I have too. Love, JoAnne

[Squirt's Mom]

Mornin' sweetie,

Your vet is right - the diabetes is the critical one to address. Once his diabetes is stable, then you can look at the Cushing's. Diabetes MUST be the main focus, tho. The odds are, the uncontrolled diabetes is what is making him so weak and I'm sure it is what is causing him to lose weight - that is a key sign for diabetes. When his blood sugar is under control, he will probably start to feel a whole bunch better.

Coco will be at the vet's for the curve so he will be where he would need to be when he is so weak should something happen during the curve. I don't think they are physically strenuous nor dangerous to do - just takes a long time because the draws have to be made at intervals through the day. Some folks perform these at home and I'm sure Natalie could teach you how to do them yourself when he is stronger so Coco didn't have to spend the day at the vet's and you are more at ease with the idea.

You are doing a good job, JoAnne, in the face of what I am sure is great heartbreak and fear. We were all terrified of Cushing's until we learned a little bit about it, right? You will become more and more confident with the diabetes, too - I have NO doubt about that. :) You will always to the best you can for Coco just as you always have.

Hugs,
Leslie and the gang

[addy]

Sweetie, I cant presume to know how you feel, I dont blame you for being terrified and overwhelmed and I totally understand that.

As far as I know, diabetes in a dog has to be treated. Cushings will sometimes make it more difficult to control the blood sugar but it usually trumps Cushings as far as what do you treat first. I dont think that if you treat Cushings, the diabetes will go away. To my knowledge it does not work that way but maybe someone else can address that. Does Natalie know the answer?

I know you are scared but I think you have to think about what you and Coco can handle. You know Coco best but I think there is more bothering you then the curve being done and only you can decide how much the two of you are capable of doing.

I remember how terrifed I was when I first read about Cushings. I cried driving home form work for months. I kept trying to deny it and look for answers other than treatment. The thing is with diabetes, we dont have that option. It has to be treated, it is different.

JoAnne, you need to follow your heart. Only you know what you can handle and there are no judgements here.

[infoviewer]

Thanks so much guys. It just seems like CoCo is so weak, but keeps trying to do what he used to do. Just now he jumped off the sun deck down to the ramp which he has done all his life and it is about 4" and I guess he tried to jump too far and he fell and rolled over and jumped up like "what happened" and kept going. We have rugs all over the hardwood floors so he does not slide down, so guess I will have to get an outside rug for there so he can fall on something soft. Maybe he will get stronger after the diabetes is controlled. Does not like to do his walk any more. Just sits down on the sun deck and says "you go on, I will be here when you get back watching for the door to open to the house". It is sad, but you have to laugh at him. He knows where the food is located. I am sure I watch him too much since I am with him almost all the time. I am sure it will be better after the glucose curve, I will know more about it. He is doing fine with the insulin injections. The vet has already told me he will put him in the surgical suite so he won't be with the barking dogs so that will be good. If they are stressed the curve won't be accurate, so I guess they take that into consideration. You would think I would not be so distressed, I used to be an office nurse. Oh well I am sure he will be fine. Just something new for us. Love, JoAnne

[Jenny & Judi in MN]

sounds like Coco still has some spunk in him, that is great! please hang in there Joanne. I can't emphasize enough to you that Jenny was in exactly the same condition 2 years ago and is so much better now.

I think cush dogs feel more frail because their spine bone seems more prominent too.

I hope he has a very calm day at the vet for his curve and that that settles your nerves. big hugs to you and to Coco

[infoviewer]

Well here I am again, CoCo has congestive heart failure. Vet gave him some medicine, but it is not really helping. He is trying so hard to breath. I think I will have to put him down. He is just panting terrible. His whole little body is moving. I thought he had hypoglycemia when I took him yesterday, but when the vet listened to his chest he said congestive heart failure. I cannot bear to see him suiffer to breath. Anyone familiar with congestive heart failure. I gave him an enalapril and lasix, but no diffirence in his breathing. Love, JoAnne

[Squirt's Mom]

Oh, my word, JoAnne. More bad news for our sweet boy. :(

My Tasha took the Lasix for fluids around her heart and it did help. She peed allll the time between it and the pred, tho. She was not on any heart meds tho. Josie took Vetmedin for her heart issues and it helped her for the short time she was here. I hope some of our members who have lived with CHF will be along soon to share their experiences with you.

You know your sweet boy best of all, honey. I believe you know when he has had enough. I know, too, the anguish in your Heart today, the fear of making "the decision" too soon...and the fear of waiting too long. Listen to your sweet boy, watch him closely and you will see that sign that tells you it is time. I spent months back and forth with Tash, thinking her time had come only to see her bounce back again and again. But when the seizures started, I knew that was "the sign" - it was too much to ask her to deal with that progression on top of everything else she was dealing with. I let her go before she could suffer that horror on a daily basis; I let her go while she still had dignity. This is a deeply personal decision that only you and Coco can see and make. We trust you completely, as does our sweet Coco, and know you will do the very best for him just as you always have.

I am sending healing and strengthening energies, prayers, hugs, and belly rubs,
Leslie and the gang

[infoviewer]

Thanks so much Leslie. He is having such a hard time breathing. I am going to watch him closely and see if he is any better with the medicine. He has had a heart murmur, but the last day or two I noticed it was so hard for him to breath. I thought maybe the insulin worsened it, but I guess will all his problems, his little heart is failing. I don't know if I can bear to have him put down, but cannot see him suffer. Thanks, JoAnne

[Boriss McCall]

JoAnne.. I am so sorry you & Coco are going thru this. I know the decisions you are facing are painful. Hopefully you will see some sort of improvement today & you won't have to make any decisions at this time.
I know watching them breath heavy is one of the worst things & so scary.

hugs..

[spdd]

I'm sorry to read this. Really praying that there is some improvement today.

My thoughts are with you.

