Trinket-our little bauble! has crossed The Bridge

[DoxieMama]

Enjoy your breakfast, Trinket! :)

[labblab]

Les, sending lots of well wishes on this first day of Lysodren! Also, I'm sure you've already thought of doggie diapers to help contain the mess when Trink relieves herself unexpectedly, and maybe there's a reason why that won't work? Anyway, FWIW, here's a website offering tips for dealing with bowel incontinence. It may be of no value to you since you already know how to express her bowels, plus I realize her issue is a bit different, anyway, what with the diverticuli. But here's the link, anyway. Also, if you click on the "Products" heading, they show some varied diaper options.

http://www.handicappedpets.com/bowel-management-in-incontinent-pets

Marianne

[Squirt's Mom]

Thanks, Marianne! I have bought both pet diapers and preemie human diapers but have yet to get them to stay on for more than a could of steps even with a onesie over them....I don't think the people who design doggy diapers have ever actually seen one! :confused::eek: But I will order some of these peepers and see if they will fit her and if so get a pair of the suspenders to help. I've thought of asking Jody, the babies' groomer, to cut the hair off her back end, hind legs, and tail...but that would just let the feces get on the skin and burn it even more so the hair stays for now.

[Squirt's Mom]

After the 5th bath today, I did cut the hair on her tail, around her butt and down her back legs. She still has hair so the skin is still protected but the length is gone so hopefully it won't be such a mess to clean. I also got her a larger size onesie and the next size up diaper for her waist size...the onesie fits better but the diaper is still too short...they need to be about 2" longer from the crotch/butt up to where they are taped around the body. But the fasteners around the waist are already crossing each other a good bit so the next size up would be too big around by a mile. We will try this tonite and see what happens. I am still going to order some diapers from this new place and see if they are better fitting.

[labblab]

Hey, Les, just hoping for an update on Trink...

How are things going for you girls?

[Squirt's Mom]

We are doing fine...thanks for asking! Tomorrow will be her last day for the daily Lyso according to the directions we were given and I have seen no changes in appetite - none of the other signs for lowered cortisol work for her due to the meds she is taking OR lack of those signs without the meds, like Lasix. I have not been giving the Lasix this week and her drinking/peeing had decreased the day or two before starting the Lsyo. Her water intake is very erratic so even tho I kept a water intake diary for over a week, it has little value as a result. But her appetite is still very strong.

The intestinal issue is the same. She is either so liquid she has constant leakage or is packed up and I have to go on mining expeditions. :D (I have to joke and laugh or I'm not sure I could do this. ;) ) She is SO very GOOD about it, tho! She just sits there without a sound or fight and lets me work. I don't gag near as much as I did at first so I'm getting better with this....maybe some day I will be as good about it as she is. ;) She has yet to need to use a stool softener which good since so far I have not found one with a cap soft enough to squeeze with my fingers. After purchasing castor oil, I found out it is not recommended for dogs. :rolleyes:

She remains a very loving sweet little girl even with all that is going on in her teeny body.

[molly muffin]

Trinket is just a love. Always has been, always will be. She knows I'm sure that what you are doing is to help her, so just deals with it, plus she trusts you and thats really important. Dogs are smart like that.

[Squirt's Mom]

Trink is doing ok....no change in signs as far as appetite goes. Nor have I been able to find that sweet spot for her intestines just yet - either constant leakage or packed up - but we will keep trying til we do. She is faring well, I'm exhausted. I keep thinking she HAS to be sore but she doesn't make a peep nor act as if she is in any discomfort at all except for when she is packed and need helps. Then her little wagging tail just breaks my heart and makes me so proud of her at the same time. She truly is one tough baby girl...and sweet as sugar.

We go for another US next week to see if the growth on her adrenal has shrunk and I intend to find out exactly what we are trying to treat with the Lyso - Cushing's, elevated cortisol caused by the growth and diveriticuli, or adrenal cancer - IF they know. I don't really see any need for another ACTH at this point because there have been no changes in signs...I'm sure it's still out the roof. :(

[Joan2517]

What a brave and sweet little girl...

[Harley PoMMom]

She's a tough loving broad just like her Mom :D

[spdd]

You amaze me. You really do. I do have to admit though I actually laughed (very sorry) when I read about the gagging. Been there before and I just had this image flash through my mind about you that almost got me into hysterics. I'm sorry Leslie.... honestly I am. If I could draw it, I would and send it to you. I agree about the two of you being tough.. that's why Trinket was meant to be with you, and you were meant to be with Trinket. Such a cute name too.

[tank&kat]

There were a few times I had to go outside and completely break down from pure exhaustion. Washing bedding and cleaning floors was an hourly event so I know how that can wipe you out emotionally and physically. I also know that you would do anything to make her comfortable and be free from pain. That's what makes us keep going when we think we can't move another inch. I'm anxious to hear the results after the ultrasound next week. xx

~Kat

[Squirt's Mom]

Trink is ok...doing the same. I am astounded by the amount of laxative she is taking and still has poop building up that is not very soft - not as hard and spiky as it was at first but not soft-serve by any means. She is getting an adult human dose+ of Dulcolax plus castor oil plus mineral oil...and in pretty big doses every single meal which means at least 4x a day. And it's still hard enough to fill up that pocket which then has to be cleaned out. The cleaning usually prompts her to try to poop and she is able to move some out most times for which I am very happy to see. I've contacted Monica Segal to work up a diet for her and I am anxious to get it and see if that helps.

I take her to see Dr. Erikson and Dr. Nafe in the morning for the ultrasound to check the adrenal growth...I'm not sure what to expect. She will probably be there all day as I have an appt in LR not far from the vet and don't really want to put 3 trips back and forth in one day on the truck. It's old and hasn't been used this much in years so I worry it will lay down on me if I don't baby it. :eek::D

She getting a bath in a few minutes...SURPRISE! ;) But she is so stinky and really needs one. She hasn't had one in a day or three so it's time unfortunately. Her skin hasn't started with any problems but I expect that any time now due to all the baths.

I'll let ya'll know what I learn tomorrow when I can.

[labblab]

Hey Leslie, wanted to warn you about using the combo of Dulcolax and mineral oil:


Dulcolax® Stool Softener should not be used with mineral oil because this will result in mineral oil being absorbed rather than acting as a lubricant for the bowel walls, which could cause adverse side effects.

I don't know about castor oil, but the same warning may apply. Also, extended use of mineral oil, even alone, can interfere with proper absorption of certain vitamins, etc. I definitely realize you have a serious issue you're needing to solve in terms of stool softening, but just wanted to make sure you're aware of the warnings.

[Squirt's Mom]

Oh dear, no I wasn't aware and now I wonder if Dr. E is aware as I am following her directions. geez....