[Jenny & Judi in MN]

JoAnne: I'm so sorry to see this. You have been so very worried, I think your gut instincts are dead on with your boy and something has just been telling you he isn't right.

I hope his breathing can be eased. hugs, Judi

[infoviewer]

My sweet little dog just died. My husband took him to the vet and he took his last breath. He was gasping for breath all morning and I held him all morning because I knew he was dying and he got down and went to his bed and was dying and my husband said he took his last breath on the way to the vet. I tried to hold him all morning so he would die in my arms, but he was always a dog that wanted to do things his way and he went to his bed. We tried every way to save him and we just could not save him. The vet said he had congestive heart failure, so his heart gave out and he died trying to get his breath. I should have let the vet put him down yesterday, but I still had hope. Dogs just don't live long enough. We are just never ready to let them go. I just feel so bad that I did not let him die easy. He had the best life that a dog could have. Even had a big RV to travel in. Love your babies, they are gone too soon. Love, JoAnne

[Squirt's Mom]

Oh, me, JoAnne. I am so sorry, honey. Coco just had too much going on to fight any more. I know he felt your arms around him the whole time, sweetie, even as he crossed The Bridge, he felt your loving arms holding him. He is free from all pain now - no shots, no pills, no vets, no fear, no confusion. Your sweet baby boy is just as he was in his youth today, strong and full of joy. Coco was met by so many of his friends from here and he is running in the Rainbow Fields, his ears flopping, tail wagging, his heart filled with love for you and all you did for him. He will never forget, never stop loving you. And when your job here is done, Coco will be waiting to fly into your arms once again and be by your side for all eternity.

Our deepest sympathies to you and your husband,
Leslie, Squirt, Trinket, Brick, Sophie and our Angels, Ruby, Crystal, Tasha, and Josie


Weep not for me though I am gone, into that gentle night.
Grieve if you will, but not for long, upon my soul's sweet flight.
I am at peace, my soul's at rest; There is no need for tears.
For with your love I was so blessed for all those many years.
There is no pain, I suffer not, the fear now all is gone.
Put now these things out of your thoughts, in your memory I live on.
Remember not my fight for breath, remember not the strife...
Please do not dwell upon my death, but celebrate my life.

[Spiceysmum]

So sorry to hear about Coco, my thoughts are with you.
Linda

[molly muffin]

Oh JoAnn :( I don't even know what to say. I know your heart is breaking and we share your sorrow here. CoCo will be missed by many here. He was such a valiant little guy, always ready for the next adventurer, even when it took all he had to do so. The smells and fun times on the many travels with you and hubby.
What a wonderful life he had with you and such a happy guy because he was right where he wanted to be.
I am just so sorry JoAnne, I'm just going to have a good cry with you today and probably tomorrow too. :(
Hugs,
Sharlene and Molly Muffin

[infoviewer]

Thanks all, yes we are heartbroken, but I held him close my heart all day, but he wanted to go get in his big bed and just as my husband walked in he gasped, but he took him to the vet but he died before he got there. He was gasping when I picked him up. His little heart just quit on him. My sweet lil man is gone, but never forgotten. Love, JoAnne

[frijole]

JoAnne, So sorry to hear this news - lord knows you both fought the big fight. Glad you were able to cuddle him and hold him close so he knew he was loved immensely to the very end. Bless you for all you did - a terrific mom. Hold fast to memories of the healthy happier days and know we are here for you always. Kim RIP dear Coco - run free dearest angel - run free.

[Harley PoMMom]

Oh JoAnne,

I am so sorry to hear for your loss of sweet Coco. You and your family are in my thoughts and prayers.

With Heartfelt Sympathy,
Lori

[Roxee's Dad]

Dear JoAnne
I am so very, very sorry. Coco knows how much he was loved. Many of his cush family will be at the rainbow bridge to meet him and take good care of him.

Rest in Peace sweet Coco, tonight you are our newest and brightest star in the night sky........

(((HUGS)))

[Skye]

I am so very sorry to hear of your loss. My deepest sympathy.

[doxiesrock912]

Oh JoAnne!
I'm crying as I read your posts!

I had a pet cockatiel take her last breath while I held her. I'll never forget that image.

Sweet Coco is no longer struggling.

[spdd]

I am so very sorry to read this. You did give him the best life a dog could have, please take some comfort in knowing that.

My deepest sympathies to you.

[infoviewer]

Thanks so much all. Everyone that has llost a precious pet knows the grief you feel, but I know it will get better with time and I know CoCo has no pain any more. We will miss him always and never forget his sweet ways. He took over our whole life after he got sick and we gladly took care of him and we wish we had many more years with him, but his little heart just gave out. Love all here for the love and care you take of these little sick furbabies. Love, JoAnne

[addy]

Dearest JoAnne,

I saw your post yesterday but was at the hospital, my mom had to have surgery. I wanted to write you so badly but I was heartbroken about Coco ad could not post from the hospital. Please accept my apologizes for not posting yesterday, it bothered me so that I could not.

I am so glad you were able to hold him i your arms. Without a doubt your little boy knew how much he was loved and treasured. When we read writings, it is is hard for us to gauge how sick a pup is sometimes, I was praying it was a matter of getting the insulin right.

But we know our puppies best and you knew little Coco like the back of your hand. A mom always knows.

Sweet JoAnne, I send so much love and prayers for you and your hubby. Thank you for sharing precious Coco with us. I feel I know him from all your posts and through my tears this morning, I still cant help but smile at the memory of the pot roast just a few days ago. Coco was one strong spirited dog who did things on his terms. He is at peace now.

I share your heartbreak and your tears. Please know you are not alone and we are here for you. I will pop o the forum as I can. I care about you and want to be there for you.

[goldengirl88]

Sending you much love, and many prayers on the passing of your sweet baby. God Bless you all.
Patti

[Tina]

Dear JoAnne,
I was just heartbroken to read the news about CoCo. I am so sorry for your loss. You and your family are in my prayers.

Love and hugs,
Tina

[infoviewer]

Thanks so much. Everyone on here knows how heartbroken we are. He has had a rough almost three years. I had taken him to the vet the day before because I thought he was hypoglycemic, he was not, but the vet listened to his chest and said "wow" and I knew it was not good, but I did not expect him to go so quickly. I am just glad he is not suffering any more. We all loved him so much. He was my little man and he knew it and took advantage because he knew I loved him so much. Hold your furbabies and loved ones close. Love, JoAnne

[Squirt's Mom]

Keep talking, honey. Anytime those dark times come, we are here for you to listen and hold your hand. These first few days are so tough simply trying to adjust to the sudden changes in routine. Our expectations of what we need to do are just as strong as ever and it's a shock to remember we no longer need to do many of those things. You and hubby hold each other tight, share your memories, talk often of your sweet baby boy, and know that he is looking down on you both with great love and pride.

Hugs,
Leslie and the gang

[Boriss McCall]

Joanne,
I am so very sorry to hear of Coco's passing. You are in my thoughts today.
((big hugs))

[lulusmom]

Joanne,

I'm so very sorry for your loss. My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family during this very difficult time.

Godspeed Sweet Coco.

(((Huge Consoling Hugs)))
Glynda

[infoviewer]

This forum has helped me so much and is still helping. CoCo was so sick and I know he is not hurting now, so that is something to be thankful for, but I will miss him forever. Love, JoAnne

[molly muffin]

They become so near and dear to our hearts here on this forum. Yes he is pain free now and that is what is right for him, but it still leaves a huge hole. So much time is dedicated to trying to make them well again, that it seems strange to not have that worry in your daily life, 24 hours a day even.
Just know that we are here for you any time at all JoAnne.
super big hugs,
Sharlene and Molly Muffin

[Squirt's Mom]

I Will Wait For You...

I will wait for you...
Though we never wanted to say goodbye,
Remember me...
When winter snows are falling through a quiet sky
I'll remember you
When, in our darkest hour,
You held my hand and prayed I wouldn't go,
But a silent voice called out to me;
My time had come, and I had to travel Home...

Since then, I know your life has never been the same,
For I visit you each day:
So many times I've felt your pain:
I've watched you cry:
And I've heard you call my name...

But now, further along life's road I stand
In a timeless world, just beyond your sight,
Waiting for the day when I can take your hand and bring you across
to this land of Golden Light...

Till then, remember me, you understand-and try not to cry.
But if you do:
Let your tears fall
For the happiness and joy we knew,
And for the special love we shared,
For love can never die.

~Stephen O'Brien

[apollo6]

Dearest Joanne
I am so sorry to hear about the passing of your sweet Coco. I am crying while writing. The loss is so great. May you have some comfort knowing you did your best. Coco knew it.
Hugs Sonja and Angel Apollo.

[infoviewer]

Thanks Sonja, you know my pain so well. You know these dachshunds have a special way about them that you can never forget. CoCo was in such a terrible shape, but he just kept trying and we tried so hard to save him, but no more pain for him. Love, JoAnne

[mcdavis]

So very sorry to hear about the loss of your sweet CoCo. You and your family are in our thoughts.

[Trish]

Hi JoAnne

I am very sad to read about wee Coco, what a tough little doggie and your love and care for him shone through all your posts. He did not want for anything, especially love which he had in spades. Take CAre xxxxx

[Bailey's Mom]

JoAnn I am so very sorry to hear of your loss. CoCo sounds like such a champ. You are very correct in that they are never here long enough and yet we keep repeating this process. I love what Leslie had to say and she said something similar to me when Palmer crossed over the bridge. CoCo is romping and stomping and those ears are flopping around. He is breathing just fine now. No more pain. No more meds. Lots of buds to play with and when you join him, he will come bounding over to greet you just as if it was fifteen minutes ago. You gave him joy, peace, love and comfort. He had everything he needed because of you. Take care of yourself. He would not want you to suffer because of this.

Hugs,
Susan

[molly muffin]

Dear JoAnne,

Thinking of you and your family and precious CoCo.

Sending love and hugs,
Sharlene and Molly Muffin

[infoviewer]

Thanks so much guys. Sad today, but I know it will get better as time goes on, but I still expect to turn arouind and see him behind me with his floppy ears and sweet face. Love, JoAnne

[addy]

Sending love and hugs JoAnne

[infoviewer]

Thanks Addy: I hope your Mom is okay, also Zoe and KoKo. We are still sad and always thinking I could have done something to save him, but he was so weak. Love, JoAnne

[molly muffin]

Hugs JoAnne,

there is nothing you didn't try for sweet Coco. You and your husband gave it your all and so did CoCo. He was just tired and weak and couldn't do it any longer.
I know this is sad and I feel sad for all of you and for CoCo too. It just breaks my heart, because he really was such a special little guy.
There will be many days of downs and sadness and then there will be some of smiles and fond memories.
Bluntly speaking, it sucks. But you did try and then you tried some more and after than, some more. You all gave it everything you had.
hugs,
Sharlene and Molly Muffin

[Harley PoMMom]

JoAnne, sending huge loving hugs.

[Simba's Mom]

So sorry to hear about your precious Coco, sending hugs and prayers

[infoviewer]

Thanks so much for caring for CoCo and also what you do for your furbabies. This forum has so many good, cariing people. Anyone that loves and cares for a Cushing dog has to be a special person. We are missing CoCo terribly, but knowing he is at a better place and not so tired and sick. Glad he went while he could still walk and still had all his facilities. He was a dog that did everything his way. He had such a strong prsonality. They called him the "biter" at the vet office when he was younger, but mellowed out when he got old. Was never a cuddler until he got old and then only with me. He was a one-person dog and I was glad to be that one person. Love all, JoAnne

[spdd]

Just wanted to tell you, I'm thinking of you today.