Thanks so much for this info!

[labblab]

It may be that Dr. E thinks this combo is necessary, but I just wanted to bring the warnings to your attention. Mineral oil is often thought to be pretty benign, but there are some cautions, especially with long-term use. For instance, another warning is that aspiration of mineral oil can result in respiratory problems, even pneumonia. So for Trink, that can be another issue.

For long-term use, maybe a straight stool softener such as Colace would be better than ongoing reliance on a stimulant laxative such as Dulcolax. Although I don't think mineral oil is supposed to be combined with Colace, either :o.

Unfortunately, extended use of any of these aids can result in diminished natural bowel function. Given the fact that you're needing to use increasingly large doses makes me wonder if that may be happening already for Trink. Maybe in her case, you'll always need to rely on artificial aids. But maybe a different combo would be safer. That I don't know...

[Squirt's Mom]

Trink went to see Dr. Erikson and Dr. Nafe yesterday for another ultrasound to check the adrenal growth. Much to my surprise is has shrunk! :cool::cool::cool: The left adrenal, where the growth is, has also shrunk a bit but is still a little larger than the right. (I keep forgetting to get the measurements :rolleyes: ) So they are now leaning toward PDH with a cyst on the left adrenal gland since neither believes Lyso would shrink a tumor. I'm not sure about that myself but haven't had the time to do any research. They want to continue this very low dose of Lyso then recheck in a month - ultrasound and ACTH. They are not gungho on the ACTH like they would be with another pup due to her other conditions, COPD especially, and the low Lyso dose is also due to her other conditions... ie they are taking it very easy with her which is ok with me for now.

I had a page full of questions for Dr. E and she put my mind at ease about everything I have been making myself sick with worry over - primarily another of these pockets forming deeper in the colon where we couldn't reach to keep clean and a pocket rupturing. Neither is very likely at all thankfully. Adrenal cancer is also unlikely. ~~whew~~

The Dulcolax I have been using is the generic store brand. We talked about switching from Dulcolax to Colace and spacing out the mineral oil. So after my own doc appt yesterday afternoon I went to the store to get Colace. Come to find out the active ingredient in brand Colace AND generic Colace is the exact same active ingredient in the generic Dulcolax we are using so there is no need to switch. She has been getting just the Dulcolax since last nites first supper (she eats like a Hobbit now! :p ) and got a hefty dose of mineral oil in salmon water late last nite. She was not very thrilled with that but did get it down. Her BMs are ok but still not as soft as we wish but I think we will get there.

So all in all a good day for my itty bitty girl!

[mcdavis]

So pleased to read good news for little Trinket. Is it possible that something in her diet is making the stools hard and working against the laxative / softener? You know so much more about this than me, but I just wondered if maybe reducing the fiber in her diet for a few days could help (as they normally recommend eating more fiber to harden stools)?

[Joan2517]

Good news, Leslie...

[Squirt's Mom]

Trink's diet for right now is salmon, cod and sweet potato so there isn't a lot of fiber to bulk it up. I had to stop the Honest Kitchen we tried because that made the stool harder than ever and the Stella and Chewy's she's been eating for some time suddenly started having large pieces of sharp bone and I can't risk that. ;) I'm anxious to try the diet Monica comes up with!

[Truffa's Mom]

So pleased that our Itty Bitty Girl is doing so well. She is an amazing girl, who's mom loving care does wonders for her ( and her vet seems so in tune with you both, that it makes me sing).
I'll keep sending healing smooches all over Trink.
💟💜💚🐶💙💛💖

[Harley PoMMom]

Hi Marcela!!!!

Leslie, as always, you are doing an excellent job with Trinket...you are such an amazing person.

Love and hugs, Lori

[molly muffin]

i do hope you can find the right combination of food and softener, maybe even just food to get those poops soft enough not to be a problem for her.

Great to hear that she is still just her adorable little self though. What a girl.

[Squirt's Mom]

A short update on our Little Bauble...we are doing alright. Some days she is just fine and needs little to no help cleaning her bowels and other days she needs lots of help and other days she is constantly leaking resulting in frequent baths thru the day. So nothing much has changed and I don't really expect it to anymore. This is our life from now on. ;) I hired Monica Segal for a diet the end of Jan but still don't have the diet and I am really hoping that comes thru soon and is beneficial to her. Patience is NOT my forte! :rolleyes:

It seems the more we used the stool softener the more we needed to use it - she was up to a huge dose and still often woke up impacted so I have stopped that for now and am using the mineral oil only. I use that 1-2 times a day - any more and she can't keep anything in, which is unpleasant for us all. ;)

As for cush signs - her appetite remains huge, she continues to lick the floors, she continues to eat poop if I don't stay on top of it...and her when she's outside. However, she has lost weight with the "diet" she is on lately and hasn't needed the Lasix or Dandelion. As a result her drinking and peeing is normal. Her skin remains nice and pink tho thin. Glynda says her skin was "weird" from the beginning tho. ;) She's not losing hair but where her butt was shaved has not regrown much.

We will go see Dr. Erikson in a week or two for another ultrasound and maybe ACTH - tho I don't think the cortisol has come down much at all if any. This Lyso dose is too low tho it did shrink that growth.

So I will let ya'll know what we learn and/or decide after that visit. Thru all of this, Trink remains sweet, lovable, and cooperative.

[Harley PoMMom]

Thanks for the update Leslie, you and precious Trink are on my mind a lot and always in my prayers. You're doing an absolutely great job with our sweet girl, it takes a lot of love and patience to care for Trink the way you do.

Sending positive energy for a favorable outcome with her next vet visit.

Love and hugs, Lori

[mcdavis]

Pleased to hear that things are settling down a bit and you are finding out what works and doesn't. I hope you get the diet information soon - where our pets are concerned I find it hard to be patient too ;)

[molly muffin]

we all know that "new normal" path that one can find themselves on. Glad you and Trink are figuring out what your normal now is and how to deal with it the best way possible for both of you.

Hugs

[Whiskey's Mom]

Wow I was just reading Trink's thread--she is one tough little cookie and you are an amazing mamma. Wishing you all the best and hope her diet comes through soon.
Hugs to you both from Whiskey and me. :)

[mcdavis]

Just dropping by to let you know we're thinking about you and hoping things are going well. Any news on the diet yet?