[infoviewer]

Hey all: We are still missing CoCo terribly. Still wondering if we did everything possible to help him. Just wondering when I will forgive myself for not helping him that last day and when will I forget his little eyes asking for help, but the vet told me they would put him on an IV and I knew he was dying and I could not bear for to die without us with him and he died before we got him there. Hard to understand since he had slept all night the night before and I had to touch him to wake him up and he ate his little snack like usual, but would not eat his breakfast a little later and was panting with his little sides going way in and out and I held him and talked to him and carried him in the yard to his favorite places, hoping he would just stop breathing. He finally wanted down while I was looking for an ER that had a digital ultrasound that could possibly make the right diagnosis. I looked around and he was not behind me and me and my husband walked to his bed and he gasped and I picked him up and tried to restart his heart and my husband rushed him to the vet, but I knew he was dead when I picked him up. He was so sick and I am glad he did not have to go through any more testing, but I am so distraught. Love your furbabies because they are gone too soon. Love, JoAnne

[Squirt's Mom]

aw, JoAnne...sweet little Coco was right where he wanted to be when he left this old world, he was home with those he loved most and those who loved him most, in his comforting, familiar surroundings. He got to choose his own time and his own way to cross through the Veil. I have a feeling he knew there was nothing more that you or anyone else could do for him and he took matters into his own hands, relieving you and himself from further stress that would not bring positive results.

I was just talking to Squirt this morning about when her time comes. I hope she will do as Coco and simply leave when she knows it is time. I don't know that I will have the strength and courage needed to let her go otherwise and would be most apt to keep trying to force her to stay a little longer no matter what. Yet I know if that is how it happens, I will also blame myself for not seeing, for not understanding, for not trying to do more.

There is no "good" way to lose our babies but Coco got to leave from home surrounded by all he loved and not in a stressful, cold place that reminded him of all his trips and tests there. I think that is how we would all like to go - from home, from our safe and familiar surroundings, not strapped in a hospital bed hooked to machines. In that sense, Coco was very lucky. I know without doubt that Coco does not blame you in any way but is so grateful to you for the life you shared with him and all you did to make that life the best it could be.

Hugs,
Leslie and the gang

[infoviewer]

Thanks so much Leslie. I know that in my heart, but just heartbroken and miss him so. He was my baby for twelve years and I cared for him like he was a baby and just so hard to let go, but I know it will get better. Love, JoAnne

[goldengirl88]

JoAnne:
So sorry to hear your Coco has passed. I will say a prayer for both of you. I hope God helps heal your heart. Blessings
Patti

[infoviewer]

Thanks Patti.

[molly muffin]

Sending you love and hugs JoAnne.

I couldn't agree more with what Leslie said. CoCo went on his final journey surrounded by those he loves, where he loved to be.

I say that knowing that there will never be a way to lose Molly that I will be okay with. Logic is one thing, the heart is another and what the heart misses, it just does, there isn't anything to be done for it, other than to acknowledge that it hurts so much because the love was so great.

Sure it will get better, or it will become different at least, but the missing and the love will always be there.

Hugs,
Sharlene and Molly Muffin

[mypuppy]

Hi Joanne,
I feel your pain as if my own...and that goes for the rest of our k9 family here...we share the good and the bad, always. Your Coco and my Princess are now romping together where pain no longer is. Losing my girl without a warning and so suddenly has been devastating. It's only been a week. I know I will forever miss my girl and look forward to seeing her someday. I am so sorry for your grief--it really is the worst and most empty feeling in life.

Prayers for comfort and peace for you, Coco and all those who experience such deep sorrow.

RIP precious Coco!

Stay well mom.

xo Jeanette

[infoviewer]

Hey Guys: Thanks for caring. A week ago today, my little man was sitting behind me in his bed. He got up at 3 in the morning to go out and then he would get a little snack and he would go back to sleep. He did the same last Thursday. Then he would get up at 5 and eat and get his insulin. He would not eat and I knew he was headed downward. He just started the awful panting and I cuddled with him and held him the rest of the day until he knew it was time and he went to his bed to die. I will always think there was something I could have done, but I did not want him to continue to have all the testing and shots and doctor visits that would continue. All of this was for me. He was so sick and tired, no quality of life the vets had told me several times, but I kept trying to save him. At least he went out on his own in his own bed with us still trying to save him and my husband thinking the vet could bring him back, but to no avail. No more pain for him. Goodbye my sweet boy. Love, JoAnne

[infoviewer]

Hi All: I am still distraught over losing CoCo. Seems like I get worse every day instead of better. I know he was so sick, but I read through all the posts and it just seems like there was something we just did not catch with him. He was treated by 5 vets since he was ten years old, but it just seems like something was missed. I am hoping I will get better soon. Hard to remember him when he was such a strong beautiful little black dachshund when he got so sick looking before he died and he never complained and tried to take care of himself until the moment he died. I am thankful he had all his facilities when he died. He could still see, no blindness, still went outside and did his peepee and dodo and always knew he was the cock of the walk. I try to remember that, but we miss him so much. Got a letter from University of Tennessee yesterday, my vets donated money in CoCo's name to UT, maybe they will find a cure for Cushings. I still try to read the posts when I am not so distraught and there are so many new Cushings dogs. Maybe a cure is coming soon so our precious pups don't have to endure this disease much longer. I so appreciate all the information and love my sweet pup and myself received here. Love, JoAnne

[Squirt's Mom]

Aw, sweetie, it has been such a short time since our sweet boy went Home; of course you are still distraught. That is perfectly normal. I spoke with a dear friend this morning who lost her baby 11 months ago and she can't bring herself to think of that even now. She, too, keeps thinking she missed something that might have helped, blaming herself for how her baby spent his last day. This is a normal part of the grieving process and that process takes time, lots of time. For some losses, there isn't enough time but we do learn to live with the loss and the pain we carry each and every second. I have pics of Crys and Tasha and Josie, and every time I see one, that pain comes rushing back in, fresh and new all over again. All those doubts and questions that have no answers. You are not alone in this, either, JoAnne. We do understand where you are and we want to help if we can. You can always talk to us, share your pain and fears and doubts safely. We will cry with you and let you scream if needed. You and Coco are special to so many here - never forget that.

Hugs,
Leslie and the gang

[infoviewer]

Thanks so much Leslie. I know the people on this forum have the same feelings about their precious babies as I do. In fact my children, grandchildren, sisters and extended family all so love their animals and we are all so distraught when we lose one. I always say I am not going to get another one. They bring so much joy and I know that, but right now the joy does not seem to outweigh the sadness. CoCo was so sick and the vets and all of us tried so hard to save him and he was so stoic and never complained or whined. He was with me 24-7, even took him on vacation with us so of course we are lost, but we will get better. We are supposed to go to Tunica the end of the month. My husband built a bed for him beside my chair in the RV, but he has taken it down so maybe I can stand to ride without him. He so loved to ride in the RV and walk in the park. I am hoping the first trip without him will be the hardest and it will get better. We have friends that hire a dogsitter to go on vacation with them so their dog is not in the room alone. What has happened to all us old dog lovers. Oh well, we do love our furbabies and when they leave us we are distraught. So happy Squirt is doing well. You are a wonder Leslie. Love, JoAnne

[addy]

Dear JoAnne,

I have not been here much but had a moment to log on during lunch and saw your post. Healing takes a long time, grief has no time limit.
Never doubt that you always did the right thing for Coco. You did everything you possibly could. Blame and worry can eat us up and destroy us. Coco would not want you to go down that road.

Hugs and love and although I have not been around, you are always in my thoughts and prayers.

[infoviewer]

Thanks so much Addy. My mind knows that, but my heart does not. I have thought so much about you and I am so sorry about your mother and I know the sorrow you feel. I am so glad Zoe is doing so well. It gives the others on this forum some hope. It always gave me some hope, but CoCo was just too sick and we lost him. This is the third dachshund I have lost and this one seems the worst, but I have probably forgotten the grief I felt with the others and CoCo was so sick. The others I just found dead in their bed, which was horrible also at the time, but not sick like CoCo and I can only see his little sick body. I am sure I will be able to see his beautiful healthy body as the time passes and I look at his pictures. There are so many new Cushings dog on this forum. It is so concerning that this disease never ends. Thank you so much for your loving and caring ways. I love all the pups and people on this forum. Love, JoAnne

[molly muffin]

JoAnne Hugs, it is still so new, this loss. Don't rush yourself and don't beat yourself up either. I cannot imagine a better mom to CoCo and don't think he didn't know it. That guy loved you and your hubby as much as he any dog could love someone. And he was happy. Even sick, he was happy and he was a go getter too. Just days before he passed remember, he had a huge ole pot roast out for himself. hahaha That guy had some character. I remember you telling me about your trips to Tunica and what fun he had. He loved to go in that RV with you.
I hope you have some happy pictures of him out and about, to remind you of who he really was, because he was so much more than the little sick fella that fought to stand sometimes. Those are the memories that you will cherish for all the days ahead. Sure he was sick and you knew it and did all you could do for him. I can't think of anything that you missed.
We cherish you JoAnne and I have missed you on the forum, but I know it is hard to come here. It is a reminder of so much, but know you have a home here too, always and forever. Just as Coco does. Family never goes away.

hugs,
Sharlene and Molly Muffin

[scoora]

JoAnne, I'm so sorry for the loss of your sweet boy CoCo.
That was a wonderful thing the vets did in donating to UT in CoCo's name.
The staff at Scoop's vet's made a donation in Scoop's memory to the Morris Animal Foundation when he passed and it gave me such a warm, special feeling inside that they did that.
Does the UT do research on Cushings?
I sure wish someone would find a cure for this terrible disease! My Scoop went through a lot, too, because of it.
Hugs

[Budsters Mom]

My dear Joanne,
You absolutely cannot rush these things. It has been 3 1/2 months since Buddy passed and I still cry often. I cry every time I think of our last day together. I cry whenever I think about never being able to see Buddy's beautiful smile again and about how rare that was. I am fine one minute and not the next. I still have Buddy's stuffed frog and blanket on my bed so that they are close when I need them.

Your loss is very new. You feel what you feel and that's the way it is for now. It does get better, but it takes time. For some of us, it takes lots of time. Be gentle with yourself and allow you feelings and emotions to be released when they need to flood out. I'll be thinking of you and sending many healing hugs your way. If you'd like to talk more with me, feel free to send me a PM. Others will recent losses have and I'm fine with that. It does help to reach out to someone who is dealing with the same issues and understands. Having said that, most of us understand here as many of us have experienced losses. Xxxxx

[infoviewer]

Thanks so much guys. I know time heals, but since CoCo was so sick it seems like his death is taking a toll on me and my husband. UT does do research on Cushings and many other illnesses I think. I could barely read the letter we got from UT and have not been able to go back to the vet clinic and thank everyone for their 12 years of caring for CoCo. His regular vet has called and talked to me, but very hard for him also, he had just lost his lab. They also get attached to these little sick dogs they treat. It has only been 3 weeks since CoCo died, but I really feel more distraught now than when he died. I know he felt so bad, but he had a wonderful life and we all know what we do for our pups. I so appreciate this forum because everyone that has lost a furbaby knows what I am going through. Love, JoAnne

[goldengirl88]

Joann:
Just know that I pray for you and hope you and your husband can get thru this together. Blessings
Patti

[infoviewer]

Thanks so much Patti. So glad Tipper is doing well. You are such a good mom to your babies and help everyone on this forum. I still check the forum often. It is a comfort to me. Your babies are so lucky. Love, JoAnne

[Trish]

Hi Joanne

Poor old Coco really had the cards stacked against him towards the end, I often think of it as a slippery slope. You fight against one thing and then another starts giving you grief. You did all you could for that sweet boy, so you and your hubby just be kind to yourself and rest easy knowing there was nothing you did not do for that boy in his best interests. I really think he is a superstar when at the end, he must have thought... OK now is the time, with no fuss off to bed he went for the final sleep. You did good by him Joanne xxxx