[Squirt's Mom]

Thanks for checking on us! Yes, we finally got the diet...or actually Monica revamped a previous diet that worked really well until we added Vit E - then my itty bitty girl turned her nose up at it. I tried every form of Vit E and many different brands but she would have nothing to do with it. So Monica reworked those same ingredients and found that by adding more cod and beef liver and adjusting some of the the supplements, there was sufficient Vit E provided by the food itself, which we all like better anyway. ;) So once again my house smells like fish and liver! :D I spent about 8 days cooking on a daily basis then yesterday cooked a week's worth of food since she has done well on the transition. The way Monica works her diets, the dog starts on the food alone then you start adding in the supplements - like calcium, taurine, CoQ10, Vit B12, and so on - over time, letting the dog adjust to each addition. It takes about a month or a little longer before the pup is on the complete diet. So far, things are going good and Trink loves it. The calcium was added this week. :)

Trink had an appt this past Thurs for another ultrasound but her IMS was out sick so we rescheduled for this Thurs. So I will let ya'll know what we learn after our visit.

[mcdavis]

Yay, pleased to hear the diet is going well :)

[Harley PoMMom]

I am glad Monica was able to adjust her diet for the Vit E needed, YAA!! And also glad to hear that Trink loves her new diet, another YYYAAAA!!!!!! :)

[molly muffin]

Did Trink have her ultrasound today? How is she doing?

[Squirt's Mom]

Trink did have the US yesterday and the growth has not changed. I had hoped it would shrink some more but at least it hasn't grown. Her ACTH is "even higher than the first one" but I don't have the actual numbers yet. When I get them I will post them here. Her docs want to increase her Lyso to twice a week, still a VERY low dose. Her signs are still questionable to me except for the appetite and it is still very high. Maybe the increase will help with that. Her urination and drinking seem to be completely dependent on whether or not she is on the Lasix or Dandelion. Her urine is yellow, she does not have a potbelly, and I can get weight off of her easily. ALTHO her new diet has caused her to gain back some of the weight she had lost. That will be addressed asap as we want to keep her lean for the COPD (it helps her breath much easier and results in less coughing). So that's where we are....I am most grateful the US didn't show any other surprises or worsening of the growth nor her little rectal pouch. So for now we increase her Lyso and carry on! :)

[spdd]

The little bauble has the best care as far as I'm concerned any wee pup in this world could ever have... just keep on, keeping on as the saying goes. We know you are doing absolutely the very best.

[mcdavis]

Just dropping by to see how things are going for little Trink?

[Squirt's Mom]

Thanks for asking! Trink is doing well! There are no changes as far as her signs go but I'm not convinced there ever will be because I'm not convinced she actually has Cushing's. Her other issues are steady and we are managing quite well, thankfully. Well I have noticed one change....she is sleeping much more soundly and usually stays in bed for a bit after I get up instead of getting up when I do. But she's getting older and if I didn't have to get up to tend to her brother and sisters I'd stay in bed longer too! :D

[mcdavis]

I'm pleased to hear she's doing well. I think about her often, and try sending good vibes. As you say it may not be Cushings, but if the meds help then that's a good thing.
My mother always used to say that sleep was a great healer so the fact that she is sleeping better is a good thing. It reminds me of mornings when I would go to wake Hamish up and he would just raise an eyebrow at me as if to say "just another 30 minutes please". ;)

[molly muffin]

I like my sleep time too. More so as i get older.

Glad that Trinket is doing well. That's always good to hear

[mcdavis]

How's little Trinket doing? Hoping that all is well for her.

[Squirt's Mom]

Trink has been doing the same until today. Everything was the same until sometime after breakfast. It was time to do our "treasure hunt" :D and when I went to pick her up I found a spot where she had vomited. Just one. For the first time since all this with her rectum started she was not cooperative at all. I got it done but it was a fight....she was not my tail-wagging, tolerant itty bitty girl at all. :( She always get a bite after going thru this - she knows this and looks forward to getting it...but today she refused it, just walked away. :(

Her last dose (50mg) of Lyso was Fri morning. If our former belief about Lyso holds any truth, that Fri dose is peaking today, 48 hours post dose. She gets her dose every 3 days. We do have pred and lots of it so if I see any further signs or any strengthening of these signs she will get a dose asap.

She has vomited off and on since I got her and she has colitis as well as simple loose stools from time to time so I don't want to jump the gun with the pred. I am also wondering about that growth on her adrenal gland - what the signs would be if it were to rupture. I'm not even sure that is possible but it's a though that stays on my mind. Since I'm not positive exactly what that growth is, and her vets don't seem to know for sure either, it's hard to research and find out things about it.

I had hoped to be able to hold off on another US and ACTH but if she doesn't get better today I will be calling Dr. Erikson for an appt in the morning.

Ya'll keep her in your thoughts and prayers that this is just a little bump in the road. ;)

[Joan2517]

Praying for a teeny bump...

[labblab]

Surely hoping for improvement this morning so that both you girls can just stay home and rest up :o. Anxiously awaiting an update as soon as you know more, Les.

[Squirt's Mom]

I meant to update last nite but between grandson and friend, sick dogs, and the daily routines I forgot. Trink is doing better and by supper last nite she was hungry and leading the barkfest for food! YAY!! She threw up a little bit of foam not long after I posted yesterday but that was the end of it. I did not feed her first or second lunch to her and she didn't really seem to care. But by afternoon, she was accepting treats with glee once again and endured the cleaning process yesterday evening like she usually does. She was due her maintenance dose today but to be on the safe side I backed her schedule up one day so she will get her dose tomorrow if all goes well today. At the moment she is making the rounds from bowl to bowl making sure they are all well polished so it seems things are back to normal with her.

Just to make sure my day was interesting, Bud developed a loose bowel and had an accident on the ramp! :eek::eek: (we need a green-faced sick icon!) Not sure what he got into but I watched him and limited his food yesterday as well. By evening he was fine again, too, thankfully. He and Sophie both eat the same food and have lately developed the same horrid breath so I am going to switch food for them and see if that helps their guts. That may be what upset him....just not sure but he and Trink are both back to normal today thankfully.

[DoxieMama]

Glad that Trink (and Bud) are both doing well today.

[mcdavis]

So sorry to hear Trink had a couple of bad days but hopefully things will get back to "normal" for her. I think some dogs can have occasional vomiting especially as they get older. It would sometimes happen with Hamish but it didn't seem to actually affect him, so he would be totally fine in himself and there was just a bit of cleaning to do.
Keeping her and all of you in my thoughts.

[lulusmom]

I'm glad Trinket is doing better. When was the last stim test done and can you share the results please?

[molly muffin]

Always an adventure at your house Leslie. Glad to hear that all the dogs are back to normal and you can skip the green face icon for awhile. LOL

[Squirt's Mom]

She hasn't had an ACTH since the last one posted. I hope to get the ACTH and another ultrasound done in the next month.

[lulusmom]

Les, I waded back through a ton of pages and the only post stim test result I saw was the one you posted before treatment which was scary high. I don't think you've posted any stim tests since you started treatment. Can you go through your folder and post the results of the last one please?