[infoviewer]

Yes Trish, CoCo was a real trooper. Never whined at anything. We miss him terribly. He was really sick the last day and did not eat so I knew he was going since he was always hungry, but he went out on his own with all his facilities. Love, JoAnne

[infoviewer]

Well it has been one month today since my sweet little man left us. The grief is still as fresh. Anyone have any ideas on how to stop the heartbreak and lump in your throat. We were going to take a trip the end of the month to Tunica, but CoCo so loved the RV and the park at Tunica and we have just decided we cannot bear it. We know we have to go on, but it is so hard. We have lost 3 dachshunds, one lived until she was 14, one 7 and now CoCo 12. CoCo was so sick, but never complained, not even the day he died. His breathing was so bad and I regret that I did not take him to the vet, but they told me they would put an IV in him and I knew he would die without us unless we just let them put him down and we just could not bear it, so just held him until my husband just could not stand it, but he took his last breath as the car pulled out of the driveway. I see so many others have died recently. The vet told me CoCo had congestive heart failure the day before he died, so I guess his heart just quit. Of course I have wondered if it was the Vetsulin which he had only a few days before he died, HeartGard 4 days before he died and the Enalapril and Lasix. I guess you always wonder when a pet dies, especially when they have so many things. Any of them could have killed CoCo, he was so weak. I get on here and just talk because I know the people on here know my grief. I have a friend that lost her 14 year old dog and she had lost her parents and her husband of 60 years and the grief of her dog was the worst. I guess they are our babies, especially when they are so sick and you are with them 24-7 and you try so hard to save them. Sorry for the book. Love your sweet furbabies. Love, JoAnne

[addy]

There is such a profound bond between a Cush pup and their caregivers, moms and dads. It is a deep bond like no other, I think, JoAnne. So the grief is just awful, even the anticipatory grief is awful.

It has to work itself out, sweetie, and will take time to do so.

I know what you mean about Coco not eating and you knew that was bad. I have always said the day Zoe stops eating, I will know she is giving up the fight.

Maybe a different trip this year, change it up and get away for a weekend, just you and hubby, no RV no Tunica.

Hugs and love and you can write as many "books" as you want on your thread.:):):)

[goldengirl88]

JoAnne:
Your Coco's story is just heartbreaking. I think just about everyone on here is in the position of what to do when they know their baby is going to pass. It is one of life's hardest decisions. I have gone over the scenario in my mind. I want to be with my girl I know that much, but don't think I could keep her home and watch her struggle as it would kill me literally. I like so many, need to think this out in advance, cause nothing ever goes as planned with these cush pups. There have been so many that have passed this year that it scares me to death. Every day I wake up I think will I have another day with my girl? Every nite I go to bed I thank God for another day with her. After all the care these babies require, I think it take a lot of time to begin healing as the emptiness has to be overwhelming. I am so sorry for your pain, and hope somehow you can begin to heal the hole in your heart. Blessings
Patti

[molly muffin]

Hi JoAnne, big hugs. I know you love to go to Tunica and CoCo loved to go to. I think no matter when you make that trip and you will at some point, it is going to be hard and bitter sweet, knowing CoCo isn't there to enjoy it too.

A month in grief land is very little time at all and a cushpup, or any other that you spend so much time thinking of their health, what can they eat, when do they get their medication, what can we do to help them, takes more time than others I think. It is just different with cush pups like Addy said.

You can write anything you want, any time you want JoAnne. Sometimes you just need to get it out to be able to say it Somewhere.

Your poor friend, to lose so much. :(

It is very hard for pups and for humans with congestive heart failure. Especially if it just shows up one day out of seemingly nowhere. We will probably never know the exact cause of that. We do know that it was just too much for his little body to handle. He sure did try though for the longest time. Coco has spirit. :) And so do you.

hugs,
Sharlene and Molly Muffin

[apollo6]

Dear Joanne
Everything you are feeling is so normal. I have grieved more for Apollo than I did for my dad? It has been over 1 year since Apollo
Died in my arms and I still cry. I started a journal and wrote to him almost everyday to tell him how I felt. Like was said, the bound with a Cushing baby is so strong. I have a locket with Apollo's hair I wear almost everyday and hold it for comfort. I have one of his collars hanging from the rear view mirror that I reach for often. I have his little pillow with his little tie shirt on that I hold often. do what ever you need to do. Have your feeling, talk to Coco,cry when you need to. when you go on that trip you are honoring Coco with the memories and things he loved. You are remembering him and keeping him close to your heart. We are here for you. Because you loved him so much, everywhere you go will see,feel him. I could hardly breath the first few months after Apollo died? His presence was everywhere. Humune society's have grief meetings, and there are a lot of books about loss.
don't discount your feelings. We all know to well what it is like, and when others don't understand,know we do and are here for you.
with love Sonja and Angel Apollo
Know that Coco and Apollo are whole once again and playing with each other,watching over us.

[infoviewer]

Thanks guys. Sometimes the grief just gets the best of me and I just have to vent and I know all on this forum understand. Love, JoAnne

[Trish]

Hi Joanne

Feel for you and your hubby as you try and make plans for time away. I do like Addy's idea of trying somewhere new this time. Maybe plan the Tunica trip a bit later when you are feeling stronger but this time try somewhere new that you and hubby have been wanting to explore?? I hope your break brings you some rest xxx

[infoviewer]

Hey All: We are still grieving for our sweet CoCo. Today is our wedding anniversary, 53 years. Isn't that amazing. Where have the years gone. We are just as happy or maybe more than when we first married, although a lot older. We are waiting until the grief subsides a little more to celebrate and go somewhere. Of course with 53 years of celebrations, it is hard to think of somewhere new to go, but I am sure we will be able to think of something, although it is bittersweet this year. I wanted to give you Cushing parents a little information. CoCo seemed to do very well for a year and a half or maybe two years, hard to remember now, on the Trilostane. Then he seemed to start losing so much weight and we took him to two different IMs and a so-called Cushing specialist. Come to find out he had worms, so possibly that was the reason for weight loss. The specialist took him off the Trilostane for 30 days so we could start Lysodren. I acturally went back to his regular vet, but continued him off the Trilostane since he seemed to be doing better with his stooling and everything, then diabetes was found. He did start the panting about 5 days before his death, but he had so many problems that at the time I did not associate it with him being off the Trilostane and I had taken him to the vet the day before he died and he said he had congestive heart failure and none of the 5 vets that had treated him had suggested that, he did have a heart murmur. As all of you know we try to analyze what has caused the death of our pups, now I am just wanting everyone to be careful if they are taken off the Trilostane and watch out for the panting. And then agaiin it could have been the insulin, we will never know. Just a thought. Love, JoAnne

[molly muffin]

53 years!!! Congratulations and Happy Anniversary, although I know this year it comes with a tinge of sadness too. However, here you are 53 years later, and still just as happy as can be with each other. Having that sort of love and stability in your life can be such an asset when you go through something like this, which is overwhelmingly sad, that you just need that extra shoulder sometimes to help carry the load.

Thank you JoAnne for posting about CoCo's journey. You never know who it may help going forward.

hugs,
Sharlene and Molly Muffin

[mcdavis]

Congratulations on 53 years and Happy Anniversary.

I recently had to return to the place where we said goodbye to Hamish - it was very, very hard but we had visited previously and also had many happy memories so I tried to focus on those

[addy]

Happy Anniversary JoAnne:):):)

That is quite a milestone.

My brother and I have developed a saying whenever we have to make a decision regarding our mom. It is "no looking back" after we make the decision. Sometimes guilt keeps us in the past and most of the time that guilt is misplaced.

JoAnne, please know you did everything you could for Coco. Sometimes, we just get too sick and there are no options left.

Big hugs to you and hubby. The pain is still so new for you both but I hope you manage to have a celebration of some sorts for your special day. You both deserve that.

[infoviewer]

Thanks so much guys. We are enjoying our day. Love, JoAnne

[infoviewer]

Hi Guys: Still grieving and crying for our baby CoCo. I read the posts a lot and some furbabies are doing good and some not so good. I see so many new people. Just wish they could find a cure and I so wish so much health and wellness for all the dogs on here and many hugs for the ones that have lost their babies. I feel the caring hugs across the miles from this wonderful group. I just sent Sonja a post because I know her pain and was hoping it was less for her and love the dogs last will and testament, but just not there yet, I have had 3 dachies to die and this one has hurt worse than any because he was so sick. Love all, JoAnne

[BreeandDaisy]

Sorry to read of the passsing of Coco, but happy for your 53 year milestone.

My late dog, Bree, died from congestive heart failure which he had in addition to Cushings. He had had an enlarged heart, heart murmer etc. before he was ever dx with Cushings. I do know that dogs can live 1 - 2 years with congestive heart failure, but that does not mean that they all live that long. Obvious I know but I think we hold onto that 2 year prognosis with such hope. Bree had it for 6 months. Like in your case, he had actually been to the emergency vet the night before he died. I came home to find him with a nose bleed - and there was a cut which I think our pup's snaggle tooth caused but who knows for sure. At 11:30pm the emergency vet checked him out. Asked me about the heart but certainly did not say he was dying! We went home and were told to keep an eye on the nose bleed. It had of course stopped by then.

Next morning at 6am he was fine. 7am he was in heart failure. Rushed him to the vet's where he was put into an oxygen tent to help his breathing. Even then although I was told if he came out of it he would likely only have a week before he died, I really believed he would come home for at least the weekend. He was actually improving when we went back to the vet's and they thought he might be able to come home and be watched by us. the hour and 20 minutes out of the oxygen tent put him right back up with the panting and shallow breaths. As we would have to move him to an emergency vet for the night (and I did not want him with strangers if he was in fact dying), and noting that he was always worse in the car we decided it was best to put him to sleep. Months later I asked the vet if he thought Bree could have made it through the night, and he honestly told me he would have died in a couple of hours. At least we saved him some discomfort.

Sorry to ramble, but I wanted to say that congestive heart failure can come on quickly even if there is a good prognosis.

Not sure that eases anything for you, but I hope it does.

Shari

[goldengirl88]

JoAnne:
Thinking of you and sweet CoCo. Hope you had a nice anniversary. Blessings
Patti

[infoviewer]

Thanks Guys: That helps, I just felt all the vets that saw him should have realized he had congestive heart failure and he would have been treated and not have had to have the horrible panting to breath before he died, but he had so many things wrong and they had already told me he had no quality of life, but he did, he was still eating, had all his facilities and went outside still to relieve himself, still barking at anything close to his area, so we waited for a sign that he did not want to do his regular things, but waited too late, the last day he was breathing so hard and he gasped and I hit his chest trying to restart his heart (wrong thing to do I am sure) and my husband rushed him to the vet, but he took his last breath when he pulled out of the driveway. Of course he still flew to the vet, we don't know why. CoCo was 12 and sick for at least 2 1/2 years and we knew he was dead. We have always been "fixers" and thought we could fix him I guess. I love all that love and care for these precious pupsl. Love, JoAnne

[addy]

Dearest JoAnne,
We keep trying despite the odds, we want to “fix” whatever we can for our pups- even against terrible odds. The hope lights the flame in our heart and soul and we push harder because hope keeps us warm on a cold winter night.
And then they are gone, our precious, beloved dogs in a blink of an eye it seems and hope is gone, the flame doused and the cold creeps in.
Sometimes we can’t explain their death; sometime we know all too well what happened and wished we did not.
Grief is a process we all dread having to go through. Sometimes the anticipatory grief is even worse than the final grief.
I am so sorry it is so hard but I recognize that it is and I hope one day, this last part of your journey gets easier. I think about you and Coco quite a lot. I have no answers, just hugs and love and a new hope that your heart will heal as Coco would want it to. We miss them so, our brave warriors, every single one of them. They are never to be forgotten, ever, by any of us who traveled with them on their journeys for we knew them and loved them from the pages written here and here they live on forever.