[Squirt's Mom]

Glynda, on 03-24 I posted about her last ACTH - Dr. Erikson said it was "even higher" than the first one. And I keep forgetting to ask for a copy. :rolleyes:

[Squirt's Mom]

We've had another day like the one on the 25th of June - fine in the morning then sick. She vomited sometime after breakfast yesterday then again at 2 AM this morning. So we are going to see the vet at 12:30 today. Again, I don't think this is Lyso related but something is wrong. Truthfully, I am more worried about her kidneys and plan to ask for the SDMA along with everything else today. I will let you know what I learn when I get back. Please keep her in your thoughts and prayers.

[Squirt's Mom]

OH thank goodness! She just ate 4 little Zuke's peanut butter bites and is drinking water!! ~~WHEW~~ I am beginning to think it is the Seresto collar I put on her yesterday. It's her second Seresto and she had no reaction to the first but that doesn't mean she won't react to future collars....and I hope that is what her issue is. Yesterday she had her Lyso dose, started Zinc in her meals for the first time, and had the new collar put on. Maybe bad timing on my part to put in on her on the same day as her Lyso dose? ok...gotta get dressed and head to the vet. Spent some time brushing her and trying to clean her up a bit so she doesn't stink quite so much! :p

[labblab]

Hey Les, very relieved that Trinket is doing better! We'll still be very anxious to get the vet report, though. Sending tons of well wishes up to you guys!

[Squirt's Mom]

She was left at the vet for some STAT labs and maybe IV fluids or other things she may need. I will talk with the vet later today and we will go from there depending on how Trink is doing and what the labs show. I'll let you know when I do!

[mcdavis]

Just popping by to see how things were going so will keep her in my thoughts xx

[Squirt's Mom]

We are back home for the nite but she will go back in the morning. I will post the abnormal labs after I get back in the AM. Dr E said her electrolytes do NOT indicate Addison's but she gave her a shot of Dex and an antibiotic because her liver enzymes are up again. She wasn't really concerned about anything on the labs so far but they aren't all in. The ACTH will take a couple of days but with the electrolyes ok she's not too worried about those results. I think the SDMA will come on the later results as they weren't on the ones today...the lab that can do the fast results may not even do the SDMA yet. ;)

She came home and I fed her 1/2 of her usual meal portion and she ate it. I will offer the other half later tonite but so far that makes me feel much better.

More tomorrow but for now she seems to be better!

[DoxieMama]

I'm glad she seems better and ate something! I know how worrisome that can be for us. I'll be watching for your update today!

[Squirt's Mom]

Trink is back at the vet's this morning for more IV fluids and in case Dr. Erickson learns something that needs addressing asap. She ate a good breakfast - 1 1/2 times what she normally gets since she will miss her lunch and she was happy about the extra! :cool::):cool: She peed several times but has not pooped.

Ok here are the lab results so far. These are the first, the STAT, results. Dr. E split the blood and sent part to State Lab for STAT and part to IDEXX. The second set of results will be in later.

CHLO 97 mmol/l 105 -115
TCO2 27 mmol/l 17-24
Anion Gap 28 (no units) 12.0-24.0
BUN 30 mg/dl 12-25 :eek::eek:
Creatinine 0.5 mg/dl 0.8-2.0
BUN/Creatinine ratio 60.0 (no units) 6.0-39.0 :eek::eek:
Amylase 445 U/L 500-1500
Globulin 2.4 g/dl 2.7-4.4
ALT (SGTP) 183 U/L 5-60 :eek::eek::eek:
GGT 19 U/L 0-10
ALP 310 U/L 10-150
CK 392 U/L 10-200

Several of these values Dr. E wasn't concerned about - time in the vial, her laying down so much the prior 24 hour, and her known issues - but most of them make my heart thud much too hard. :(

[spdd]

Thinking about you today and dear Trink....

[mcdavis]

Keeping everything crossed for good news from Dr E. Thinking about Trinket and y'all

[molly muffin]

Oh my goodness Leslie. I'm sure your heart is pounding. When do the other results come in and what does Dr. E say?

[Squirt's Mom]

Hope was strong until about 30 minutes ago....now I just don't know. I reported in to the vet about 7 this morning, telling her how good Trink was doing but in the last hour or so things have changed dramatically. I found a small spot of vomit in the living room and now she does not want to be picked up or held. She acts panicked when you lift her and when you put her back down. She cannot settle but lays maybe a minute then is up turning in a circle and moving around, trying to get comfortable it seems. :( My itty bitty girl is not well but what our options are from here... ????? I'm gonna watch her a few more minutes then if things don't' start turning the other way we will be on our way back to see Dr. Erikson.

Dr. Erikson tried to talk to me about "being realistic" yesterday afternoon when I picked her up but both of us ended up crying in the waiting room, unable to voice that thought. Dr. E loves Trinket a great deal, they all do up there, everyone who has ever met her loves her. She's just so sweet and so so so tough. She commands respect and bathes you in love in exchange.

My precious itty bitty girl, our Little Bauble.........

[labblab]

Oh Leslie. Your K9C family is right there beside you in spirit, always. Sending my prayers and well wishes flying up to you girls!

[DoxieMama]

Thinking of you and sweet little Trinket this morning.

[Joan2517]

Praying for whatever is best for your itty, bitty girl, Leslie....

[Squirt's Mom]

Well after talking to a friend who slapped me around a bit to bring my back to my senses (blubbering mom and all ;):D ), I threw Trink in the truck and went back to the vet. She vomited twice more on the way up and was able to settle after that. Her vitals were good, no fever, physical exam good and they did an xray which was good all things considered - lungs no worse than last time, no fluids in lungs or around the heart, but the heart is a bit enlarged. She is not tender in the belly, which was a relief as Dr. Erikson and I both were worried about this growth on her adrenal but thankfully that does not seem to be the case. We left the vet with the assumption this is food related. She is eating a home-cooked diet of cod, sweet potato and beef liver. She has done well on it for several months but ya never know. She started eating a new batch Sun when she got sick the first time and has been eating that since she got home. So something in the food may be off or her little tummy may have just decided it wasn't going to do that right now. She rode home ok and did ok for a bit at home but vomited twice more while I was at the store getting some rice and beef for her...bland diet on the way! ;)

Dr. Erikson wants to stop the Lyso and there is really no reason to continue it. Her cortisol is not responding (even tho I still have doubts about that diagnosis in the first place ;) ) and while it did shrink that growth on her adrenal that has leveled out and the added chemicals from the Lyso are just not worth it for her with everything else she has to deal with, her other meds, and her age. It's a waste of my money and not doing her that much good. In addition the added vet visits and blood draws needed to monitor stress her out no end now...being at the vet period stresses her out these days unless I am holding her. She did do ok left in the cage for IV fluids but if they came to mess with her she got stressed so the ACTH's would be iffy any way.

Yesterday afternoon when I went to pick her up after day 2 on IV fluids she had an episode of some sort. Dr. E said she got really upset taking the IV out - it probably hurt. Her breathing was alarming and wouldn't calm down. It reminded me of Josie, my little foster that had the tumor between her heart and trachea - VERY rough and raspy, thudding on the exhale. We watched her a few seconds hoping being with me would calm her but it didn't so Dr. E gave her some Lasix and we sat in the waiting room for a while to see if that would help. I had to go pee and when I sat on the toilet Trink squatted and peed on the floor by me. :p We waiting a while longer after that and she breathing slowed enough I was comfortable leaving with her and Dr E was comfortable with us goin but it was SCARY for a bit there! Her breathing was a bit faster than normal at home but nothing like at the clinic. She had a couple of episodes of that harsh breathing after 9PM last nite but they didn't last long at all and she has had no more that I have seen...and I think I would hear her no matter where she was in the house!

She has had a tough few days since Sun afternoon but I am going to hold firm that she will get back in balance with some new food. I wasn't at ALL sure of that last time I posted but feel a bit better after the vet checked her out. Dr. E is off today but we are still in contact several times a day and I know she was on the phone to the vet who saw her as soon as I hung up from reporting to her what the exam showed.

Thank ya'll....I love this little baby as much as I do Squirt and I'm no where near ready for her to join her sister and others, I'm just not. So I will keep fighting as long as she does...and ya'll keep praying.

[mcdavis]

Still have everything crossed, sending good vibes and hoping that things will turn around and start to improve with the change of food.

[molly muffin]

Oh Leslie, I know you must be consumed with worry for your little itty bitty girl. I do hope that there is something that can be done to help her. She is such a doll and not a more lovely personality around.

big hugs and white healing light to you my friend

[DoxieMama]

You got it, Leslie. Healing prayers and positive energies on their way.

[molly muffin]

Well whew okay so hopefully the new food and bkanspd will help her

[Harley PoMMom]

I'm just now getting caught up on the threads and OMGoodness, I am so sorry to hear our sweet girl is having some trouble :( sending tons of positive energy your way. Hoping, too, that the bland diet does the trick, please keep us updated.

Love and hugs, Lori

[Squirt's Mom]

Trink and I have had a very long hard day. About 3:30-4 AM I reached out to touch her, just checking, and my hand landed in a cold gooey mess. But she was warm and breathing and that was the main thing. I turned on the light and saw very dark stuff on the white towel she was sleeping on. Jumping up and rushing about to go to the ER about 45 min from here, she went limp in my arms just as I was about to open the truck door. So I took her back inside. I wasn't going to have her pass on the way or in a cage...I would be holding her. I went back to bed and put her on my chest to hold her, be close to her for as long as needed. I noticed she was smacking her mouth and it was obviously dry so I got a syringe and put a drop or two in her mouth to help keep her as comfortable as possible...which she acted as if she were swallowing and then smacked again so I gave her a couple more drops with the same result. I dripped water for about an hour then added some honey to the water and dripped it for about 15 min. She kept that down for 30 min or so and I added some slippery elm bark making a very thin mix and dripped that for about 15 min. Then I watched for about an hour and she was keeping that down so I gave her more.

Over the day I have slowly, very slowly, worked her up from this honey and SEB mix to this mix with NutriCal added to rice broth to the NutriCal mix with rice broth to that with some beef broth to finally some boiled beef around 2:30 this afternoon. She kept that down so she got some more broth with NutriCal followed by more boiled beef 30 min ago.

She has been out to pee twice, walking on her own both times and holding herself up to pee both times. After getting the broths down she started rolling over for me to rub her belly when I would pet her while checking on her....some of her sweet personality coming thru.

As I calmed over the morning and had time to pay attention to what she had upchucked - it is very dark but green and has no odor. It had no odor when I found it. I put a sample in a baggie for the ER and have pulled that baggie out to smell this afternoon and still no odor....so I don't know what it is or anything. But with no odor and the dark green color it isn't blood which was my first thought and fear.

Dr. Erikson and I have been talking on the phone all day just about hourly....after Trink's episode after taking the IV out Tues neither of us wanted to repeat that and since she has been responding to my "treatment" there is no need....and I hope there won't be!

I will update tomorrow but now it's time to feed her brother and sisters!

[mcdavis]

I'm so sad to read this, but it does sound like she's responding to your treatment so will keep everything crossed that things get better.

Both Hamish and Henry have vomited greeny yellow odourless stuff when their stomach's are empty so I'm wondering if it's something similar. With Henry we have to give him 3 meals a day as he cannot go for more than 8 hours without food, so maybe Trink needs to be fed little and often, as you have been doing?

Massive hugs for both of you

[molly muffin]

Oh Leslie, what a horrible day but I'm so glad to hear that she responded. She does seem to be having a very hard time lately and I'm hoping this is only some sort of temporary thing that she can over come as she has so often over come other things.

You are both in my heart and thoughts dear Leslie.

[DoxieMama]

I am so glad you were able to help her yesterday, and hope she continues to do better and better today.

[Squirt's Mom]

I accidentally fell asleep around 3 this morning and woke up at 6:30 to find she has gone backward again so off to the vet. Once again her exams are good...they are stumped as to what is going on with her. Her behavior today is what they would see in kidney and/or liver failure....but she is not in that situation according to labs. It is possible this is neurological...which fits with what I believe is wrong - I poisoned her Sun. morning by putting a new Seresto collar on her just after she had taken her Lsyo dose. Either that or something about the fish in her new batch of food was toxic. SOMEthing has poisoned her and I think it was the combination of Lyso and the collar.....that's my thinkso because the timing is so so suspicious! It is also VERY reminiscent of when Squirt had that stroke and the months following it. We started Trink on Cerenia yesterday and are to continue that for the next few days. I am going to get her some Beechnut baby food in a little bit to go with her beef broth.

I told them at the clinic this morning that if this was one of my hospice babies I would know exactly what to look for and what steps to take when. With my own babies I just lose it and become a panicked, blubbering fool. I've tried to make my mind look at this as just another rescue situation but I can't, I simply cannot. This is TRINKET, my itty bitty girl and I cannot stand her being sick like this. She has fought and overcome so much and is still fighting this mess, whatever it is. And I will keep fighting with her....

Please keep the prayers, good vibes, healing energies, whatever positive you have to offer going for her. Thanks!

[mcdavis]

Prayers, good thoughts, positive vibes, and anything else I can think that might help....