[molly muffin]

I think that is one of those things that any of us dread to hear our babies have is congestive heart failure. That they didn't know this with Coco, maybe is because it did come on sudden. The body just fails in part after part. For some maybe it is kidneys or something else that manifests itself, but for Coco it was the heart.
Addy is right, we all try to do whatever we can to fix things for our babies. They can't, and they rely on us, so I think we just Feel that responsibility for their little lives, held dearly in our hands. When we have fought the battles, so long and so hard, how can we not be even more devastated when they are gone.
I hope that you and your hubby and daughter and family are all doing well.

hugs,
Sharlene and Molly Muffin

[infoviewer]

Thanks so much guys for the good, kind and intelligent words, I don't know what the ones that are grieving here would do without your kindness and love and for all here that know what grieving for a beloved dog entails. I have had many things happen in my life that have hurt to the core, but losing CoCo seems to be something I cannot deal with, although my mind knows he was so sick for a long time, but takes longer for your heart to heal. Love all you guys and fur babies. Love, JoAnne

[apollo6]

Dear JoAnne
What you are feeling is very normal. I am feeling the same. I am still struggling after over a year.
So keep writing for support.
Hugs Sonja and Angel Apollo

[infoviewer]

Thanks so much for your caring Sonja. I am still so distraught that I can hardly say his name out loud, so I come here to talk about him because I know everyone understands. Me and my husband and children and grandchildren cannot talk about him yet. I don't remember ever being this distraught over any of my human or animal losses, which is hard to even write, much less speak out loud. Love, JoAnne

[addy]

Hugs and love, JoAnne, I cant tell you it will get better, I dont know things get "better" maybe it is just we find peace at some point.

Come to talk to us whenever you need to, we are always here to listen.

[goldengirl88]

Joanne:
My heart goes out to you, I don't know how you are doing as ell as you are, but I hope you heart starts healing. It is a terrible shame that all the people on here love their dogs so much, and this disease takes them away. I sure hope someday there is a cure for this, and one that doesn't involve high risk to the animal to accomplish. God Bless you and your baby in heaven
Patti

[Budsters Mom]

Hi Joanne,

Buddy left me on July 2nd, so it's been a little over 4 months. I have never grieved so intensely for anyone either. I think it's because our babies here are dependent on us for their very existence. All of our love, energy and resources pour into that helpless little one and we are totally consumed by it all. I didn't just lose a beloved fur baby, I lost my heart dog and purpose to continue on. I am starting to see light at the end of a very dark tunnel and my sense of grief is becoming less intense as I find a new purpose that makes sense to me. So for me, it is getting better.

Please don't try to rush through your grief process. The steps are important. They need to be done according to your own individual needs. I know the pain is intense, but you will get through this and be able to move forward when the time is right. In the meantime, cry your heart out whenever you feel the need, letting the waves of grief flood out. I don't think we ever get over losing them, we just learn to live without them. ((((((Hugs))))))

[infoviewer]

Thanks so much guys for the kind words. It does help and I do know it will get better as time passes since this is the third doxie I have lost, but of course it does not feel like it when we are going through the grief process. One of my doxies broke his back, was operated on and was in the hospital 6 weeks and I was so distraught I could not even go see him in the hospital and we worked on him and he learned to walk again and lived three more years, but was only 7 when he died and I was so distraught then that I thought I would be sad forever, but then they brought me CoCo and here I am distraught again, but we had CoCo to love and take care of for 12 years, or I am sure CoCo thought he was taking care of us since he was such a bossy and high spirited little dog. Thanks again guys for letting me remember with love. JoAnne

[molly muffin]

Every time we lose one, it hurts like our very soul is being ripped out of our bodies and we think, nothing can ever feel like this again. Then we go through the process all over again, and while each one is different, we love them whole heartedly and build our own unique bonds with them and then we experience the grief again, when we lose them as we are bound to since our life spans are so different in length and again it feels like we are dying a slow death without them.
I don't know if that explains it adequately, but that is what my experience has been. I always think to myself and sometimes say, I can't go through this again, and yet, one day, I will, because what they bring to our lives, each and every day that we are blessed to share it with them, is so very special, that it seems impossible once you have experienced it, not to do so again, somewhere along the way.
big Hugs JoAnne. Coco, shared a special bond, love and life with you and your family. The grieving process is also a way to honor that unique and wonderful experience and life you shared.

hugs,
Sharlene and molly muffin

[infoviewer]

Thanks so much to all you guys. I come here for support and I always feel better and we all know our beloved furbabies' life span is not as long as a humans, but for some reason we cannot believe it. My daughter had a dog that lived 18 years, but she was in bad shape the last year, dog Alzheimer's probably, but still doing what dogs do and my daughter could not bear to have her put down so she died at home. She was a cockapoo so I think they have a long life span unless they get a dreaded disease like Cushings and we all know the horror of this disease. Love, JoAnne

[addy]

Hi JoAnne,

I miss you and have been thinking about you and wanted to stop by to say hello. I know things have been so hard and I hope maybe a bit of peace has come your way.

Thinking of you with love, remembering our Coco and wishing your family well. Miss you.

[molly muffin]

Hi JoAnne,

Thinking of you on this first holiday without CoCo and wanted send you much love and well wishes. I hope you are having a good Thanksgiving surrounded by friends, family and love.

hugs,
Sharlene and molly muffin

[infoviewer]

Thanks guys. We are pretty sad, but just glad the little dog is not suffering now. Hope all of you are ok. Love, JoAnne