[DoxieMama]

Leslie... will you do something for me? Put your right hand on your left arm near the shoulder. Now cross your left arm over and put it on your right arm near your shoulder. Close your eyes and squeeze...

That's the closest I can get to giving you a hug right now.

Any time you need one, just do that. Imagine all of us surrounding you and giving you those hugs. One at a time or all together.

You got this lady. And we've got you.

Lots more prayers going up, too!

[Joan2517]

If she has been poisoned, is there something the vet could give her? What was the collar? A flea one? Lena had a terrible reaction to a Zodiac flea/tick application that I gave her once...it took 3 days for her system to settle down.

Hang in there, Leslie, maybe it will pass....Hugs!!!!

[Harley PoMMom]

As Shana said, we are here for you Leslie, our arms are outstretched and ready to embrace you both. Prayers being said and sent.

Love and hugs, Lori

[Carole Alexander]

Leslie, we are all thinking of you and little Trink; I hope she has stabilized by now. I just read about lots of allergic reactions to Seresto flea collars, but none associated with Lysodren. This is very bizarre and I can only hope that she will pull thru this. And, with your help she has a great shot.

[Squirt's Mom]

Quick update since i am sick...Trink is holding her own. She has improved a bit - she is sitting and standing with no help; takes a few steps in the yard and holds herself up to pee; and she is drinking a bit on her on. But she still refuses to eat even with the Cerenia on board for 3/12 hours now. It worked quickly the last two doses but this one not so much. I give her a few drops of honey water every few hours...that is the only thing she will take from me, everything else she either spits out or it simply falls out the side of her open mouth. But I'll take the absence of jerking and the little bit water she is taking on her own for now. More later...back to bed for me, right beside Trink. ;)

[molly muffin]

I'm sorry to hear that you are sick Leslie. Hopefully nothing dire.

Great that Trinket is holding her own and not getting worse. Just waiting for the update that she is eating on her own and getting stronger.

[mcdavis]

Still keeping everything crossed, sending positive vibes, and saying prayers. I too have read about reactions to the seresto collars so think that the Lysodren is a red herring, and that the collar has caused the problem on it's own.
Hope that when you read this you're both feeling at least a wee bit better.

[Carole Alexander]

I'm hoping you both are recovering from all that ails each of you.

[Squirt's Mom]

Trink finally ate a small amount, maybe a tbsp, of baby food around 2:30-3 yesterday afternoon then another teeny bite, about half the first bite, around 8:30PM. She continued to drink on her own and was sitting, walking, etc a bit better - still very weak and weebly-wobbly but moving on her own for short distances in the yard to pee. She hasn't fallen over outside since Fri evening. This morning she woke up around 6 hungry! and ate almost half the contents straight from the baby food jar! I put the rest in a bowl for her but she was thru for then. Around 8:30 this morning she did eat another tbsp or so. I don't plan to give her any Cerenia today and hope her morning appetite is a sign she has finally turned the corner. She has not been able to keep any of her COPD meds down since Sun morn but other than those few respiratory episodes early last week her breathing has been ok....in fact this morning it is actually good with nothing on board to help her breath. She does have a little bit of nasal mucous so I plan to try to get her pill for that down later today - we do NOT need pneumonia again!

As for me, I do feel better...as if the sicky part is done and that washed out feeling and a headache is all that remains. We have two Yorkie males staying with us for a couple of weeks who came in yesterday - horrid timing and if this hadn't been arranged long before Trink got sick they wouldn't be here...but here they are! :D I was too sick and exhausted to get a place ready for them before they came so yesterday they had to stay in wire crates. This morning tho I got the expen set up and they are now happily humping each other. :rolleyes: I would love to let them have full run of the house but neither one is neutered so they mark horribly....and I am not having that again so the expen (seating in a sea of peepee pads! :p ) is where they will spend a good deal of their time. My babies are confused about the loss of the LR floor space but they will adjust. Trink is the one that will have the most trouble if she is up and about before they leave and I certainly plan for her to be! But she is sharp and will quickly learn a new path around the pen to her favorite spot....if not I will figure something out! ;)

[Harley PoMMom]

Glad to hear that you are feeling better, Leslie, make sure to take care of yourself. I am thrilled to read that Trinket's appetite has picked up and will continue to keep you both in my thoughts and prayers.

Love and hugs, Lori

[molly muffin]

Yay, so glad that Trinket ate a bit. Just not eating is likely to make her feel weak, so I'm hoping that with further appetite coming back, she'll also regain strength.

Oh lordy girl! 2 humping yorkies! ROFLMAO!!! I'm sorry but that is just such a funny picture in my head and I love yorkies, but golly. hahahaha You do keep things hopping around there. :)

[Squirt's Mom]

Trink did so well Sun I thought she was over the hump but yesterday she slid backward again. We are going to see Doc B this morning if we can to see if fresh eyes can find the problem and solution. I don't know if Dr. Erikson et al have given up on her or what but I don't feel like Trink needs to go back to see them right now. I'm doing all I know to do and it is not enough so Doc B is our last hope. :(

[molly muffin]

I sincerely hope that Dr B will come up with a solution. Just heart breaking to hear of her struggling and knowing how stressful this is for both of you.

[Budsters Mom]

I'll never think of Hump Day the same again! :D:D:D

[mcdavis]

Absolutely everything crossed, good thoughts, vibes and prayers that Dr B can help.

[Squirt's Mom]

We came home with ringers lactate, syringes, Carafate, Mertzipine, and instructions on how to put water under her skin and the dose to keep her hydrated. Doc said the stuff she vomited Thurs morning looked like it could be digestive bleeding as from an ulcer so he started her on some Carafate in the hopes that would help. He doesn't think this is from the tick collar tho admits it could be....they just haven't heard of any reactions like what is going on with her. He gave her another injection of Baytril, one of Cerenia, and one of B-12. He said she is not done which made me feel a bit better. I think I still see fight in her but question if I am seeing ME wanting her to fight so badly I am missing the signs...but he thinks she still has a chance IF she will start eating and drinking again. He said her lungs and heart sound good thankfully. I told him this has been a cycle of ups and downs and every down is a bit lower than the last time with this morning being her worst yet.

I had some appts myself this afternoon and hated to leave her but she did ok. When I came in a bit ago I offered her water but she refused and she refused the food. So I fed her some baby food via a dropper and some NutriCal water which she grudgingly took. And now I'm off to lay beside her a while.

[mcdavis]

From everything you've told us, and from how well the vets know you, I really believe that they would tell you if they thought that you were missing the signs.
I know this is probably a silly question, and I'm sure the vets have checked, but is there something in her mouth that's causing her to not want to eat or drink? I only ask because I was just reading about a dog that lost it's appetite until it had a dental and a number of teeth pulled, and afterwards it's appetite was good.

[Carole Alexander]

I really hope that you and Trink are sleeping soundly at this time and that she will show advancement in the morning. Good night sweet Trincket.

[spdd]

Thinking and praying with all my heart that all good things are present today..... so worried for you Leslie.

[Squirt's Mom]

Thank you all soooo much! This morning Trink is no better and last nite she vomited again, first time since last Thurs that I can recall - the NutriCal water and the teeny bit of beef broth I got down her. Otherwise she remains the same. Still refusing all food and water by mouth, very weak, but peeing on her own when taken out (tho I have to hold her up for the last couple of days). She has not rolled over for a belly rub since Sat evening and no tail wags. :( It's time for her morning skin pillows so I gotta go check the bag to see if it's warm yet. I'll be back later to let you know how she is doing. Please help me bring a miracle to her....

[DoxieMama]

Prayers and healing thoughts going out all day...

[Harley PoMMom]

Tons of prayers being said and sent...Huge loving hugs coming from my home to yours.

[mcdavis]

Praying and hoping for a miracle, and sending massive hugs to you all.

[mommyslittlegirl]

Thinking of you Leslie, and your little Trinket.

[Squirt's Mom]

Our Little Bauble has flown. Today she refused to even swallow and I knew she was telling me she was too tired to fight any longer. So we went to see Doc B just a bit ago. On the way I kept telling her to hang in there and I could hold her again soon. As we pulled up at the clinic she lost control of her bladder. They took us into an exam room immediately and as I was walking thru the doorway she left on her own, in my arms as promised.

Right about now my itty bitty baby girl is getting reunited with her sisters and brothers who were waiting for her at the Rainbow Bridge. I have no doubt Gia is head over heals in love with her and holding Trink to her heart, covering her with kisses. I believe with all my being that Trinket is whole now, all her illnesses and "handicaps" wiped away in the blink of an eye. Trinket can finally see her brother, Brick, and her sister, Squirt, and all the others she knew in her life here with me. I made her another promise, one I believe with all my being - that I would see her again, hold her again, kiss her again.

But right now I miss her so.......... Fly free, my precious itty bitty baby girl, fly free

[labblab]

Leslie, my heart is with you. I am so deeply sorry for your loss, there is just no more that I can think to say right now. But please know my heart is with you. And like you, I trust and believe that Trink is being cradled in love there at The Bridge. From one set of loving arms to another, all in the blink of an eye.

[Joan2517]

Oh, Leslie...I'm so sorry. The dear, sweet little girl. I was so hoping she would recover. I am so happy that you were with her, though. She knew to the end how much she was loved.

So many, many hugs to you.

[mcdavis]

Oh Leslie, I'm so sorry to read this. You did everything you possibly could, more even, and I was praying for a miracle.
Run free little Trinket

[Budsters Mom]

I am so very sorry. :o Our little bitty girl will be missed greatly.

[DoxieMama]

I'm sorry, Leslie. Trinket is most definitely surrounded by those she loved, fully healed forever. She has joined the others who wait for the day when you shall see them and hold them all again. Until then, I know you'll hold them close in your heart.

So many tears...

RIP sweet little one.

[Carole Alexander]

Leslie, my deepest sympathy in your loss of precious Trinket. You gave her your all. I wish so much that it could have been enough.

[spdd]

I know your heart is broken, but Trink is well again. She fought a great fight and went in her own time and her own way.... lots of love Leslie to you being sent.... you are just the best Momma any fur baby could ever, ever have.... Huge Hugs to you my friend for many days to come.

[molly muffin]

Oh Leslie I just saw the news. I am so very, very sorry. There are no words for the heart break I know you are feeling. :(

Sending you big hugs. Just devastating.

[Harley PoMMom]

Dearest Leslie,

My heart is breaking as I read this news and I am so sorry for the loss of your precious girl. Through your posts we were so blessed to know her and love her, and she will be missed very much. You are such an amazing Mom to all of your furbabies so I hope you are able to find some comfort in knowing that Trink had the best of everything with you as her Mom.

We love you, Leslie, and are here for you.

Sending huge loving hugs, Lori

[Spiceysmum]

Dear Leslie,
So sorry to hear that your beloved Trinket has passed away. She had a wonderful life with you and I know you will miss her so much. Thinking of you.

Linda X

[addy]

Leslie, I can't begin to express how I felt when I read about Trinket.
I am so very sorry.

No words that I can think of to write seem right.

Fly free, little Bauble, your mom loves you very much.

Love,
Addy

[Truffa's Mom]

Oh my sweet friend, I am so saddened by this, my heart broke in pieces when I read your post. Yes I know she's whole and free of all the physical pain that her little body endured, but our hearts just feel the pain of losing them. I am out of words to console you, but I understand all too well what you feel. She had an absolutely wonderful life with you, and it brings joy to my heart that she was cared and loved by you, and that her spirit flew to the Bridge, directly from your loving arms. To me it means that she loved you so much, that her last goodbye had to be on her terms and just between the two of you. Through you we have learned to love all of your babies, so this feels like we all lost one of our own. Sending you love and big tight hugs. I'll be lighting some candles for sweet little Trink. I love you my friend 💜💚💜💚

[mypuppy]

Dearest Leslie,
First, tight tight hugs. The tightest ones ever. I have not been here in quite some time because my heart aches when I read on all the babies flying to the Rainbow Bridge. Sadly, I just learned yesterday that your Trinket grew her wings. It pains me because I know what deep grief this causes you mommy. :-(. But as you said, she is now with her sweet sister Gia and the rest of her fur siblings and with my sweet Princess and all our other precious babies. I have a visual of that, and it lifts me like no other. My dear friend, your little bauble is home free now, but I know right now the tears are many. We love and miss you incredibly much, and pray and hope for strength in the many days to come. Rest in peace to your little girl.

Love love love you...OOOOOOOOOOO's

[mommyslittlegirl]

Dear Leslie, so sorry for the loss of your precious little Trinket. You are the best and loving mommy a furbaby could have. And Trinket knew that and felt it every day. Love is forever.

[PennysDad]

I am just catching up on the threads and this breaks my heart. You did everything you could and showered Trink with love.

What a blessing for her that she was able to leave in your arms. Even if she was in pain, just being in your arms makes her the happiest she could ever be. Once she was able to relax in your arms, she was able to leave in peace.

You are in our thoughts.

Jeff

[Squirt's Mom]

Thank you all so much. Right now, I can't talk much about my itty bitty girl. Because no one seemed to know what happened and because I was terrified she had gotten into something in our environment that the others might also get into and suffer the same fate, I had a necropsy done. The results came in yesterday. What 3 docs had diagnosed as a cyst in her groin was actually a hernia and it captured then cut off a portion of her small intestines. The agony my poor little girl was in and she never showed it. I kept asking her to fight and fight she did even tho she never had a chance of winning. For 10 days she fought and for 10 days she was in indescribable pain. I am too horrified for words. :(:(:(:(:(:(:(:(:(:(:(:(:(:(:(:(:(:(:(:(:(:(:(:(

[spdd]

Oh Leslie, I have been worrying and wondering about you for days now. What an ordeal you have and are going through. I am so, so sorry to hear about what Trink went through, not nearly as much as you must be I'm sure. Please know that I am keeping you on my heart every day, and hopefully (I say this knowing full well it takes forever and still haunts me) you will be able to come to terms with the loss, even though our hearts break for years to come. Miss you my friend, and many, many hugs and much love going your way.

[Joan2517]

That is just heartbreaking, Leslie...you did everything you could with what you knew. If only our babies could talk and tell us what they are feeling.

[molly muffin]

Oh leslie. :( I don't even know what to say other than no mater who Trinket was feeling, I would put money on her wanting to spend as long with you as she could. What a wonderful bond you two had. Hold that close to your heart when the despair wants to rush in. We love you!

[labblab]

Dear Leslie, you and Trink have never been far from my mind during these past few days, even as I've struggled to find the words I wanted to say. Without a doubt, I feel as though I understand your horror over discovering what was ailing Trink and the pain it likely caused. So I can also easily imagine all the recrimination and self-doubt that you may be feeling, yourself.

There is likely nothing I can say to change your feelings about this, but I still want to write out one very important fact: There was no way you could have known what was ailing her. The vets didn't know, and you didn't know. And so nature took it's course in due time, just as it does for every wild animal who has no hospital to turn to. One enormous difference from life in the wild, though, is that Trink had YOU alongside her, loving her and doing your best to comfort her, every step of the way and every moment until her body turned off and her spirit was released. You remained beloved companions throughout it all. She was never alone and she was always held and cherished in soothing hands.

Please, please try to be kind to yourself, Leslie, and do not blame yourself for not knowing what was unknowable. What we do know is how lucky you and Trink were to have one another and to love one another. And nothing that has happened will ever change that.

Sending so many loving hugs to you, myself.

[Budsters Mom]

Awwww Leslie.:o The bottom line is that you didn't know. Nobody did. Not even the doctors. I realize that this isn't going to help you feel any better, but you loved her like no other and she knew that. You did everything humanely possible with the knowledge you had at the time. That's all any of us can do for our babies.

I am so very sorry that this happened and wish I could say write something that would ease your pain, but only time can do that. Know that we are here for you. ooooo

Kathy

[Harley PoMMom]

Oh Leslie,

There is absolutely no reasons in the world for you to feel any guilt, you went above and beyond to make Trink better. Please, please stop being so hard on yourself, we love you, Leslie.

[mcdavis]

Dear Leslie, you and Trink have been on my mind so much over the last days. I so want to be able to say something which will take the pain away, but I know that isn't possible. However please do not feel guilty because you did everything you possibly could, more even, yet you couldn't have known what was happening.

[Squirt's Mom]

In addition to struggling with her last days, like too many times before I find so very much has abruptly changed since my itty bitty girl left.

Mealtimes go so fast. No schedule to keep. No food to weigh and cook or thaw and warm. No pills and capsules to wrap and hide. No powders to measure, no drops to dole out. No cues to give so the blind can find their spots. No one to lead Barkfest.

Poop patrol continues but the orange leaves fool me over and over because they look so much like her poop while eating her sweet potato strong diet. And not finding her poop still leads my mind to start preparing to clean out her pouch. But then I remember she doesn’t have to put up with that now…. then I can’t see the orange leaves any longer.

My bed holds only me at bedtime for the first time since the ‘70’s. There is no comforting body pressed to mine. Those spots where my daughter lay in her infancy and throughout her childhood, where each cat and dog lay are now cold when my hands and feet quest out for those still-familiar warmths. The covers are unpinned, my feet and legs free to move as they wish. I don’t think there will be any others to sleep with me. It’s just too painful when their spot grows cold.

Candles, incense, air fresheners, etc. are no longer restricted but I’ve grown accustomed to our unique scent.

Furniture and other items can be moved around now….everyone here can see where those things are at all times. But old habits are hard to break.

Thank you all for your comments. They mean the world to me. I’m taking time to heal a little bit and work thru some things.

[labblab]

Les, thank you for returning to check in with us. You, and Trink, are missed so very much. :o :o

Wishing so much I could throw my arms around you. Wishing so much I could help fill the void and ease some of the pain. Please just know how much you are loved and how dearly little Trink will be remembered.

Sending prayers for peace and comfort flying to your home and heart, my friend.

[molly muffin]

Wait, isn't Bud sleeping with you? Did I miss something there?

Oh Leslie, I wish I too could give you a big hug and tell you that you aren't alone. Love you!

[Squirt's Mom]

It's been almost a month since my itty bitty girl left. We (Sophie, Fox, Bud, and I) are trying to adjust to our new norm. For the first week+ we had two house guests who came with a whole host of new "adventures" ;):p that kept us hopping but they have gone home now and it's just us - the "us" that will be for a while....but us' always change. :( So we are trying to settle in and create a space that is ours. These new spaces seem to hold as many memories and "ghosts" as they do the tangible....maybe more.

Trink's death seems to be having a cathartic affect in my world. Many of the deaths in my life have (my daughter and dad) but Squirt and Trink in particular have had/are having a profound affect. Much is still dark to me but the light is there as well and it is growing. I don't know what tomorrow will bring but I know I won't face it alone, my babies are always around me.

Sharlene, Bud did sleep with me when he first came but he sheds horribly plus he got to be a bed hog and I can't fight him all night for the edge of the bed. :p He has a large crate which he actually likes so he sleeps there now. When I wake up he comes and gets in bed with me while I drink my coffee and watch the morning news. Then again at bedtime he lays with me until it's time to go to sleep, usually around 9. The day he gets groomed I sometimes let him stay in bed that night because he's not filling my mouth with dog hair but that doesn't last long.

[spdd]

Oh Leslie.. the memories you brought back with hair in the bed and nightime cuddles. Been thinking about you a lot over the last little while. As many times as we have told you what a wonderful Mommy and support you are to others, I know it doesn't lessen the pain for you, it probably never will, but I for one love you for all you have done for others and myself. We just somehow keep going and in time are able to function a little better. Love you my friend.

[Whiskey's Mom]

Leslie,
I'm sorry my condolences are so late. Please accept my deepest and heartfelt sympathy on the loss of your sweet little girl. I don't know how I missed this when I was catching up, but again I am so sorry.
Annie